Patrick Jane's Daughter
by eblonde
Summary: When a young girl walks into the CBI claiming to be Jane's daughter, how will he cope and who will be there for him when his world comes crashing down around him? -Jisbon Rating may change in further chapters NOW COMPLETE!
1. Prologue

_Patrick Jane's Daughter_

_PROLOGUE_

A/N just thought i would try this story out, its been niggling at the back of my mind for a while now =]

Disclaimer: I own nothing =(

It was like any other day in the CBI building. Rigsby was scavenging for food in the kitchen, Van Pelt was playing on her laptop, Cho was reading a book, Lisbon was in her office trying to finish some of her ever growing pile of paper work and Jane was lying on his infamous couch. No one had noticed the short blonde girl enter the room.

"Jane! Get your pain in the arse butt in here now!"

"It's you." the blonde said with wide blue eyes, directing the comment at Jane.

"It's me who?" asked Jane.

"You're Jane? Are you not? Patrick Jane?

"Jane! I said get in here!" Lisbon had shouted again.

"Ah.. the one and only. And who would you be?" he asked sceptically.

The girl took a breath, exhaling slowly, as if trying to calm herself down.

"My name is Greer Thomson. My mother is Tracy Thomson. I am seventeen years old.. and I am your daughter."


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N I have no idea where this is going, I'm just playing with some ideas. Let me know what you think =]**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

_(Jane's POV)_

"That's impossible." Lisbon had walked into the room as the girl had spoken. Jane, who for once, was at a loss for words, remained silent. This truly couldn't be happening.

"No I assure you, it is quite possible, and quite true."

"How old did you say you were?" Lisbon asked.

"Seventeen."

The girl started shifting uncomfortably. By this point Jane's shoulders had slumped forward slightly. He couldn't bear to look at the girl. If he did he was sure to find the truth, and he wasn't sure he was ready for it just yet. The rest of the team had stopped what they were doing to listen in on the conversation.

"And it took this long to tell him?" Lisbon continued. "What is it you really want? What are you really here for? Money? A get out of jail free card? You can't possibly be his daughter."

For the first time, Jane looked up at the girl properly. She had long blonde wavy hair and strong cheekbones that displayed confidence and arrogance throughout her beautiful face. Her icy blue eyes were swimming with tears. -Her eyes… _his _ eyes.

"Lisbon." Jane said, speaking for the first time.

"What?"

"Shut up."

"Excuse me?"

"Can't you see your upsetting her?"

"Jane… you can't possibly believe…"

"Tracy was very much a part of my life. She was.. before… my wife, and besides.." he said looking up at the girl again. "she has my eyes."

"Jane? Can I talk to you for a moment? Over there?"

"Excuse me." he said to Greer, as he got up and followed Lisbon across the room. Greer just stood there awkwardly, looking after the consultant.

"Jane. What the hell do you think you're doing? You can't just believe that she's your daughter because she has the same eyes as you. She has blonde hair. A lot of girls with blonde hair have blue eyes."

"Explain the cheekbones then… and the wave to her hair. She just looks like me… and she seems genuine."

"Jane… we work together, we're like family. I just don't want to see you get hurt if she turns around and leaves. It almost seems as if you're trying to replace your…"

"Is that what you think I'm doing?" Jane interrupted, completely taken by surprise. "You think that me being nice to a girl claiming to be my daughter, is me trying to replace my dead wife and child? Lisbon, I don't even know her! I haven't even said I believe her yet! I'm just trying to give her the benefit of the doubt. And there's Tracy… she was my best friend… it was a one off… sleeping with her… nobody knew."

"Jane." Lisbon said placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. Patrick tensed slightly at the unnatural touch. "All I'm saying is be careful."

Jane sighed.

"Thanks Lisbon." He turned away from his boss and walked across the room back to his couch, where Greer had taken a seat. His head was spinning. How could he have a daughter? Well he knew how… but really? And why had Tracy hidden this from him for so many years? Didn't he have a right to know? Jane sat down beside her.

"I'm sorry about that."

Greer looked at him. "That's ok. Your friend is just looking out for you. She cares. I had no idea how you were going to react, but I found your reaction to be quite fair."

Jane couldn't stop staring at her. The more he looked at her, the more he saw himself hidden in there.

"Can I ask you a question Greer?" she smiled as he said her name, sending small shivers down his spine. Could this beautiful girl really be his?

"Sure, ask away. Because I have so many questions too, so it's only fair."

Jane chuckled slightly at her innocence. "Why is it I'm only just finding out about you now?"

"Good question. I only found out who my father was a couple of months ago. I'm not really one hundred percent sure why, but my mother didn't want me to know who you were. She said that I was better off not knowing… whatever that means, but I always felt like something was missing, you know?"

"Yeah. I know. I just don't understand though. Your mother was my best friend. It would have been nice to have known… it would have been nice to have something positive to focus on…" Jane looked away sadly. All of the pain and grief from the past few years, were slowly starting to build up in his chest. He had a daughter. A _live _ daughter. Here she was, sitting right in front of him. Wanting to know him. He had nothing to offer her. He didn't live anywhere nice –well he camped out at CBI most nights, the only family he had were the team. She came here wanting to get to know him, and yet, he didn't even know himself.

"Um… Patrick?" Greer said, breaking his line of worried thought.

"Yes?"

"My mother doesn't know I'm here. She promised I would be able to choose how I spent my time, and yet, she forbade me from coming to see you. She said that all you were was trouble."

"Ouch… Meh, I guess she has her reasons. But I guess you should call her. Here, use my cell." He said handing his phone to her.

"Thanks" she said giving him one of her nervous smiles, before walking out of the room.

Patrick leant forward and put his head in his hands. He felt sick, he felt betrayed. How could Tracy have kept this from him? He had a kid. She knew what he had been through. Hell, everyone did. He still wasn't even sure if the girl was telling the truth or not. Sure she looked like him. But what if Lisbon was right? What if she was just here to get something out of him? But why go to all that trouble? He sighed, his breath catching a little. There was a thought that kept itching the back of his mind. Could she be working for Red John?


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N Reviews are like Christmas... Makes me happy. Pleease review! I want to know what you think! =]**

**Disclaimer: Still nothing!**

Jane was broken out of his reverie by the phone ringing.

"Van Pelt." Grace answered. She listened for a moment before replying. "Ok. We'll be right there." She hung up the phone. "New case. Woman found dead outside a coffee shop."

"Ok guys," Lisbon said, switching into boss mode. "You three go on ahead, me and Jane will follow shortly."

Greer stepped back into the room, just as Lisbon had finished giving her orders and the rest of the team had left. Patrick got up and walked over to where Lisbon was standing. He leant in so he could whisper in her ear.

"What about Greer?"

"What about her?"

"Well, if she is who she says she is, I want to keep her close. If I have just found out about her, Red John surely can't be far behind." He paused, passing a little of his grief onto Lisbon, as he said the name and remembered that horrible night. She shuddered slightly. "If she _is_ an imposter," Jane continued, "wouldn't it make sense to keep an eye on her? Deny her what she's truly after?"

"Yeah, I guess that makes sense." She replied, the pitch of her voice raising a little. "But you're on babysitting duty. Keep her out of trouble. If anything goes wrong Jane, so help me… it will be your pretty little neck on the line."

"Thank you Lisbon." He said. A mischievous grin started splaying across his face.

"What Jane?"

"You think I'm pretty!" He reached out and grabbed her shoulder. "Aww Lisbon! You think I'm pretty!"

"Jaane…" Lisbon complained.

"Hey you said it. And you know you can't deny a pretty man. I'm just too adorable." He ran off in the direction of Greer, leaving Lisbon dumfoundedly looking after him. She sighed as she stood, watching them. Jane was telling Greer that a new case had come up, causing them to have to leave the CBI.

"I think it's best if you come along with us." Jane said. He didn't want to tell her either of his reasons why. But if she really was his daughter, he wasn't sure how much she knew about his life. He wasn't even sure if she knew about Red John. "It'll be boring here anyway, and besides, it could give us an opportunity to get to know one another a little better."

Greer beamed at him. "I'd like that." She said. "Oh, here." She said handing Jane his phone back.

"How did she take it?" Jane asked.

"Not well. But I convinced her that I am fine and I'll be careful. I'll just have to ring every hour on the hour… otherwise she'll think you've sucked me into your bad habits." Greer smiled at him. She has his teeth. She just looks so much like him. how could she not be his daughter? Lisbon made her way over to where they were standing.

Greer directed her gaze at Lisbon. "Are you sure this is ok?"

Lisbon sighed. She has a niece around this age, and she knows what teenagers are capable of. But Jane was right. They had to keep her safe, and keep an eye on her.

"Yes its fine with me. Just don't go wondering off… and stay out of trouble. Both of you." She added looking at Jane as well.

"You can't deny me Lisbon!" Jane called over as his shoulder as he made his way to the elevator, "You can never deny a pretty man."

Lisbon scowled at him. He irked her. He always had, and most probably always would. Sure she cared for the man. God, when he was attacked and nearly drowned she had just about lost it. He was an amazing friend and she couldn't live without him… but sometimes she really wished she could learn how to.

When Lisbon reached the SUV, the front passenger seat was empty. She looked in the back to find Jane and Greer in the back chatting away. She couldn't help but feel a little jealous. There was a wee thought niggling the back of her mind. She had been left alone… again. She had always been able to count on Jane to sit passenger side up with her, and then someone else comes along into his life, and she is left to chauffer. Why couldn't someone come into her life for once? She got into the driver's seat with a sigh of remorse.

"What's wrong Lisbon?" Jane asked from the back, who was in the middle of showing Greer a magic trick.

"Nothing. Why would there be anything the matter with me? I'm perfectly fine."

"You're reply was defensive and you have a little line between your eyes, showing stress or resentment." Greer replied, taking both Jane an Lisbon by surprise.

"Excuse me?" Lisbon stated.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I sometimes forget. I kinda say things without thinking. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be rude." Greer bit her lip and sunk back into the seat.

"How did you do that?" Jane asked.

Greer hesitated.

"Well it was quite obvious. Her tone was uptight and you could visibly see the line?"

"True… but usually I'm the only one who can read Lisbon."

"Oh… I… I'm sorry." Greer stuttered.

"Hey! Don't be sorry! It was quite… remarkable."

"Could you please stop talking about me as if I'm not here?"

"Sorry" both Greer and Jane replied in sync. They smirked at each other.

"Good." Lisbon said scowling a little. "Put your seatbelts on. Time to leave."

Jane and Greer put their seatbelts on and Lisbon pulled out of the CBI parking lot. She was really starting to resent Greer a little. Who was she to show up out of nowhere and take all of Jane's attention away? Ok sure she looked like Jane, that was a plausible fact to believe her on, but he had no real proof that she was really related to him. Lisbon cared. She really didn't want to see him get hurt again. He had been through so much. The night that Jane had got his memory back after drowning, still haunts her to the day. She has never in her life seen a man so broken. When he opened the door and saw the deathly red face smiling at him, he hadn't been able to look at her. She had seen him swaying on the spot and had been able to hear the almost silent sobs escape from his mouth.

"I'm sorry" she had whispered.

She had continued to stare at him until he had leant forward and collapsed to the ground. His sobs no longer silent. Lisbon had walked over to where the broken man sat. She hadn't been a hundred percent sure what to do. In the end she bent down and pulled him close to her. He had howled into her shoulder for almost an hour. She had just sat there, rubbing his back, not noticing the tears that had been running down her own cheeks. They had never spoken of that night again, but Lisbon felt something stronger inside her, growing for Patrick Jane. Thinking about that night still made her chest ache a little.

A loud spluttering sound shook her out of her thoughts.

"Greer? Are you alright?" Lisbon could hear the concern in Patrick's voice. Greer seemed to be choking. "Lisbon! Pull over!"

"No! No I'm ok now." Greer said her voice a little raspy. She cleared her throat and coughed once more.

"What was that all about?" Lisbon asked, glancing into the back with her revision mirror.

"Oh… I just had something stuck. I'm ok though." Greer replied.

Patrick sighed with relief.

"Not cool."

Greer lay back against her seat closing her eyes.

Lisbon put her focus back on the road. That didn't sound like a normal cough. Ahh.. she probably has asthma or something.

"We're here." Lisbon said as she pulled into a park.


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N Here's the next chapter, I'm trying my best to keep everyone in character, but I am struggling with 'serious Jane'. So sorry if I get out of context a little. I would love to know what you all think!**

Lisbon still felt irritated, as she got out of the car at the crime scene. She could see Jane watching Greer's every move. She had only coughed! For all they knew, she could have a radio transmitter implanted in her throat and it had slipped. It could be possible? The cough hadn't sounded normal.

They approached the body and the rest of the team, stepping under the yellow tape.

"Greer, you're not actually allowed here, so stay out of the way… and don't touch anything!"

Greer nodded, falling into step with Jane, as Lisbon went on ahead.

"She doesn't like me very much." It wasn't a question.

"Why would you say that?" Jane asked her, looking after Lisbon.

"You're the one who said you can read her. You tell me."

They stopped walking.

"Look." Jane said, getting slightly defensive. He looked Greer directly in the eye. "She just cares about me. We're friends. It's what they do."

Greer sighed.

"I know. I get that. But it doesn't give her any reason to personally dislike me. I can feel the resentment coming off of her in waves."

"Just give her a break. She's stressed. Let it go." Jane said, his tone darkening.

"Oh… I… sorry."Greer bit her lip and looked at her feet.

"Hey, it's ok." Jane said looking into her face. "She's just done a lot for me. She's just trying to be a good boss and a good friend."

Greer nodded.

"Come on." Jane said motioning her towards the direction of the body. "Let's go solve a murder." He smiled dazzlingly at her.

She returned the smile―hers a little more guarded than his―and ventured towards him. Sure, she was _meant _to get to know Jane. She had been _told_ to. And the fact that she didn't have a lot of time to do so, was slightly frightening. She would be paying with her life once the time ran out. But that was inevitable. There was nothing she could do to stop it. With that epiphany, Greer tucked her thoughts to the back of her mind for later. She had more important things to do.

The victim, a woman of mid thirties, was lying outside the coffee shop, in a pool of her own blood. She was lying on her side and had a knife sticking out of her belly. There was a red bloody footprint beside her. Greer gasped when she saw the body. She had seen movies where people were murdered viciously, but it was so much harder seeing it firsthand. Once she got over the initial shock, her other senses kicked in.

"Name's Suzie Philips." Lisbon said. "Coroner says she has been dead since around one this morning."

Jane nodded and Lisbon walked away to talk to the local PD.

"Hmmm…" Greer murmured.

"What?" Patrick asked.

"I bet you ten bucks I can guess her occupation."

"Ha! You're on!"

Rigsby smiled, overhearing the bet. He had learned the hard way, Never. EVER. bet with Patrick Jane.

Lisbon sighed and rolled her eyes a little, watching them. This was surely going to be interesting.

Greer walked around, circling the body. She mmmed and ahhed a little before turning back to Patrick with a triumphant look on her face.

"Well?" he asked, having made his own analysis.

"She's a hairdresser."

"Oh yeah. And how do you come to that conclusion?" he asked, his eyes shining.

"Her hair is freshly cut, and yet her ends are split from overdying and heat damage. Her hair is dark, but she is covered with little snippets of blonde hair, and she has little cuts on her fingers, from where she has overcut and nipped the skin." She looked up from the body after finishing her report. Jane was positively beaming. Lisbon hadn't seen him so happy since he had lost his memory.

"Also," Greer continued. "she is recently divorced or is having an affair." She said pointing at the small white ring of skin on the victim's tanned finger. "And… the killer watched her die. You don't bleed when you're dead, so she would have had to be lying there long enough for the blood to pool around her, and the killer to step in it. Hence the footprint."

"Ah huh!" Jane's shouted and started clapping.

"Well, if she is his daughter," Rigsby said leaning towards Cho, "She has definitely gained his 'superpowers'"

Cho nodded. He had never seen anyone outsmart Patrick Jane. Even he was surprised, but no one would have noticed through his cool demeanour.

"Ten dollars thank you." Greer said, holding her hand out.

"Ahh. A deals a deal." Patrick said shrugging. He reached into his pants pocket and pulled out his wallet.

"Hold up on that Jane" Lisbon said walking towards them. She pulled out her cuffs and walked over to Greer.

"Greer Thompson, you are under arrest under suspicion of the murder of Suzie Philip." She said securing Greer's hands behind her back.

"Lisbon? What are you doing?" Patrick was staring wide eyed at her. "Lisbon?"

"You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do can and will be held against you in a court of law." Greer was frightened out of her mind. Her eyes were huge and swimming with tears. "You have the right to speak to an attorney." Lisbon continued. "If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you. Do you understand these rights as they have been read to you?"

"Lisbon!" Jane said again.

"Do you understand these rights as they have been read to you?" Lisbon repeated.

"Y-yes…" Greer stuttered back. She was staring helplessly at Jane.

"Lisbon! What are you doing! Answer me Lisbon or so help me…"

"She's too close to the case Jane. How else would she have known so much about the victim?"

"The same way I do! Through the art of human perception. Lisbon! Come on! She's done nothing wrong."

Lisbon looked at him as if he had gone mad. This girl had to be lying to him. How is it he couldn't see it?

"It's too late Jane. I've called it and I've already read her her rights. I'm taking her in."

Greer let out a sob. She coughed into her shoulder a couple of times, seeing as her hands were out of reach to stifle it.

"_There goes that bloody transmitter again." _Lisbon thought to herself.

"Cho. Run the knife for prints."

Cho nodded. His expression not betraying his true feelings.

"Lisb… TERESA!" Jane called. "Please. She's done nothing wrong!"

"Time to go." Lisbon said, completely ignoring Jane.


	5. Chapter 4

**A/N Here's the next chapter. I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas! **

Lisbon had been drinking. From what started as a relaxing drink after a hard day's work, had turned into cravings, a continuous desire. She had a constant headache, that pounded at her ears, making her slightly disorientated and off balance. The nausea that rattled at her stomach, caused her to vomit every time she tried to eat something. She felt paranoid all of the time. Paranoid that she wouldn't get her next drink in time, paranoid that someone on the team would find out. She knew she had a problem, she was starting to drink dangerous amounts and it scared her to death. She could lose her job. Hell, at this rate she could probably lose her life. Not that many people would notice. She was alone. And now this little bitch had come into Jane's life and tried to take him from her too.

They were sitting in the interrogation room, blinds pulled and door locked. She wanted to handle this one by herself. No interruptions from "Daddy". Lisbon was sitting at the table, head in her hands. God she had a headache. She looked up at suspect. She was sitting there blubbering like a five year old.

"Why are you doing this?" Greer sobbed.

"Because, you're too close to the case. You knew too much about her. No seventeen year old would be able to figure out that much, unless they already knew the victim… Or unless they killed them." She added as an afterthought.

"Look, Teresa―" Greer said wiping her eyes.

"That's Agent Lisbon to you thanks." Lisbon cut in.

"_Agent Lisbon._ I have no idea who that woman is. She is a hair dresser. I know that from markings on her body. Everything I said had a plausible explanation. I didn't kill her!" Greer took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. Her breath hitched and she broke into another coughing fit. After a few moments, she cleared her throat and took a slow breath.

"Are you alright?" Lisbon asked, her motherly instincts getting the better of her.

"Yes I'm fine." Greer wiped her eyes again. "I just had something stuck.."

"Good." Lisbon cleared her throat. She had a bad taste in her mouth from last night's drinking session. "Did you kill Suzie Phillip?"

"No!"

"Are you or are you not working for Red John?"

"Red who?"

"You don't know who Red John is?"

"Should I?"

"He killed Jane's wife and child."

"Oh." Greer looked down at her hands. A single tear fell from her face. "I didn't know."

"Red John is a serial killer. We've been hunting him for a few years now…"

"..and you think I may be working for him." Greer finished.

"It had crossed our minds yes. It would be the perfect way for Red John to get close to Patrick."

"Look if you don't believe me, then order a paternity test!"

"We might just do that. It will give all of us some peace of mind." Lisbon made a mental note to order the test. She then carried on with the interview. "Where were you last night?"

"On a plane. Flying here from Michigan."

Lisbon looked at the two way glass. A subtle sign for Cho to check if her alibi could be vouched for.

"How is it you know so much about her?" Lisbon asked again.

"I've already told you! I'm able to figure things out by markings on her body. I put all the information together and from there it was just a matter of guess work."

"You're seventeen."

"Yes. And I've seen a lot. From a young age, it has been one of my gifts to be able to train my mind, remember everything I see, or read, or hear… my mother said I get it from my father." Greer looked at her hands again. "Why do you hate me so much?" she asked quietly.

Lisbon sighed. She felt defeated. This girl was innocent. She could see it in her eyes, and she was more interested in making sure she didn't hate her, then defending herself against murder charges. Lisbon needed a drink.

"It's not that I hate you. I just really worry about Jane. He's the closest thing I have to a best friend. As you've just found out, he has been through so much, I can't even begin to comprehend how he feels. If you really are his daughter, tread carefully with him. Treat him gently, because he has already lost his family once, I would hate to see him lose it again."

Greer looked down at her hands guiltily.

"Is there something you would like to share?"

"I'm not sure I should. At least not until the paternity test comes back and I know I can trust you."

"As an Agent of the law, everything you say will be held in confidence."

"And as a seventeen year old with personal interest to one of your friends, anything you hear can be passed on to anyone of your Agents. This would need to stay between us. And I need to know that I can trust you, in a personal way, not in a locked room sort of way."

There was a knock at the door. Lisbon got up and went out to talk to Cho.

"Alibi checks out boss. She was on the plane when the murder took place. Also the prints on the knife, belonged to one Joseph Harkins."

"Ok thanks Cho. Hey I need you to do something." She said her voice lowering to a whisper.

"Yip?"

"Order a paternity test. I still need to make sure she isn't working for Red John."

"On it boss."

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Jane was being held hostage on his couch. Van Pelt had him sitting with his cup of tea, threatening to taser him if he tried to move. Since Greer had been arrested he had had this dull ache in his chest. What if she really was a murderer? What if she wasn't his daughter? She looked so much like him. She had put on such a convincing act. He set his tea on the floor and put his head in his hands, no longer being able to compose himself. His body shuddered with his silent sobs. Tears for his wife. Tears for his poor daughter. And tears for this lovely girl who had come into his life, and changed it in an instant.

Grace looked up from her paperwork. This wasn't the first time she had seen Patrick Jane cry. Last time she had shut the door and left him to compose himself, but this time, she couldn't just leave him crying right in front of her.

Silently and cautiously she got up and went and sat by him. She patted him on the back, making soothing noises. Patrick kept crying. Each wave of grief ripping his chest apart. He felt as if he was breaking from the inside out. All Grace wanted to do was take him in her arms and rock him. It made her heart ache to see the notorious and sarcastic Patrick Jane breaking down in front of her. She heard him take a couple of deep breaths. He didn't lift his face out of his hands.

"Grace…"

She got up, understanding what he wanted, and came back with a box of tissues. He wiped his face and blew his nose. He cleared his throat and looked up at her.

"Thanks."

She patted his shoulder, nodded once. She then got up and sat back at her desk.

Jane felt sick to his stomach. He got up and went to the men's room. He stood in front of the basin and looked in the mirror. He looked a wreck. His eyes were all red and puffy. He was pale and in desperate need of a shave. Jane turned on the forcet and splashed his face with cold water. Nausea rolled through his belly. He felt the bile rise. Jane bent over and violently threw up in the sink.

"Uh." He grunted. He rinsed his mouth out with water and sat on the floor, leaning his head against the wall. He closed his eyes. He was a complete and utter mess. He wasn't sure how long he sat there until he heard a knock at the door.

"Jane? You in there?"

It was Lisbon.

"Yeah, I'll be right out."

"Are you ok?"

He didn't answer. She was half the reason he was in this state. He was so confused, he hated being confused. It clouded his judgment, made him feel vulnerable. Jane got up, resting heavily on the basin. He quickly splashed his face with cold water again before he made his way to the door, where Lisbon was waiting for him.

"You look terrible."

"Thank you." He said, his usual wit absent from his voice.

"Jane. She's innocent. Her alibi came through and the prints on the knife don't belong to her."

Jane only nodded.

"Can I see her?"

"She's requested a paternity test. I already have her sample. I need a swab from the inside of your mouth."

Jane nodded again.

"You'll find out in three days whether she's your daughter or not."

"Are you done?"

"Yes… Jane?"

"I'm fine."

"I'm sorry!"

Jane walked away, back to his couch, leaving Lisbon staring sadly after him. She had done this for him after all! Is this really what she gets for trying to look out for him?

Raged and upset, Lisbon stormed into her office, locking her door and pulling the blinds. She reached into the bottom draw of her desk, pulling out the new bottle of vodka and shot glass. She filled the glass to the rim, before tipping her head back and letting the liquid burn her throat, right down to where it settled in her uneasy stomach. She felt the warmth spread. Filling the glass again, she took another shot. She was starting to feel a little more relaxed. She reached for the bottle again, this time not bothering to use the glass.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Greer had been moved to a holding room upstairs. It was equipped with a small bed and bedside table. In the corner of the room there was a small table, with a single chair. Rather gloomy. She wasn't allowed to see Patrick again until the tests came back. This had completely disheartened her when she had found this out. She didn't have a lot of time left. But she sighed in relief, knowing her secret was safe for a little while longer, because once it was out in the open… everything would change, there would be no going back.

**A/N Please review =]**


	6. Chapter 5

**A/N ok so I tried to make this chapter a little lighter… it doesn't move the plotline along very far but I think the character interactions were needed. Enjoy =]**

The next morning, Jane woke up from a restless sleep on his couch, with a sense of dread at the back of his mind. He missed his friend. He didn't like that they weren't ok at the moment. This needed fixing. Aside from himself, the bullpen was empty and he hadn't heard Lisbon leave last night. He got up, walked over to her office door and knocked quietly. No answer.

"Lisbon?" He called, knocking again.

Still no answer.

He reached out and tried the door. Locked.

"Hmm." He pulled a wire out of his pocket and quickly picked the lock. He opened the door to find Lisbon sitting at her desk, head in her hands, seemingly asleep. He walked over to her and gently started shaking her. "Lisbon?" he whispered.

She groaned groggily as her eyes fluttered open. It was then that Jane took in his surroundings. A half empty bottle of vodka lay on her desk, the glass, long forgotten, had rolled to the floor. There was a strong acidic smell swirling around the room, to which Jane located the puke in Lisbon's trashcan. It was then, he realised, she had drunk herself into a stupor and passed out sometime during the night.

"Oh, Lisbon. What have you done to yourself?" He kneeled to the ground so he was face to face with her. Looking into her eyes he could see her internal struggle. She was trying to hard not to cry in front of him. She wouldn't look at him. He realised then that it was his fault. He had driven her to purposely harm herself, when she had only been trying to help. "Lisbon, I'm so sorry. You were only trying to help… and I…" he broke off, looking at his feet. How is it that Greer had captivated him so entirely in such a small amount of time? He trusted Lisbon with his life. So why hadn't he trusted her with her judgements?

"Jane?" Lisbon whispered, lifting her head off the table. She shut her eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose with her thumb and forefinger.

"Yes? What is it?"

"My head. Painkillers?"

"On it." He got up and made his way toward the kitchen. Opening the cupboard he found the bottle of Tylenol, he grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge, then made his way back to Lisbon. "Here." He said handing them over.

"Thanks." She couldn't look him in the eye. If she did, all would be forgiven, and she wasn't quite finished feeling angry with him. She popped a couple of pills into her mouth and downed half of the bottled water.

"Lisbon. I'm sorry. You had your reasons, and even if I didn't agree with them I shouldn't have treated you so harshly. I wouldn't have had the guts to get a paternity test without you initiating it. I sent my specimen to the lab… I know now that everything you've done… you've just been trying to protect me… I really am sorry." He sat on Lisbon's desk, trying to read her emotions.

"I know you are Jane. I was only trying to help… but I was being stupid. I just…"

"You missed me." Jane said cutting in.

"What… I… No! Don't be stupid."

Jane leant forward and put a hand gently on her shoulder.

"Hey it's ok. I get it. We're… partners. We have each other's back. And Greer showing up out of the blue… well I didn't think. I was so caught up on the possibility of having a family again, that I forgot I already had one."

It was then that Lisbon looked at Jane. She felt her stomach drop and she knew all was forgiven. They were both being stupid.

"I'm sorry too Jane. Ever since the night you got your memory back…" she paused making sure she wasn't treading waters she wouldn't be able to get out of. Seeing only a small flicker of remembrance in his eyes, she continued. "I've sort of felt protective of you." She was really starting to open up now. "I just don't want to see you get hurt. If this girl isn't your daughter… just know I'm here for you if you need to talk. Either way I know it's going to be hard for you adjust."

Jane smiled at her. He held out his right hand.

"Friends?"

Lisbon returned the smile, taking his hand in hers.

"Friends."

Both Jane and Lisbon felt as if a weight had been lifted off of their shoulders.

Jane stood up from the desk and made his way to Lisbon's couch. He patted the empty space beside him and Lisbon made her way over, plonking herself down beside him. She was starting to feel a little better.

"How long?" Jane asked.

"Sorry?"

"How long have you been drinking like this?"

Lisbon internally kicked herself. Of course he knew. Why would he think it was just a one shot when the vodka was already in her office. He had probably noticed she was paler than usual and she had lost weight, due to the lack of being able to keep food down. He was Jane. She sighed in defeat.

"Just after Bosco died."

Jane looked at her, slightly shocked. He knew she had been drinking, but he hadn't known how long it had been going on for.

"Lisbon…"

"Look I know! I've tried to stop… but I just can't." She was defeated. She decided that while they were sitting on this couch as friends rather than colleagues, she could open up a little more. "After my mom was killed, my father started drinking. I hated him for it at the time… sometimes he would drink so much, he would suffer fits of rage… and beat me and my brothers." Her voice was growing smaller with each word. She looked at Jane who gave her a supportive smile. He had her talking, and he wanted nothing more than for her to continue. "Anyway, as I said, I hated him for it at the time, but after Bosco died, and I started drinking, I started to relate to him more. I actually started to understand my father. I even began to forgive him. Drinking makes the pain go away. It makes me numb… it makes me forget."

"It's making you sick Teresa." He had decided to use her first name seeing as this was a personal matter. "You need help."

"I know I need to stop. At this rate I could lose my job. My liver probably hates me."

"I'm sure it does." Jane said with a slight chuckle, trying to lighten the mood a little. "I'm worried about you. Even before Greer came, I noticed something was off with you. What's going on? You can tell me." He smiled at her warmly, trying to encourage her to open up again.

"I'm ok. It's just…" She paused, unable to continue.

"Lisbon, remember that day I told you I would always be there for you? The day we did the trust fall?"

She nodded, remembering how he had made her turn around and let him catch her.

"I meant what I said, you can trust me Lisbon."

"I…" she sighed, resigned. "I guess I'm just sick of being alone."

"You're not alone Lisbon. You have friends here at the CBI. You have your brothers. Then there's Walter" she blushed slightly at the mention of the man she had slept with. "And then of course there's me. Whatever happens Lisbon, whenever you need me, I'll be there. Even if you're on the other side of the world, I'd get there just to help you." He looked into her eyes, making sure she knew he was serious. "You don't need to feel alone. The next time you feel like drinking, call me. Drive to my house. I'm going to be there to help you get through this."

"Thanks Patrick." She blinked, trying to restrain the tears that were threatening to spill over. He really was a sweet man. She would have loved to have met him before… well before Red John. When he wasn't so broken.

"And Lisbon?"

"Mmm?"

"Thanks for the other night… at my house. I'm sorry you had to see me like that." He said as if he knew what she was thinking.

"I'll always be there for you too."

He nodded, silent.

"Hey there's something I need to do… you mind making me some coffee?" Lisbon asked in hope of distraction her consultant.

"Ahh… sure." His blue eyes looked slightly confused, but he didn't push her.

"Thanks. I won't be long"

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Greer was lying on her bed, reading a book when she heard a light knock at her door.

"Come in." she called, not looking up to see who it was. She felt like she was being held captive. She hadn't done anything wrong. Maybe it was a mistake her coming here. She was sneaky enough she could escape from this shoebox of a place. She could send someone here later on to do her bidding, say what needed to be said. But there really was only one thing keeping her here. Fear of regret.

Lisbon made her way cautiously into the room. She was almost surprised to see that the girl was still here. She really did look a lot like Jane. So if she was his daughter, why hadn't she figured out a way to escape yet?

"Hi." Lisbon said uneasily.

"Hi" Greer said looking up from her book when she realised who her visitor was.

"Look Greer…"

"Yeah I know. You're sorry"

"How… and why does everybody keep doing that?"

"Doing what?" Greer asked sitting up, a little confused.

"Everyone keeps finishing my sentences. Well not everyone.. you and Jane."

"Oh… I'm sorry."

Lisbon took a seat at the single chair next to the little table.

"You're not the one who should be saying sorry. I know you think you know that I'm sorry, but I don't think you realise how much. I was wrong to jump to conclusions so fast. Jane does that all the time… analyses the murder victims to find out more about them." She added, seeing Greer's confused stare. "I guess I resented you a little."

"Resented me? Why would you resent me? I'm nothing but a stupid little girl trying to find her father. It was a hopeless mission from the start. Either I wasn't going to find him… or I was just going to cause trouble and interrupt his life."

"You just seem to understand him. I've known him for a few years now. I've read his file. We're meant to be friends but I just can't seem to figure him out. He's a closed book."

"Maybe your just reading the wrong pages."

Lisbon smiled at the girl.

"Maybe I am."

"Agent Lisbon?"

"Um… you can call me Teresa if you want to… sorry about the formalities earlier."

"Ah, ok. Teresa… when can I see Patrick again?"

Lisbon sighed and looked at her feet.

"I still don't think it would be a great idea for you to see him again until the results come back. I'm sorry."

"You're just looking out for a friend I guess."

"Yeah… that's exactly what I'm doing. It's nothing personal."

"Anymore…" Greer said smiling again.

Lisbon smirked. She got up to leave.

"Teresa?"

"Yes Greer?"

"Tell Patrick I say hi, and whatever happens, he's not obliged to do anything. I don't expect anything from him, I only wanted to meet him."

Lisbon shifted uncomfortably.

"Ok, I'll tell him."

Before Greer could say another word, Lisbon stepped out of the room. She felt as if a weight had been lifted off of her shoulders, but at the same time she felt remorse creeping into her bones. She had been horrible to this girl. What if she really was Jane's daughter? She had been rude to her from the get go. Hell, she had bloody arrested her. Jane may be able to forgive her, but she was never going to be able to forgive herself.


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N I hope you all had a great new years... this chapter is rather Greerless, but she will come in more in the next couple of chapters.**

**R and R =]**

Van Pelt, Rigsby and Cho were sitting at a table in the one of the biggest houses they had ever seen. They were there to talk to the ex husband of the victim, Randall Phillips. Cho sat there staring at Randall, his face completely expressionless. Van Pelt was warming her hands on the outside of her coffee mug, while Rigsby bit into the sandwich the cook had prepared for him.

"Oh! This is good! Thanks."

Van Pelt rolled her eyes and looked at Randall.

"Mr Philip, I'm sorry about your loss, but we had to come and ask you a few questions, in order for us to find out who killed your wife."

Randall looked up, anger penetrated his face.

"She is not my wife.. was.. she was not my wife. She lost the right to that title when the bitch cheated on me."

Van Pelt looked down at her cup, she wasn't sure she really wanted to have this conversation.

"Where were you Tuesday night?" Cho asked when Van Pelt hesitated.

Randall sighed and sat down.

"I was here, reading a book. No one can vouch for me. I let my staff have the night off. I needed to be alone." Randall hung his head, looking at a knot in the wooded table.

"So no one can vouch for you?"

Randall shook his head.

"Did you kill Suzie Philip?" Cho asked, sitting forward. It was a subtle move he had learnt from Lisbon, it scared the suspect to hell.

"What? No! I would never!"

"But she cheated on you." Cho said in his monotone-like voice. "That must have made you angry."

"But I didn't kill her! Yes she cheated on me, but I still loved her. I was angry, but I would never hurt her. I couldn't have."

"Anger can make a man blind."

"I didn't kill her! This is a massive accusation!" Randall stood up and pounded his fist on the table. He hung his head again, trying to compose himself. "I couldn't have, even if I wanted to. She- she was pregnant…"

"But the baby wasn't yours." Cho stated, relaxing back into his chair when he realised Randall wasn't posing any threat.

"N-no. I can't have kids. She came home, and told me she was pregnant. I thought that by some miracle we had finally gotten pregnant. But no. She had been screwing around with some gang member. I don't know why. She had a nice home. I gave her a nice life! She had security. But it was just never enough."

"Do you know the name of the gang member?" Rigsby asked, he had finished his sandwich, so he thought it would be a good time to involve himself in the conversation.

"Someone Harkins? The man's dangerous."

"Joseph Harkins?" Grace asked.

Randall nodded.

"Yeah, Joe Harkins, that sounds about right."

"When you said dangerous… what exactly did you mean?"

"He's part of a gang for crying out loud! I really don't know what Suzie saw in him. She said he had a gun, said he showed her how to use it. She told me he was exciting."

"Well there you go then." Cho said. "Maybe you offered her a little too much security."

"What?"

The agents got up, getting ready to leave.

"What do you mean I gave her too much security?"

"Thank you for your time Mr Philip. We will contact you if we find anything else out."

Grace was the first out the door, and the first on her cell. If the man was armed, she needed to tell Jane and Lisbon. She also needed to update them on the victims pregnancy.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Jane and Lisbon arrived at Joseph Harkins' house just after twelve noon. His prints had been found on the knife and Lisbon thought she was going there for an easy arrest. Jane on the other hand, thought different.

"He didn't do it."

"Jane, his prints were found on the murder weapon. What more evidence do you need?"

They had got out of the SUV and were making their way towards the front door. They slowed, so they could finish their conversation before entering.

"Well, my dear Lisbon, _your _prints were found on the magazine of a murder weapon. _You _didn't do it."

"Yeah. But-"

"It was a crime of passion Lisbon. She obviously irked someone enough for them to kill her, they stood there and watched her die, and from the way the footprint was set, they had been kneeling beside her. Ergo, the killer was either trying to comfort her-feeling remorseful, or wanted to watch the light leave her eyes."

"And that doesn't suit our guy because?" Lisbon asked, rolling her eyes. It was a Jane hunch, and he wouldn't stop until he could prove himself right.

"Look around you, we're in the middle of nowhere. I would almost guarantee if I stood on the corner by myself, I would get mugged before the hour was over. No, killings that go on around these areas are not crimes of passion, they are quick, to the point. Usually about drugs or money, payoffs and such. Our killing was a crime with depth."

They had just reached the front door.

"Well I guess we'll soon find out." She knocked on the door three times. "Open up! CBI!" She knocked again.

"Yeah.. I'm comin', I'm comin'."

There was a click as he unlocked the door, then the man stepped outside. Lisbon looked the man up and down, taking in his scruffy attire. She avoided breathing through her nose, thinking she would regret it if she did.

"Are you Joseph Harkins?" She asked, unconsciously taking a step in front of Jane. This man looked dodgy, and Jane being Jane, who didn't know how to defend himself, would probably be the one to pay for it.

"Who wants to know?" the man huffed.

"I'm Agent Teresa Lisbon, CBI and this is Patrick Jane, our consultant."

"CBwhata?" the man asked.

Lisbon sighed. She went through this process with almost every suspect.

"California Beuro of Investigations. We're here to investigate the murder of Suzie Philip."

"Suzie's dead?" He looked down at his feet. "When? How?"

"She was stabbed the night before last. Mr Harkins, may we come in?"

"Ahh sure." he said standing aside to let them enter.

Joe led them into a small messy room that they took to be the living room. Jane brushed the couch with his hand, trying to clean it somewhat, before taking a seat. Lisbon, on the other hand, remained standing.

"Joseph wh-"

"Joe." Joe said cutting her off.

"Fine. Joe. Where were you Tuesday night." Lisbon asked. She was a little pissed off for being interrupted and the smell of the place was doing nothing to help her headache. She didn't drink last night, thanks to Jane's distractions, but she could already feel the withdrawals.

"You're really asking me this? I only found out a couple of moments ago that she was murdered. What the hell would you need to ask me where I was if I didn't know!"

" Protocol." She answered smoothly. "Are you gonna tell us now? the easy way? Or are we going to have to take you downtown?"

Joe flicked her a dirty look.

"I was out. With the boys."

"You wana elaborate on that a little?"

"We went to a few bars, got drunk walked around a bit, came back here, and pretty much slept where we dropped. I don't remember a whole lot about that night." He chuckled a little. "It's kind of cool what alcohol can do to the mind."

Lisbon shuddered. It was not _cool_. She had been drinking excessively for a long time now, and even the thought of drinking right now, was making her stomach turn.

"So you don't remember what you did that night" Jane cut in.

"Nah not really" Joe replied, leaning against the wall and putting his hands in his oversized pants pockets.

"So you could have killed her, without even knowing about it?" Lisbon asked.

"I think I would remember something like that." Joe said, his voice taking a defensive tone.

Lisbon stood there, staring at the man, sizing him up in case he decided to try something. The silence was broken by her phone ringing.

"Lisbon." She answered, walking into the other room to take the call.

While Lisbon was talking on the phone, Jane took his opportunity to talk to the man by himself.

"What was you relationship with Mrs Philip?" he asked him, watching Joe size him up.

"We saw each other a couple of times, had a few laughs.."

"But she was a married woman. Why is it she took your interest so much?"

"She said she was unhappy. I wasn't going to deny a willing lady a good time."

Jane sat back in his seat, suddenly very tired. This was starting to remind him of his fling with Tracy. They had been friends, partners in his act. He would do psychic readings on her in public places to draw the crowd's attention, get them believing. He would tell her that she needn't be afraid, that her mother was happy and she was watching over her. Tracy would sob and thank him, telling him he was amazing. The crowd, now immersed in their act, would turn to believers, and Patrick would be able to "sniff" out his next client, through the hope that filled their eyes.

One night after they had had too many drinks, they'd found themselves back in the hotel room, the atmosphere light, but spicy. Neither of them could really register what they were doing, and neither cared. It wasn't until Jane woke up the next morning, the bed empty next to him, that he realised he had lost his best friend. He never saw her again and he never knew why she left him so abruptly.

Lisbon walked back into the room, snapping Jane out of his reverie. Joe was still leaning against the wall, watching Jane.

"She was pregnant. Did you know that Joe?" Lisbon stated as Joe's head snapped up to look at her.

"Pregnant?"

"You were having a relationship with a married woman Joe. That can't have gained either of you many friends. Her husband's sterile. The baby was yours."

"What? Oh shit!"

"Joe, we found your fingerprints on the murder weapon."

"I didn't kill her! I would never have hurt her. Besides, I would have worn gloves. "

"Look, unless you can give us any valid information as to how your prints are on the knife, we are going to have to take you in."

"I wouldn't have used a knife. I would have used a gun. Quick kill. None of that slow torture stuff."

Jane caught Lisbon's eye with an 'I told you so' look on his face. Lisbon sighed.

"We have enough to bring you in Joe, you know that."

"I didn't kill her! Check out my alibi! I wasn't even in that area." Joe huffed. "What ever happened to innocent until proven guilty." He mumbled.

"Fine." Lisbon breathed. "I'll check your alibi, we'll be back tomorrow."

Joe gave Lisbon the names and they got up to leave.

"Don't leave town." Jane said as he walked past him, towards the door.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Once outside, Lisbon breathed a sigh of relief. It was getting late and they still had a long drive back to the CBI. God she really needed a drink. She could almost feel the pull of the addiction, seeping through her veins. Her stomach gurgled in response, sending little waves of nausea sweeping through her body.

"Let's go get ice cream!" Jane said, rubbing his hands together at the idea.

"Jane, it's a long drive and I really want to get back to check his alibi."

"Oh, come on Lisbon! It'll be fun."

He was trying to distract her.

"Jane, please, I'm not actually feeling too well. I want to get back so I can go home and go to bed."

Jane pouted.

She sighed.

"Tomorrow. Ok?"

He smiled a little.

"Ooookaaay." He said drawing the word out like a defeated toddler.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

The rest of the ride back was mostly silent. Lisbon was focusing on keeping her stomach in check and fantasizing about the little bottle she had hidden in her office. She would just have one drink to settle her stomach. She would check the alibi and then go home to bed.

They arrived at the CBI and Lisbon said goodnight to Jane, hoping to shake him off fast. But when they got to her office, he followed her in and plonked himself down on her couch.

"Jane? What are you doing?"

"Oh, I like this couch better today."

"Jane." Lisbon said sternly. "What do you want?"

"Please Lisbon. I'm bored."

"I have work to do. And I don't need a babysitter!"

"Oh, come now Lisbon, you won't even know I'm here." He emphasised his statement by laying back and closing his eyes. Lisbon sighed. She really wasn't going to get away from him. Damn she needed a drink. But instead she sat down at her desk and looked at the list of names Joe had given her. Picking one at random, she called the number, to see if Joe could, in fact, be innocent.


	8. Chapter 7

**A/N Lisbon is going to have a few issues this chapter, so I'm sorry if you don't like me being mean to her… maybe some Jisbon would cheer you up? =]**

Lisbon didn't want to get out of bed. Her alarm had gone off ten minutes ago, but she hadn't been able to will herself to get up. This was the second night in a row she hadn't been able to have a drink. Jane had hung around until well past midnight, keeping a possessive eye on her. She couldn't have had a drink when she got home either, she was that close to falling asleep at the wheel on her way home, she knew that bed was the best thing for her.

Joe's alibi's had checked out, she had even managed to ring a couple of the bars they had been at, the keeper confirming Joe and his gang had been there. Her withdrawal symptoms had gotten worse. She was still lying down, knowing that if she sat up, small dizzying dots would pop in front of her eyes, and her stomach would roll dangerously. Today was going to be a very long day.

She lay there a little longer, thinking about calling in sick. But she knew if she did, she would have Jane on her case. He would probably show up at her door, demanding she let him in. She sighed, staring up at the ceiling.

_If I get out of bed slowly, maybe nothing will happen..? _ She thought to herself. Gently, she raised her head off the pillow and sat up. Wrong move. The small movement had her clasping a hand to her mouth and running for the bathroom. She only made it to the bathroom sink before she bent over and started heaving.

_Ugh._ She collapsed to the ground and leant against the bath.

"This is worse than a fricken hangover." She moaned to herself.

She crawled over to the shower, turning the hot water on, but staying on the floor, letting the water run onto her shaking body. Having a slightly shorter shower than usual- seeing as she was already late, she got out and shrugged some clothes on. She shoved her hair in a ponytail, before applying a quick layer of mascara.

She looked at her appearance and sighed. Jane was going to have a field day. She could already see him badgering her, not leaving her alone. She would try to shake him off, but that would only make him more persistent.

She grabbed a quick coffee, hoping the caffeine fix would help stop the shakes. While waiting for the water to boil, she downed a couple of Tylenol, trying to ease the pounding in her head. She poured the coffee into a takeout mug and headed out the door, breakfast the last thing on her mind. She got into her car and gave her apartment a regretful look. This was going to be a very long day.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Lisbon still managed to arrive at the bullpen before everyone else― excluding Jane.

_Damn! _ She swore to herself. The one person she was hoping to avoid. He was lying on his couch, his eyes closed… _hopefully he's still asleep…_

"Morning Lisbon!" Jane said cheerfully. He sat up and looked at her, a large smile plastered on his face. His smile faltered when he saw her properly. "Well, aren't you a sight for sore eyes." He said, earning himself a dirty look.

Lisbon walked off towards her office, intending on locking her door, but Jane was too fast. With a hop and a skip he was blocking her entrance.

"Jaaane. Please move." She complained. She couldn't be bothered with him right now. "Don't make me hurt you!" She warned when he didn't move. She felt instantly bad for being so harsh, when his eyes softened.

"How are you coping Lisbon? This can't be easy on you."

"I'm fine. I'm just a little tired."

"You said you weren't feeling well yesterday, and your really quite pale today."

She could see that he was genuinely concerned about her. There wasn't a single drop of sarcasm in his voice.

"Ok…" she said giving in. "I have a headache, and a stomach-ache, and I am very tired. I can't sleep properly, I keep having bad dreams." She felt vulnerable.

"Lisbon. They're all symptoms of alcohol withdrawal. You're body is going through some pretty dramatic cravings. Your starving it from the alcohol and that's what's making you feel so low. Have you been sick?" he asked rather tentatively. He had to be careful with this kind of situation. She trusted him, and he didn't want to overstep the boundary.

She looked at the floor.

"Ah… yeah. When I… when I got up this morning."

He could see that she was nervous. Her eyes kept shifting around and she kept changing her weight distribution.

"I know this is hard for you, but you just need to keep at it. It will get easier eventually. And until then, I'm here for moral support or a shoulder to lean on."

"Ah, thanks Jane. Um.. I have work to do.. so.."

"Oh." Jane said moving aside to let her into her office.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

They had hit a dead end with the case. Most of Lisbon's morning had been filled with paperwork. As far as she was concerned, Joe Harkins had an airtight alibi, which had put Lisbon at a setback― she really had thought he had been good for it.

Her headache was somewhat stifled from the many painkillers she had taken, but the nausea still crept through her unfed body. She hadn't eaten since breakfast yesterday and her body was really starting to notice the absence of energy. She sighed. She didn't have time to feel sorry for herself, she had a murder to solve. Making sure her emotions were in check, she grabbed a couple of files, and made her way back into the bullpen.

Everyone was all crowded around Jane. Lisbon inwardly sighed. She didn't need this today! She couldn't cope with Jane's tricks at the moment. But as she got closer, it wasn't looks of joy on their faces, but looks of anger, and concern. Jane was speaking in an angry whisper, he looked distressed. He looked up and saw her standing there, and automatically stopped talking.

"What's going on?" Lisbon asked, a little confused.

"Ah, nothing Boss." Van Pelt answered, a little too quickly.

"Oh. Is that right? Because to me it doesn't look like nothing." She folded her arms and glared at her team.

"We were just discussing the case Boss." Van Pelt tried again, in that same unsure voice.

"The case my arse." Lisbon held her hands up over her eyes. "Look, I don't care. Cho, Rigsby, go to the victims workplace, talk to some of her clients and colleagues, see if you can find out any useful information. Jane, we're going to talk to the husband again. Van Pelt, seeing as you can't tell me the truth, you can stay here on desk duty." Grace flinched like she had just been slapped at Lisbon's harsh words. She lowered her head.

"Yes Boss." She said quietly.

Lisbon immediately felt bad when she finished speaking, the girl was only trying to cover for the rest of the team, Jane especially by the look of it. _Damn, _she would have to apologize to her later.

"Jane, come on."

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

The beginning of the car ride was silent. They had driven for about ten minutes, before Lisbon decided to speak.

"Jane?"

"Mmm?" he replied. He knew where this was going.

"What were you guys talking about in the bullpen?" she asked a little tentatively. She closed her eyes readying herself for the words she didn't want to hear. _I thought it was best the team knew you had a problem. They have a right to know. _ Etcetera, etcetera. She felt sick at the thought of her team knowing she had a weakness. She's their boss! She doesn't need to be babysat.

After a few moments, when Jane still hadn't answered, she tried again.

"Jane?"

"Lisbon, please don't be angry with me."

_Here we go…_

"I was asking them if they knew where you were keeping Greer. I wanted to go and see her."

"Oh." Was all Lisbon could reply with. She felt the sinking feeling of relief floating through her, but at the same time, felt the anger of betrayal. "And what did they tell you?" she asked in a small voice. All she was trying to do was protect Jane until they knew what was going on with the girl.

"They wouldn't tell me. It's ok Lisbon, all loyalties lie with you."

She could hear the disappointment in his voice.

"Jane, I've been to see her since the arrest. She's in a safe place. She hasn't left yet― which I know she's fully capable of doing, she's ok."

"You've been to see her?" Jane asked in disbelief.

"Yeah, the first night you confronted me about my drinking."

"Why is it, you're allowed to see her, but I'm not? Lisbon. This may be my only chance!"

"Your only chance to what Jane?"

He looked down and shook his head. She looked away from the road, just in time to see a small tear roll down his face. She turned her head away quickly, slightly embarrassed that she had seen this moment of weakness from him.

"Jane, I went there to apologize to her." He looked up at her, surprise clearly splayed across his face. "I just told her I jumped to conclusions too fast. She seemed to be ok with me."

He answered her with a single nod.

"Jane.. it's just one more day. Please. Just hold off until the result come back."

"What difference is it going to make Lisbon? I still would have missed this time with her either way. I could be getting to know her, but your keeping her from me. It's like your jealous or something!" he growled.

Now it was Lisbon's turn for tears. Again, he was saying things she knew he was going to regret, but that didn't make it hurt any less.

"Jane, if she's not your daughter, there has to be a reason for her to come here. My guess is she's working for Red John."

"And if she is my daughter? Then you've just wasted three days of valuable time. Time that I won't get back."

Lisbon leant back against the driver's seat, leaning her head against the headrest. She blew a lungful of air out slowly, trying to ease the nausea that had made itself present again.

"I'm sorry Lisbon, you're not feeling well. We can talk about this later." Jane said, dismissing the subject for the time being. He knew she was feeling terrible, from the alcohol withdrawals, and about Greer. And he wasn't exactly helping her. She was just trying to protect him.

M_an I'm an arse. _He thought to himself.

"Lisbon?" he said, breaking the uncomfortable silence.

"What Jane?"

"Do you still think I'm pretty?"

She turned and looked at him. He was staring at her with the most ridiculous puppy dog face. She couldn't help be chuckle a little.

"Jaane!" she complained. But they both knew they were going to be ok. It was moments like these that they would have stopped speaking years ago, but each time they happened, their friendship seemed to grow a little stronger.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

They arrived at Randall Philip's manor, to have one of the housekeepers answer the door.

"Can I help you?" the old woman asked in a husky voice.

"Agent Teresa Lisbon, CBI" Lisbon said flashing her badge. "We're here to speak to Mr Philip. We have a few more questions for him."

"Oh, I'm afraid Mr Philip isn't here right now, he had a few matters to deal with at one of his other residencies."

"Could we have the address please?" Lisbon asked.

"Oh, well I would tell you if I knew. He didn't say which one he was going to."

Lisbon sighed. Nothing could ever be simple.

"Ok, Mrs…?"

"Barker." The old lady replied.

"Mrs Barker, how many properties does Mr Philip own?"

"Ahh, four in this area, and three more in other parts of the world… that I know of anyway."

Lisbon inwardly groaned. He could be anywhere.

"Thank you for your time."

They stepped back down to the waiting SUV, Lisbon pulled out her cell phone.

"Van Pelt, I need you to send me a list of addresses of the properties Randall Philip owns."

"Yes Boss, sending them through to you now."

"Thanks. Oh and Van Pelt. I'm sorry about the way I treated you earlier. You were just trying to protect Jane."

"I was out of line Boss, I shouldn't have lied to you."

"No, lying will not be tolerated in this team, but seeing as this was a personal matter, I'll let it slide this time… but make sure it doesn't happen again."

"Yes Boss."

Lisbon hung up the phone.

"Come on Jane. Time to go."

"Ah, Lisbon."

"What Jane?"

"Yesterday you said we could get ice cream."

"Jaaane!"

"Come now, you just told Grace that lying will not be tolerated, and breaking a promise is as good as lying." He looked at her, flashing his pearly whites into a massive smile.

"Damn."

His smile widened, knowing he had won.

"It'll be good for you, I'm sure you haven't eaten yet."

"Really? You really want to get ice cream now?"

"Yup." He grinned. "Come on.. you can get a milkshake or something if you don't want ice cream."

"Fine" she said defeated.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

They ordered what they wanted― Jane a mango swirl, double scoop, and Lisbon a chocolate milkshake, and made their way over to the little park across the road. They sat down on a park bench.

"Lisbon, why didn't you come to me when you knew you had a problem? I could have helped you."

Lisbon stuck the straw in her mouth and suck in some of the chocolaty goodness. She sighed.

"I guess, I just didn't want anyone to see me vulnerable. I'm the boss, I'm not meant to break down, or have a problem." She took another pull at her milkshake.

"But Lisbon, you've seen me at my most vulnerable. I cried in your arms like a baby." Lisbon flinched at the memory. "You should have come to me. I'm your friend."

"I'm sorry Jane. I guess I just got so used to taking care of myself. I've never really had someone I can rely on. I didn't even think about asking for your help."

Jane looked sadly into her eyes.

"Whatever happen I will always be there for you. I'm going to help you through this Lisbon."

She managed a small smile at him. She breathed out.

"Ugh." She groaned, leaning against the back of the bench, her hands clasping her stomach. "Maybe the milkshake wasn't a great idea after all."

Jane shoved the rest of his ice cream in his mouth and wiped his hands on a napkin.

"May I?" he asked holding out his hand.

"Ahh.. sure." She said, surrendering one of her hands from her stomach, into his hand. He held the back of her hand delicately while making small circles on the middle of her inner forearm with his thumb. "This is called your Pericardium. It's a pressure point that's meant to help nausea." He saw her relax her hold on her torso. He smiled knowing she was feeling a little better because of him.

"Jane?"

"Mmm?"

"Can you take me home?"

"Ahh.. sure. Why?"

"Because I have a feeling I'm going to be very sick soon, and I don't want to be in a public place when it hits."

They got up, but Jane kept hold of her hand. He binned her milkshake cup and lead her towards the passenger seat. She got in and immediately closed her eyes, her arms curled around her midsection. Jane practically jogged to the driver's side, got in and started the ignition. He leant over and did her seatbelt up. He knew she was in pain, and he could do nothing to help her. Even the pressure point hadn't worked.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

They arrived at Lisbon's apartment in record time. She made it in the house and to her bathroom, just in time, before she collapsed in front of the toilet bowl and started retching. Jane followed behind her, pulling her hair off of her face and making soothing circles on her back. Lisbon felt embarrassed at her vulnerable state, but decided that she could test Jane on his promise to be there for her. He said he would help her through this, so now was his chance to stay true to his word.

She stood up weakly, flushing the toilet and putting the lid down so she could sit on it. She accepted the toilet paper Jane was holding out for her and wiped her mouth.

"Sorry." She stated dumbly.

"Don't be sorry Lisbon. Come on, let's get you into bed." He said holding out his hand. She agreed gratefully and took his hand, letting him stare her to her room.

She got into bed and wanted to drift off as soon as her head hit the pillow.

"If you need me, I'll be downstairs." Jane said, seeing that she was comfortable.

"Jane.."

"Lisbon, I said I was going to help you through this. I'm going to keep my word. Now I'll be downstairs if you need me." He said cutting her off.

"Jane, what I was going to say was.. thank you."

"Oh.." he smiled sheepishly at her. "Well, in that case, you're most welcome." He turned and left, closing the door quietly behind him.

Lisbon smiled into her pillow. So this is what it felt like to be taken care of. She liked this feeling. She turned over and sighed. She closed her eyes and was asleep in a matter of minutes.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Lisbon woke up to the smell of toast cooking. She turned and looked at the clock. The blazing digital numbers read 6:07. She had been asleep for nearly five hours. She stretched before getting up. She felt more refreshed than she had in days. She walked over to the window and pulled the curtains, only to see the sun beginning to rise. Shit. She hadn't been asleep for five hours… she had been asleep for seventeen! She quickly slipped into her dressing gown, and made her way downstairs. She walked into the kitchen to find Jane staring at the toaster, willing it to cook faster. She smiled, thinking he looked like a child. It was then she realised he had actually stayed the whole night.

Jane caught a look at Lisbon's reflection in the microwave and turned around. "Morning sleepy head!" he greeted pleasantly.

"Hey Jane." She returned his grin.

"How are you feeling this morning?"

"Yeah a lot better actually. Jane, thank you for―"

She was cut off by Jane screaming of fright, from the toast popping.

Lisbon chuckled. "Are you alright?" she said, unable to hide her smile.

"Yeah, yeah.. I meant to do that.. I had it timed perfectly.. see? I made you smile." He was still breathing slightly heavier than usual.

"Aww.. did Patrick Jane get a fright? It's ok Jane. It happens to me all the time." She smiled at him again. "Anyway, Jane, thank you for being here for me."

"I told you I would be Lisbon." He had regained his composure and was searching the cupboards for the spreads. When he found them, he turned and looked at Lisbon questioningly.

"Peanut butter for me thanks." She said answering him.

He spread their toast and they sat down to eat.

"Thanks Jane." She said taking a bite. "You know, this is the first time in a long time that someone's made me breakfast. Let alone a guy." She looked down and blushed, realising what she had just insinuated.

"It's ok Lisbon. This is the first time I've made breakfast for anyone in a long time, let alone a woman."

She looked up into his eyes for a moment, completely captivated in his stare. She broke the contact realising she liked his stare a little too much.

They shared the rest of their breakfast in silence.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Lisbon walked into her office feeling refreshed. She was pumped for whatever this day would throw at her. She sat down at her office chair, her gaze caught by a large white envelope sitting on the middle of her desk. It had URGENT printed on the middle of it in big red letters. She looked at the sender. It was from the laboratory.

She opened the envelope slowly. She wasn't sure she actually wanted to know the results any more. If she wasn't his daughter, this was going to break him. She opened the folded letter and scanned the page for the results.

She found what she was looking for and read those two words that was going to change Jane's life. A strange feeling washed over her, she had never felt like this before. She got up from her chair and walked to her office door. Jane was lying on his couch, staring at the ceiling in thought. Lisbon looked back at the letter at those two words again.

_POSITIVE MATCH. _

Patrick Jane had a daughter.

**A/N I know this chapter was a little longer than usual, but I just couldn't bear to split it in half. I hope you enjoyed it though =]**

**Please review x**


	9. Chapter 8

**A/N =] just a quick shout out to DanH2010 because.. well you're awesome =] x **

**Read on =]**

Lisbon stood in her doorway a little longer, just watching Jane. She wasn't sure how she was going to break the news to him, even more so, she wasn't sure how he was going to react. She watched him stretch out on his couch, the image of a cat, randomly came to mind. She looked down at the paper again. It wasn't fair to Jane if she kept this from him any longer.

Taking a deep breath for courage, she folded the page in half and made her way over to Jane's couch.

"Patrick?" she whispered, half hoping he was asleep.

The sound of his first name, snapped him back to consciousness immediately. Lisbon would only ever call him Patrick if it was something important, or something personal… or both. He sat up at looked at her expectantly. She was holding a piece of folded paper. She looked nervous.

"Lisbon?"

"Jane.. the results are back. I've ah… I've already opened them." She felt like she had invaded his privacy, she didn't even consider he might get angry at her when she was opening the envelope.

"Wow.. ah.. that wa… that was fast." He was nervous. She could see the glean of sweat forming on his brow.

"I sent it as an urgent request. Top priority." She handed the still folded piece of paper to him. "Jane, whatever happens, I'm going to be there for you." She knelt to the ground, so she was eye level with him.

"How can you say that when you already know the results?" He was stalling. She could tell he was scared out of his mind, from which possible future she was unsure. He was shaking. Lisbon reached out and put her hand on top of his.

"Jane. It's ok. Open it." She removed her hand from the top of his, and slipped it inside, clasping on to it tightly.

He looked at her smile of encouragement and then down at the piece of paper, clearing his throat.

"Lisbon…"

"It's ok Jane."

He rested the piece of paper on his leg, and opened the folds with his free hand. Lisbon watch his eyes scan the results for the two words that was about to change his life forever. She watched his eyes still and she knew he had found them.

"Jane?" she asked after a moment of silence.

She looked into his eyes, noticing how glassy they had become. She could see the tears starting to form in the corner of his eyes.

"Thank you Lisbon." He said suddenly and urgently. He let go of her hand and reached out, pulling her into powerful, but soft hug. She felt him bury his face into her shoulder. Hearing his ragged breaths, she started rubbing his back, shhh-ing into his ear. He breathed three heavy breaths before pulling away from his friend. She grabbed his hand again, trying to steady him a little.

Lisbon looked at him and saw his eyes were a little red, but no longer looked lost. The initial shock had worn off and she saw something else in his eyes, something she thought she would never see in Patrick Jane. Hope. She now knew that he had been crying for what he had lost, and now he was able to focus more on what he had gained.

A small smile crept onto his face.

"Lisbon…" The smile grew until a massive grin was plastered on his face. "Lisbon. I have a daughter… I have a daughter!"

Then he did something Lisbon hadn't seen him do very often. He threw back his head, and he laughed. He was laughing so hard, tears of joy started leaking down the side of his face. Lisbon, completely caught up in the moment, couldn't help but laugh along with him.

She had seen him smile before, brilliant teeth strikingly changing his features, his boyish grin when things go his way, and that smile he seemed to save only for her, the smile that reaches his eyes and confuses her senses in every way possible. But she hadn't seen him laugh very often, and to be honest, she found the sound to be rather enchanting. It was then she realised they were still holding hands, but she found that she didn't really want to let go. Lisbon figured if one of her other agents had walked into the room to see their boss and consultant cracking up like this, they might think they were nut jobs.

They enjoyed a moment of peaceful silence before Lisbon stood up, dragging him with her.

"Come with me." She said. He did let go of her hand almost immediately, but then replaced it onto the small of her back, as he followed her to the elevator.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

"She was here… in the CBI… the whole time?" Jane looked at her astounded, he almost looked impressed. "Wow, Lisbon, I never actually thought you could have pulled off something so incredibly easy."

"Come on Jane, I learnt from the best. I figured you wouldn't think that she was in the building the whole time. And it made it easier to monitor her, keep her safe…" she trailed off seeing the look on his face.

They were standing outside the locked door to Greer's room.

"Jane?"

"What if she doesn't like me?" he looked like a scared teenager, about to ask the head cheerleader to prom.

"Oh, Jane! Come off it. You can charm the socks off of anyone―" (she could tell by the mischievous look in his eye she was going to regret saying that) "― she's your daughter Jane. You're gonna be fine."

"Since when did you become an optimist?"

"When I met you and I had to have something positive to focus on."

"Oh, so I'm not positive enough for you to focus on?"

"Jaane.." she complained, but really she didn't mind the banter. "No, what I meant is, I had to focus on me not getting fired, after each of your little stunts."

"Oh, come on." His eyes were sparkling. "I'm not really that bad.. am I?" He looked at her, pouting.

"Ja-ne." She said, drawing his name out into two syllables with her giggle. "Come on.. stop stalling. Go and tell Greer the news."

"R-right.." he stuttered. "Go and talk to the teenage version of me… this should be fun." He walked towards the door and dismissed the guard. He put his hand on the doorknob and turned his head over his shoulder, looking back at Lisbon. "Thank you Lisbon."

She only nodded in response.

"I'll see you downstairs soon Patrick." She turned away, making her way back to the elevator and her never ending pile of paperwork.

He smiled when she said his first name. Some feeling inside was changing for Lisbon. He could feel their bond growing stronger, which worried him a little bit. He had to be careful, because he didn't want her to get hurt in the long run.

He pushed those thoughts aside and stared back at the door to Greer's room. He didn't know how to tell her. He guess she would know, simply by him being allowed in to see her. He took a deep breath, unlocked the door and turned the handle, entering the room that held his future.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Greer was sitting on her bed, completely fed up. She was sick of being held prisoner. _God dammit! _She stood up and started pacing her room, back and forth, until she ended up at her padlocked window. She held the padlock in her hands, eyeing it up. It wasn't long until they found out the results, but she was starting to feel claustrophobic, and she was also starting to worry about the tests coming back negative. Someone could have tampered with them to frame her for the murder.. or to make her out to be working for this Red John character. or her mother could have lied to her! _God_. She felt fricken paranoid, and she didn't like it. It was starting to mess with her mind a little.

She walked over to where her belongings had been dumped, and fished around for her toiletries. Pulling out a bobby-pin, she straightened it slightly and walked back towards the window. She stuck her clip into the lock, fiddling around until she felt the right amount of pressure and the soft click. The padlock popped open. Greer wrestled the padlock off the window, and opened the bars. She looked back at her belongings, wondering how she would get them home. The image of Patrick Jane came to her mind. She thought sadly that if the results came back positive, then he was going to be quite upset at her disappearance.

_Ah, it was a mistake coming here in the first place. He was only going to get hurt in the end.. maybe mom was right? _She thought sadly of his smiling face before erasing the image from her mind. She climbed up onto the window ledge and was halfway out the window when she heard voices outside her door.

_Crap._

"I'll see you downstairs soon Patrick."

_Lisbon… Patrick… shit. _ She started climbing back through the window. She only managed to get one foot on the ground before the door opened.

"Are you going somewhere?" he looked at her, trying to mask the humour on his face.

Greer looked at him in shock. Here he was, standing in her cupboard of a room.

"I… ah.. no… I was just stretching." She smiled brilliantly at him and started theatrically stretching one hand to her foot that was still perched on the waist high window sill.

Jane smiled, his entire face lighting up. This was one extraordinary girl. He looked around the room, noting the open window and the unlocked padlock.

"Where did you learn how to do this?" He asked taking a seat on her neatly made bed. She put her foot down so she could turn to face him properly.

"Well… nobody actually ever taught me. One day I was locked outside, so I tried picking the lock and it worked―"

"It's all about the feel." They said at the same time. They stared at each other for a while, slightly awestruck at the alikeness they shared.

"Patrick?" Greer asked, breaking the silence. She was serious now. "Why are you here?"

"Greer. The.. ah.. results came back." He was suddenly nervous again. He cleared his throat, about to speak again, when Greer cut him off.

"So, you're either here so say goodbye, or you really… are… my…" she stopped talking seeing his face change towards the latter. He looked expectant, hopeful almost. "Patrick…" she whispered. Her eyes started glistening with tears as she saw the massive grin spread across his face. She looked at him, letting the emotion fill her up. "I found you! I've finally found you!"

Patrick got up and strode over to the girl. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into a fatherly embrace.

"Thank you so much for coming to find me Greer." He felt shaky at the knees.

From all of the pain and suffering he has endured through many years, he finally had something positive to focus on, and he wasn't ever going to lose her. He made a silent vow to himself, noting that he was going to do everything in his power to protect this girl. To protect _his _girl.

They stood there in silent companionship, embraced in what should have been their millionth hug. But to the both of them, this hug had such a powerful meaning, it almost could count for the time they had missed.

Jane let go of her, only so he could look into her face. He felt weightless. He hadn't felt this way since he had held Charlotte in his arms the first time. The thought momentarily paralyzed him with grief, but he soon replaced the feeling with joy.

He looked down at his watch. 8.05. The rest of the team must have arrived at the CBI by now, whether Lisbon had told them the news or not, was another story.

"Come with me Greer. There are some people I would like to properly introduce you to."

They smiled warmly at each other and then made for the elevator.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Jane and Greer had barely stepped out of the elevator before Van Pelt flung herself at Jane, embracing him in a near strangulating hug.

"I heard the news!" she said excitedly. "Congratulations! Both of you!" She let go of Jane and bent down to give Greer a softer embrace. "I'm really glad you two could find each other." She smiled at both of them again.

"Wow.. ah thanks Grace." Jane said returning the smile as he fully stepped out of the elevator, that was threatening to close on them.

Greer giggled, she liked Grace she decided.

They made their way further into the bullpen, Cho muttering a soft congratulations. Jane knew that this was all he was going to get out of him, but Greer wouldn't have that.

She looked at the stoic agent, putting on her best smile.

"Why, thank you Kimball!"

Cho looked up into the teenagers face. She looked so much like Jane and he couldn't help but smile back at her.

Jane stared in astonishment when he saw the grin spread across Cho's face.

"My my, I've been here how long, and I only ever get a smile out of him when I make a fool of myself… you've been here, what? five minutes? And already you've managed to make this emotionless man smile." Jane grinned at her. He still couldn't get over the fact that she really was his. They had solid DNA evidence. He could be a father again. He hadn't actually realised he missed being a parent so much, until it had been dangled in front of him again.

They walked a little more, almost as if Jane was parading her off. Actually that's exactly what he was doing, he realised.

Rigsby stuck out his hand.

"Wayne Rigsby" he said when she accepted his hand and shook it.

"Come on Rigsby.. we all know she's pretty but you don't need to flash the James Bond formalities around… she's my daughter… it just wouldn't be right. You're too old." Jane smiled that mischievous smile when Rigsby blushed a deep red. He turned away, muttering something about how he was just trying to be polite. Jane shook it off with a slight "Meh."

It felt great. To say that she was his daughter. It made it feel all the more real.

It was then Jane decided to take her through to see Lisbon. He wasn't sure how the two would react to each other, seeing as last time he saw them together, Lisbon was cuffing her and placing the poor girl under arrest. But Lisbon had said she had been to see Greer, and had said they were ok, so he decided it would be best if he tested that theory. He just hoped Lisbon was telling the truth.

They walked into Lisbon's office to find her sitting at her desk, with her head in her hands.

"Hey Lisbon." Jane said with a small smile. Greer was standing behind him, only slightly in view. "You ok?" he asked her, knowing full well she still wasn't feeling all that well.

"Yeah I'm ok Jane. Just the same. But with toast in the system." She smiled at him.

Greer looked at Jane questioningly. Jane just shrugged his shoulders in response. He was still going to stay true to his word with Lisbon, her secret was safe with him.

"Lisbon…" Jane said as if he was opening an act. "I would like you to meet my daughter." He said a little more softly.

Greer stepped around Jane, stating a smooth "Hey Teresa."

"Hey Greer."

They smiled at each other. Their silent companionship slightly confusing Jane.

"I told you we were ok." Lisbon stated. "There's no reason for you to look so surprised." She smirked at him.

"Girls." Jane muttered.

This only made both Greer and Lisbon's smiles grow larger.

"Well, Greer, you really do forgive easily… she did wrongly arrest you after all."

Lisbon scoffed and threw a pencil at him.

"Don't be so damn rude Jane!"

"What? I'm only telling the truth." He smiled at her innocently.

Lisbon quickly returned the smile with a small sweet pout of her lip. Jane looked at her, slightly mesmerised, before the whole container of pencils was flung towards him.

"Oww! Lisbon!"

Lisbon smiled triumphantly.

"Ahh… do you two want me to leave the room for a minute?" Greer asked, feeling slightly embarrassed.

"What?"

"Why would we want you to do that?"

Jane and Lisbon spoke at the same time, both answering a little too quickly.

Greer looked at them.

"Is there something I should know?"

"No. Nothing." Lisbon answered, even faster than her last response.

"Okaay. If you insist." Greer said, not convinced at all.

"I do insist. This conversations over." Lisbon ordered.

Greer only smiled wickedly. She knew she had hit a nerve there, with both of them. Lisbon's response was incredibly defensive and Patrick hadn't said anything at all. She would have to explore this relationship a little more.

She could easily see they were both in denial over something..she just wasn't completely sure what yet. But she intended to find out!

**Please review =]**


	10. Chapter 9

**A/N I'm not so sure I like this chapter, it seemed kind of rushed. But I'm already working on the next chapter and I'm liking that one a lot more already =]**

It was well past midday, and the CBI was mostly deserted. Lisbon and the rest of the team, were out talking to suspects. Van Pelt and Rigsby had found which address Randall was at and had gone to ask him some more questions. Lisbon and Cho, were back at the victim's work, interrogating more of her clients and the remaining colleagues. This left Jane and Greer alone at CBI, allowing them to talk. The excitement of them finding out the results, had died down a bit, leaving a slightly awkward silence.

They were sitting on Jane's couch, staring at each other with awkward anticipation.

"So, ah..? How's school?" Jane asked, finally breaking the silence.

Greer shifted so her back was leaning against the couch arm.

"School's… good…" she said.

Jane could hear the hesitation in her voice.

"Really?" he asked, a hint of sarcasm playing in his voice.

"Well…I don't really go to school much anymore…" She looked up at him, watching his reaction. Not a single emotion flickered across his face.

"Oh, and why is that?"

"Well, I have places to be. I'm busy." She smiled nervously at him. She really didn't want him to think she was some kind of drop out.

He chuckled, passing this off to be amusing. He had been the same, although he had been a carnie, he had had no time to attend school.

"Greer, you're a bright girl. You could go far with a proper education."

"I don't need school." She smiled wryly at him. "I have everything I need to know, in books and on the internet."

"Yes, I'm sure… but what do you want to _be_? You need actual qualifications these days."

Greer looked down at her fingers. I don't get to _be _ anything. It will all be over soon. She sighed, casting those thoughts away.

"You know, I'm not really sure yet. There's so many possibilities out there." She said putting her well practiced mask back in check. If Jane had suspected anything, _his_ impenetrable mask didn't show it.

"Oh, right. I guess you've still got enough time to figure it all out."

"Yeah I guess."

They both sat back in the awkward silence for a few moments.

"How's your mother?" Jane asked, at his second attempt to make small talk.

"Yeah, she's good. Still unhappy about me being here, but it's really not her choice."

"Does she know about―"

"―about me getting arrested? No. Teresa promised it wouldn't go on record and I saw no reason to tell her. She'd only show up here and force me to come home." Greer look up, and sighed. "She can really be a handful sometimes. I have my own problems to worry about." –_shit._

"Problems?" Jane asked. "Like what?"

–_double shit._

"Oh, you know, teenager stuff. Boys and stuff." She lied. She watched Jane shift in his seat.

When Charlotte was first born, Jane had always been worried about her getting older and him having to deal with the whole boyfriend thing. _Ugh._ Even thinking about it still makes him shudder slightly. And now… now he has a seventeen year old daughter that's already interested in boys? He didn't even get time to prepare himself. This is just like _Wham! _Even this morning, when he had been joking around with Rigsby, he hadn't really even thought about it, he had just wanted to make the young agent blush, but _Hell_! He was going to have to keep one eye on her at all times.

Greer saw the struggle going on inside his head. _Crap… what's he thinking about? Had he figured out she was lying to him? did he know her secret? _She watched him compose himself. He cleared his throat.

"Right… yes... boys."

"You alright?"

"Yeah… it's just, you're so young. And boys.. well, let's just say I know what I was like at your age." He mentally slapped himself. Oh god, he had no idea what he was doing. He didn't know how to react. He saw Greer smile then. "What's so funny?"

"Patrick, it's ok. You're not meant to know how to react to this sort of thing. Steve still doesn't know what to do."

"Steve? Who's Steve?"

Greer gave herself a figurative pat on the back― she had managed to change the subject.

"Steve's my step-dad. He's been around as long as I can remember. Now that I think about it, I can't understand why my mother didn't just raise me into thinking he was my father? If she didn't want me to meet you so badly? Then why not lie to me?"

Jane's eyes softened.

"It's because she knows you're a part of me. She knows you would have figured it out in the end, and then you would have resented her for lying to you all your life. Am I right?"

Greer sighed. "Yeah, I guess. But she's always wanted to keep me so close. I just still can't understand why she wanted me to stay away from you so badly."

"I guess she was just trying to protect you. Your mother and me… we were really good friends. She was always there for me. But I made a wrong decision, and the next thing I know, she was gone. After that I met my wife. I haven't heard from your mother in nearly eighteen years."

"Your wife, what was her name?" Greer asked slowly. She knew she was treading dangerous grounds here.

"Angela. Her name was Angela."

"What was she like?"

"She was… she was… ah…" Jane's head started to swirl. He felt the grief starting to build up in his chest. He looked at the ground and started shaking his head. "I'm sorry… I can't―" he could feel himself breathing faster than usual. Was he having a panic attack? Why was it so hard to talk about this with Greer? She was his daughter for goodness sake.

"Hey, Patrick. It's ok. Don't worry. Calm down." She reached over and patted him on the shoulder. Note to self; _family conversations are off limit._

Jane cleared his throat again, in attempt for composure. This girl must think he's a total nutcase!

"Sorry about that." He gave her an apologetic smile. "I guess it hurts to talk about their memories. Every time I think about them, I remember… the last time I saw them."

"Patrick…I'm so sorry." Greer whispered. He really had been through something terrible. "Well, can you tell me a bit more about this Red John?"

Jane looked up, a little more self composed. "Ah… sure… Well before my family, he had killed a total of eight women― that we knew of anyway. I used to be a pretend psychic." He smiled sheepishly at her.

"How? How did you do that?"

"Well, basically I put my perception skills to the limit. I 'contacted' their deceased, by watching their reactions, and went from there… your mother actually used to help me."

Greer smiled. "Really? I wouldn't have picked her to be in the show business. She's too… quiet."

"Hah, well the Tracy I knew, she was the life and soul of the party. She really knew how to bring out anybodies wild side."

"Wow. Now all mom does is hang around the house and go to work every other day. How did she help you though? Tell me more!"

Jane smiled, he could tell the girl was excited. She was hearing a completely different side to her mother, that he could see she really did want to explore.

"Well, we would go into a bar or a restaurant, or sometimes even on the side of the street, and I would start acting strange around the bar area― if we were in a bar, and somehow I would get the attention of everyone inside."

"How? What were you doing?"

"Well, I would start swaying and closing my eyes, sort of talk to myself. Yell a bit. Sometimes I would collapse. Then I would start searching. At this point most of the bars inhabitants would be silent, all eyes on me. I would search around, muttering, something unfathomable. Then I would look at Tracy, point at her. Ask her… well no, _tell _ her she's lost someone recently. She would nod at me, tears in her eyes… and then, well on with the rest of the show. Your mother was quite theatrical."

"Wow… but really? People actually went for that sort of thing?" Greer asked smirking at his story.

"Well yeah… most of the time anyway. I got kicked out of a couple of places for invading people's privacy, and for been a whack-off." He laughed. "It wasn't until I got more a name for myself that we started getting real shows. After your mother left, I started doing more personal readings― private readings. Better money you see. I got to go on talk shows. I was being interviewed all of the time. My client list was huge! And then the police asked me to get a reading on Red John. I appeared on TV, said my bit… and then… well… I'm sure you can guess the rest." Jane licked his lips and breathed out through his nose. The uplifted mood from memory lane was gone, replaced with his deep torment. "I guess. I had it coming… karma and all that."

"You can't be serious!" Greer stared at him, he eyes wide in disbelief. "Yeah, karma's a bitch and all that… but you can't seriously think you deserved what happened to you!"

"No? My family didn't deserve it. I did. And until that son of a bitch is dead… well, my conscience won't be cleared."

"Patrick… everyone deserves a second chance."

"Oh really? Maybe I don't. Because it's been eight years, and I still haven't had my second chance."

Greer looked away, feeling hurt.

"Well, I just thought that maybe _I _was your second chance."

Jane looked at her, there were tears treading her lower lashes.

"Oh, Greer. I'm sorry. I just… I haven't exactly had time to process all of this… you… you are my second chance. Aren't you?"

"Yeah I guess I am." Her breath hitched with tears and she turned away, coughing into her shoulder.

"Greer." He looked at her. "I am sorry."

She turned to return his stare and gave him a small smile.

"Don't be. I shouldn't have been such a baby. Of course you'll need time to adjust. I guess I didn't think too much about it from your point of view."

They smiled at each other in that awkward way.

"Ah, Greer. There's just one problem."

"Mmm?"

"I don't exactly have anywhere for you to stay…"

"Oh…? Um… is that your polite way of saying you don't want me to stay with you? Too personal?"

"What? Oh, no! not at all. I… live in a motel… and most other nights I camp out here…" He looked a little ashamed.

"Oh. Right… why?" she asked, she was looking strangely at him.

_Yup. She thinks I'm a nut job._

"I can't seem to get any sleep at my house, so I stay at a motel. The nights I stay here, we're usually in the middle of a case, so I work during the night. Plus… its peaceful."

"Ok? But I don't believe you…"

"What?" Jane asked confused. Greer smiled mischievously.

"It's the couch isn't it?"

Jane couldn't help but laugh.

"You caught me. It's a great couch."

Their little laughing spiel was interrupted by Van Pelt returning into the bullpen. She walked in and smiled fondly at the laughing pair.

"Hey Van Pelt." Jane greeted.

"Hey guys." She walked over to her desk and sat down.

"What happened with the husband?" Jane asked.

"Not a whole lot. He came back clean. Apparently one of the housekeepers had stayed without his knowledge. So he has a pretty solid alibi."

"Hmmph. So what now?"

Grace looked at him in surprise. This was not natural Patrick Jane behaviour. Usually by now he would have sussed out the killer and have some brilliant scheme in play, in order to catch the bad guy. But here he was, asking what comes next? Grace smiled to herself… maybe this girl was bringing out a better side of him.

"Grace?"

"Oh, sorry." She ran her hand nervously through her hair. "Lisbon called. She wants you and Greer to head down to the salon. Thinks you might be useful."

"Ok." He flashed a smile at Grace, before standing up. "Come on Greer. Let's go solve a murder." He said again. He just hoped the outcome turned out better… ie, that only the bad guy would be arrested this time.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

They arrived at the salon to find it relatively empty. They had closed shop for a couple of hours, in order for the agents for carry on with their investigation. As Greer and Jane walked inside, Lisbon spotted the pair and made her way over to them.

"What have you got for my brilliant brain Lisbon?" Jane asked with a smirk. Lisbon rolled her eyes at him.

"We've been talking to a few people, most of them have come up dry, but there is someone I want you to take a look at… she seems kind of skittish." Lisbon pointed to the girl standing by herself.

"Alright then."

Jane motioned for Greer to follow him and they made their way to the corner girl was leaning against.

"Hi. My names Patrick Jane." He held out his hand for her to shake. She just stood there and stared at his hand, shaking slightly and fidgeting with her hands. "Okaay then." He pulled his hand away awkwardly. "Can you at least tell me your name?"

The girl continued to stare at him. She looked completely spaced out and she couldn't stop shaking. It wasn't a nervous shake, more like a involuntary twitch. Jane looked over at Lisbon and motioned for her to come over. Greer stood behind Jane, quietly watching.

"Her name Lisbon?"

"What? Oh come on! Her names Sophie Daniels. A moment ago we couldn't get her to shut up!"

"Hmmm." The sound escaped Greer's mouth before she could stop it.

"Yes?" Lisbon asked.

Jane turned around and smiled. He wondered if she was about to say what he was thinking.

"Can you check between her toes?"

_Yes! _ah.. his daughter was more like him then he thought.

"Ah… why? Lisbon asked.

"It's a Jane hunch." Jane said. Greer blushed at the mention of him calling her a Jane. She liked it.

Lisbon rolled her eyes and looked disgustedly at the girls sandaled feet.

"What exactly am I looking for?"

"Just look!"

Lisbon groaned as she bent down. She pulled a pen out of her pocket and poked between the girls toes. Sophie continued to stare at Jane, as if she didn't even realise a pen was prodding at the webbing on her feet.

"She has fresh cuts between her toes. An addict?"

"Well, seeing as I told you to do that once, and it drew the same conclusion.. then yes."

Lisbon climbed off of the floor. Sophie mumbled something unsophisticated.

"What was that?" Jane asked, bending down so he came in line with her stare. She twitched.

"I gotta go see Joe!" she repeated. Her eyes shifted a little, seeming to come back into focus.

"Joe? Who's Joe?" Jane's voice was serious.

"Joe? He's my boyfriend."

"Joe Harkins?"

"Yep. That's the one." She was twitching nervously.

"Sophie, what was your relationship with the victim?" Lisbon asked.

"Oh, you mean other than screwing the same guy?"

"Yes. Other than… that." Lisbon said.

Sophie rolled her eyes. "She was my boss. I was second in charge. We never really hung out much. But we worked well together." She continued to fidget.

"Miss Daniels? Did you kill Suzie Philip?"

"I may have… I may not have… how would killing her benefit me?"

"You kill her, you get her job… more money, more power. She was sleeping with your partner. It must have made you angry." Lisbon said, in attempt to get a confession. Usually she wouldn't question suspects like this, that was usually Cho's way, but the whole addiction thing, it was cutting a little too close to home. She was dying for a drink. She would do anything for one right now.

"Yeah. Ok. So I did it. So what? She'll be thanking me for it now. At least she got out of her boring life." She laugh hysterically.

"Sophie Daniels, you are under arrest for the murder of Suzie Philip."

While Lisbon read her her rights, Jane turned around to look at Greer.

"How did you know to look between her toes?"

"Oh, I saw it on TV once." She smiled at him.

"Ahh… maybe I should be watching more TV?"

They turned back to Lisbon. Cho had taken Sophie back to CBI to get a formal statement.

"Nice catch Greer. I see you inherited your father's brains. And it's ok, I won't arrest you for it this time."

The two girls walked off laughing, leaving Jane standing by himself watching them. It seems as if all of their troubles had been left in the past. He could tell they were going to get along well from now on. An idea hit him and he ran over to them.

"Lisbon, I need to ask you a favour?"

"Ahh, sure Jane?" _This can't be good…_

"Well, seeing as it's the weekend tomorrow, Greer doesn't exactly have anywhere to stay.. and my motel room is only one bedroom, and she can't exactly stay at the CBI… I was wondering if she could stay with you? At least until I get myself in check, find a place…" Jane trailed off, mentally crossing his fingers that she would say yes.

"Oh no, I couldn't." Greer looked at Lisbon, then at Jane. "Patrick, that wasn't fair to spring that on her like that."

Lisbon looked at little confused. Was he playing her? Who would babysitting who? She sighed. She did owe both of them.

"Yeah sure. That would be fine. But you'll have to sleep on the couch… the spare room isn't exactly guest worthy. But if you really are your fathers daughter… you won't mind the couch." She smiled.

"That's ok.. but are you sure? I really don't want to invade your privacy."

"And that's a trait you didn't learn from you father."

"Oh ha-ha. Be nice Lisbon, or I may just have to thump you."

"Thump me? _You're_ going to thump_ me_?"

"I wouldn't dream of it." He smiled wickedly.

"Oh! Jane!" She whacked him against his chest.

"Oww Lisbon! You're a bully! First you throw pencils at me, and now you're hitting me. I'm a beaten consultant."

Greer giggled at them. They were at it again. God there was definitely something there.

"Come on Greer." Lisbon said, turning her back on the still whinging consultant. "Let's grab your stuff and head home."

"Sounds like a plan."

She turned towards Jane and walked in for a nervous hug.

"Night Patrick."

"Night Greer. I'll come see you tomorrow. Make sure you ladies are coping alright."

"Ok. I'll see you tomorrow then." She smiled at him. She had never felt quite so happy in her life.

"Night Jane."

"Night Lisbon."

Greer saw both pairs of eyes soften when they said goodbye to each other.

They had it so bad.


	11. Chapter 10

**A/N Ok, I really couldn't wait until tomorrow to post this chapter up, I really hope you enjoy this chapter, it was really interesting to write.**

**Btw, thank you so much to everyone who has reviewed this story! Sorry I haven't mentioned you any earlier, but every review puts a smile on my face =] so thanks! x**

By the time Lisbon and Greer had arrived home, it was well after dark. They had stopped off at CBI to collect Greer's things and Lisbon had checked in with Cho over Sophie. They had ordered takeout Chinese food and were both in the process of picking at their desired meals. Lisbon still hadn't got her appetite back, but she was forcing small mouthfuls at a time.

"So…" Greer said in a conversational tone. "You and Jane? What's going on there?"

"What?" Lisbon spluttered out, before she started choking on her mouthful. She reached for her glass of coke to help wash it down. Eyes streaming, she looked up at Greer. "What makes you think that there's something going on? We're just colleagues… and friends." She added as an afterthought.

"Oh, just the chemistry between you two."

"Chemistry? Like what?" Lisbon was a little nervous about having this conversation, she suddenly lost her appetite completely and put the box of Chinese on the coffee table.

"Oh… I don't know..? The playful banter, the loving smiles… the way he does almost anything to get your attention…" Greer said in a sing-song voice.

"Greer, we're just friends. Most of the time he drives me up the wall… if that's his way of saying he wants attention… well, he could do something a little less annoying."

"You guys just seem to connect."

"We're friends. I've known Jane for years now, we're just friends."

"You've said that four times now." Greer gave her a baiting smile.

"Oh… shut up!" Lisbon wouldn't look her in the eye.

"It's ok Teresa. I'm just playing with you… but seeing as you two are such great friends… I need to ask you something. And don't worry… it's nothing personal.. well concerning you anyway."

Lisbon forced herself to look at Greer. She was only trying to trick her into saying something she would much rather hide… _ha, like father, like daughter… _

"Ah… sure. Ask away."

"It's about Patrick… well obviously. But something really isn't right with him."

"How so?" Lisbon asked, wanting to actually take part in the conversation, now that she knew it didn't concern her so much.

"Well, I asked him about his wife today… and he, kind of had a mini panic attack. Don't get me wrong, I can't even begin to imagine the sort of pain he has to put up with every day… but it's been eight years, it almost seems like the pain is still as fresh as the day it happened. Has he ever talked about it before?"

Lisbon sighed sadly.

"Jane doesn't talk about anything. He keeps everything bottled up. I personally think, if he talked about it, he would be able to move on. But it's not just the grief that's killing him. It's the guilt."

"Because he taunted Red John?"

"He thinks that it's his fault his family was murdered."

"That's not fair! If it's anybody's fault, it's Red John's. No one should be so purely evil, that they would kill a man's family for revenge!"

Lisbon shifted uncomfortably. She wasn't enjoying this conversation much, but Greer had a right to get _some _answers.

"Teresa… your honest opinion..?"

"Yeah?"

"If, or when, Patrick kills Red john… do you think he will feel any better for it? Will it really relieve the guilt that has been eating away at him for so many years?"

Lisbon sat and thought about her question before answering.

"To be perfectly honest… no. I know he will feel redemption for his family… but this has become more of a game. But he will feel relief… definitely. Jane's scared. He's scared that Red John is going to hurt the ones he loves the most. About a year or so ago, Jane started pulling away from the unit… started pulling away from me. When I confronted him about it, he said that everyone that gets close to him, bad things happen. I think that once Red John's dead, he might stop blaming himself. He _needs_ to stop blaming himself."

Greer tucked her legs under her, turning so she was fully facing Lisbon.

"I guess it makes sense now… why he wanted me to stay with you."

"Oh yeah? How's that?"

"It gets me off the radar. Staying with him would be too obvious… and you own a gun." Greer smiled sheepishly at her. "It's because he trusts you. He's living his life in fear, and by me staying here, he's hoping I won't have to."

Lisbon nodded, understanding where she was coming from.

"Greer, he can't talk about his family, especially to you, because he's scared the same thing will happen to you. He doesn't want to lose you."

Greer looked down at her hands, that guilty look on her face again.

"Greer?"

"Mmm?" Greer looked up, her mask back on. If Lisbon hadn't seen that face before, she almost would have thought she had imagined the look. She really was her father's daughter… she was great at hiding things.

"Is there something you want to tell me?"

"No?"

"Are you sure? Because I've seen that look before, in the interrogation room… and you said there was something you needed to tell me."

"There's nothing."

"Greer, you don't have to lie to me."

"Is there something you want to tell me Teresa?" Greer asked in a mocking tone, turning the attention off of her.

"Excuse me?"

"The pale complexion, the lack of appetite, the shakes, the bags under your eyes from loss of sleep… nausea maybe?"

"Greer." Lisbon said sternly.

"I'll tell you mine, if you tell me yours."

Lisbon huffed. _Teenagers. Exhausting. Annoying. And this one was a Jane! that just doubles― triples! in annoyance. _Even worse, because she knew she was right._ She really― reeeally needed a drink._

"Fine…" Y_ou win._

Greer smiled.

"I think it's time we went to bed. I'll grab you a pillow and some blankets. The bathroom is through there." Lisbon said, picking up their rubbish from tea and taking it through to the kitchen.

_Dammit! She's only trying to help. God…_

"Teresa. I'm sorry… um… soon. Ok? I just… I can't. Not yet." Greer got up and followed Lisbon into the kitchen. Lisbon turned around eyeing her.

"Look, ok, I get it. But you could have just told me that from the beginning, instead of the personal attack on me. Your just about as observational as your father. Maybe better, considering your only seventeen… but that's not the point. I'm still an adult and you need to show a little respect."

Greer shifted from foot to foot, obviously uncomfortable.

"I really am sorry Teresa. It's just… I can't have Patrick know… not yet."

"Ok Greer." Lisbon walked past her towards the linen cupboard. She pulled out a few blankets and passed them to Greer. "I'll grab you a pillow."

"Thanks Teresa." Greer said in a small voice. She watched Lisbon leave to go upstairs. She was really starting to doubt herself again. Maybe she really shouldn't have come here. This was going to destroy so many people. She sat down on the couch, curling into a small upright ball in the corner. She started playing with a loose thread on the arm of the couch. She felt like absolute crap. She could feel the guilt building up inside her, the pressure almost choking her. She could feel the tears coming. She heard Lisbon at the top of the staircase, returning with a pillow.

"Here." Lisbon said chucking the pillow to her. Greer thanked her quietly, using up every ounce of her energy trying to stay composed until Lisbon had gone. "The remote to the TV's in the draw."

Greer nodded, uttering a small "Thank you."

Lisbon stood there awkwardly for a second, before bidding her goodnight and climbing back up the stairs for bed.

As soon as Greer heard her door shut, she lay down on her makeshift bed, her silent tears escaping down her face and soaking the pillow.

_I'm a horrible person! Why didn't I just leave it alone?_

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Lisbon woke with a start. Waking… that meant she had actually managed to fall asleep. She rolled over, trying to figure out what had woken her. Two figures were standing over her bed. She sat up quickly, fumbling for the light switch.

"Hello Teresa." A husky voice said.

Lisbon finally found the switch, illuminating the room. There, standing in front of her, was a masked man.

"Nice to finally meet you in person." The masked man said holding out his hand for her to shake.

Lisbon scanned the room, fear starting to bubble inside her. She found the other figure, green eyes met blue― Greer.

"You do realise it's rude not to accept a hand shake?" The man said, his tone smooth. He slapped her hard across the jaw line.

_Jesus! That's gonna leave a bruise. _

Lisbon sat back up, dazed. She looked back at Greer.

"Why?" Was all she could think to say.

"Sorry Teresa. I was genuinely starting to like you. Just think of it this way, at least Patrick wont blame you."

Lisbon looked at her confused.

"Oh come on. Really? I have to spell it out for you?"

Lisbon still stared at her vacantly. Her jaw was throbbing and she was having a hard time concentrating. The masked man giggled with delight. Greer moved around the room, so she was standing at the foot of Lisbon's bed.

"What are the chances that a girl comes into the CBI, after eighteen years… and actually turns out to be his daughter… you had it right from the beginning Teresa."

"But… the paternity test… it said―"

"Look, I― we, have that many connections… of course we're going to have someone in the lab that can alter the results. It's the perfect ploy to get close to Patrick Jane."

"We? Who's we?"

"Oh, my god. Seriously? Did you hit her _that_ hard?" she asked turning to the masked man who chuckled in response.

"Jane isn't my father. Red John is. That's what I've been hiding. I guess I felt a little guilty because I was going to destroy so many lives. My conscience got the best of me… but then Daddy rang me and reminded me of what we were doing. How many people we were going to avenge, from con-man Patrick Jane… my mother included."

Lisbon felt like she was suffocating. Red John was standing over her. She was gonna die… _oh god, she was gonna die._

Red john let out another excited cackle.

"Greer? Would you like to do the honours?"Red John asked in his husky voice.

"Oh really? Are you sure?" Greer asked excitedly.

"Of course, my dear. I think you're ready."

Greer jumped up and down, like a toddler that had been given a lollipop.

"Thank you Daddy!" she squealed. She bent over, reaching into a bag, pulling out some gloves. She snapped the gloves on, and then fished through the bag, drawing out a long curved, silver knife.

Lisbon screamed as Greer ventured towards her. Red John pounced on her, securing her hands behind her back with one hand, and putting his other hand over her mouth. She lived in an apartment block and he didn't want to draw attention to the neighbours.

Greer came up to her and placed the knife on Lisbon's shoulder, like a surgeon would place a scalpel on a patient.

Lisbon could taste the latex of Red John's gloves, she could feel the cool metal against her skin. Cool metal turned to hot searing pain as Greer started to slice her upper arm open. Lisbon started to thrash about, tears were rolling uncontrollably down her face. Red John was doing a great job at muffling her screams, she had a feeling that they would have made _her_ deaf.

She felt Greer stop cutting. She heard the small _clink _as Greer lay the knife on her bedside table. Lisbon forced herself to look at Greer, pouring every ounce of hatred possible into that stare. This seemed to only amuse her. She reached out, dipping her gloved fingers into the fresh wound. Red John forced Lisbon to look at the wall. Greer stood up on the bed and started drawing Red John's trade mark smiley-face. They were making her watch her draw the symbol that was sealing her fate. She was going to die.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Lisbon sat straight up in bed, gasping for air, her entire body drenched in sweat. She quickly turned on the light switch, and examined her body in a rush. There was no cut on her arm, her jaw wasn't throbbing. She was the only one in the room. She was still breathing heavily.

_Shit! _

She took a few calming breaths. Relief spreading through her body.

_Damn nightmare! Yet another bloody withdrawal symptom. _She couldn't take it anymore. She needed a drink! She needed one now! She pulled back the covers and got out of bed. She padded across her bedroom, opening the door slowly, trying to keep the creaking of the door to a minimum. She walked gingerly down the stairs, hoping that she didn't wake the sleeping teenager.

As she got further down the stairs, she was greeted with the sound of coughing, followed by retching, coming from the direction of her downstairs bathroom. Another bound of quite violent sounding coughs resounded through the apartment. Lisbon quickened her pace until she was standing outside the bathroom door. She was greeted with the sound of wheezing coming from inside.

She knocked a few times.

"Greer? Are you alright?" she called softly.

She was only answered by another fit of coughing.

"Greer. I'm coming in."

Lisbon turned the handle and timidly stepped inside. Greer was spread out on the floor in front of the toilet, violently coughing into her elbow.

"Greer, honey. What brought this on?"

Greer jumped as if in fright. She hadn't even noticed Lisbon enter the room. Lisbon made her way over to Greer. It was then she noticed the contents in the toilet. The bowl was sprayed a crimson red.

"Greer! Oh my god!"

Greer, who had somewhat controlled her breathing sat up and leant against the tub.

"Teresa, it's ok. I'm fine." She rasped.

"Fine? _Fine! _You certainly don't look fine. Sorry to break it to ya, but throwing up blood isn't a good thing. I'm calling an ambulance."

"No! Teresa. It's fine!"

"Well explain to me what's going on then!"

"Fine… you see… I'm really a vampire… and my last meal didn't agree with me."

"Greer." Lisbon said sternly.

Greer sighed remorsefully. She reached up and flushed the toilet.

"Fine. But you better sit down." She patted the spot beside her on the floor.

Lisbon walked across the bathroom and sat down beside her. Greer looked at Lisbon, regret filled her eyes.

"It's ok Greer. You can trust me."

Greer nodded.

She took a deep breath.

"I have cancer." She cleared her throat. Unable to look Lisbon in the eye. "Lung cancer. I found out a few years back… I've stopped responding to treatments." Lisbon felt her heart sink. _This poor poor girl… poor Jane… wait… Jane! _

"Oh… Greer… I'm so sorry." Lisbon reached out and grabbed the girls hand.

"So now you see why I couldn't tell you? This is going to destroy Patrick. My mother didn't tell me about his family… she didn't tell me anything about him! And now… well, I'm going to die… and he's going to… this is going to break him! I don't know what to do!"

Lisbon could feel the tears rolling down her own face.

"You need to tell him Greer."

"I know! I just can't. Not yet… please… just give me a few more days. I just need a few more happy days with him… before I shatter his world… promise me you won't tell."

Lisbon looked at Greer. The look on her face gave her chest pains. She really needed that drink now.

"Promise me!"

"Ok Greer. I promise."

Greer sighed in relief.

"How long?" Lisbon asked and Greer knew she wasn't asking how long she had to keep the promise.

"A month… maybe two."

"A couple of months?" Lisbon whispered. She felt lightheaded. "There's nothing they can do?"

"I've had extreme chemo and radiation therapies." She pulled up her top, revealing a long white scar and several other smaller scars down the center of her torso. "I've had that many surgeries I've lost count. But it just keeps growing back. My last check up… they told me that it's spread. I have several shadows on my lungs, and now I have a small one on my liver."

Lisbon squeezed her hand. Actions speak louder than words, and right now she didn't have any words for this girl. She felt like she was in mourning. Her poor friend.

"I need a drink." Lisbon stated.

Greer looked wearily at her.

"Teresa, you were right tonight. I am observant… and I know you have a drinking problem… it's not going to help anything."

Lisbon sighed. She knew she was right. She hated that she was right. If she started now, she wouldn't be able to stop. But the idea of passing out into a drunken stupor, was oddly satisfying at the moment.

_To hell with it._

Lisbon got up and walked out of the bathroom, returning shortly with a bottle of scotch and two glasses. She sat back down and filled both glasses. She handed one to Greer.

"Lisbon…" Greer said wearily.

"Just tonight… please Greer. I need to. Just tonight. Please." She was practically begging.

Greer held up her glass.

"To Patrick Jane." She toasted.

Lisbon smiled gratefully. She touched glasses with Greer and took a long sip of the alcohol, letting it burn her throat and warm her belly. She sighed in satisfaction. She grabbed Greer's hand again. They sat there in companionable silence, both staring at the wall, lost in thought. The same man was the subject of their thoughts, Patrick Jane.

This was going to break him.

**Please review! I really wana know what you think! x**


	12. Chapter 11

**A/N sorry for any grammatical errors, I had to get this chapter written fast seeing as I'm away the rest of the week. I do apologize because this fic has turned out a lot darker than I had originally planned.. I hope you don't mind =]**

**I love all of my reviewers! You make me happeeee! =]**

Lisbon woke up to a shrill ringing by her left ear. She cracked her eyes open slowly, hissing slightly at the bright light streaming through the curtains. She had somehow managed to make it from the bathroom floor to the couch. She had a splitting headache and felt sick to her stomach. The ringing grew louder with each passing moment. She groaned as the noise resounded through her head, seeming to bounce off her skull. Picking up the phone, she sat up slowly, answering with a curt "Lisbon."

"Boss." It was Cho. "We got a full confession from Sophie. Turns out the knife belonged to Joe Harkins, that's why his prints were on the knife, it seems she was bright enough to wear gloves. She wanted the manager job so she had a few extra bucks to buy drugs for her and Joe. Then she overheard Suzie telling someone she was pregnant with Joe's child. So she killed her."

"Ok, thanks Cho." Lisbon put her head in her hands.

"No problem boss. Looks like you don't have to come in today. Have a nice weekend off."

Lisbon hung up her phone and looked up, taking in her surroundings for the first time that morning. Greer was curled up on an armchair, still seemingly asleep. The bottle of scotch was worryingly empty- turns out she had drunk a LOT more than she had initially thought. There was a bucket placed on the floor by the head of the couch.

She groaned, bringing her hand up to her forehead. She had hoped everything had been another terrible nightmare, but the mostly empty bottle of scotch confirmed her fears. Her heart contracted. This was going to destroy Jane. Hadn't this man been through enough? She sighed, her breath catching a little on the silent sob that escaped her throat. This was going to be torture keeping this from him. She now understood why Greer hadn't told her from the start. She had been trying to protect her. Lisbon sniffed, wiping her face from the tears that had fallen without her knowing.

She heard Greer shift and looked up to find too blue eyes staring at her. It was a look Jane had given her many times, the type that made you think they were looking right into your soul.

"Teresa?"

"I'm ok." Lisbon verified, clearing her throat.

Greer got up and padded over to the couch. She sat down beside Lisbon and put a hand on her shoulder.

"I'm sorry you had to find out like this. And I'm sorry that I've burdened you with my secret. I know he's your friend, but all I'm asking is you leave it for a few more days. I need to be able to tell him in my own time."

Lisbon looked at Greer with concern.

"Greer, you do realise, the longer you wait, the harder it's going to be."

"I know! I know… I'm being selfish… but I just want a couple more days. I'm sorry Teresa… this is exactly why I tried to hide this from you." Greer looked down at her hands. She had made a mess of everything.

"I'm glad you told me in the end. I can help. Patrick Jane is not easily deterred… well once an idea gets in his head, he'll stop at nothing. He can read _me_ like an open book… you have to be careful… we have to be careful."

Lisbon leaned back, pinching the bridge of her nose.

"I'll get you some aspirin." Greer said standing up and making her way to the kitchen.

"Thanks." Lisbon said gratefully, leaning against the back of the couch. "How much did you end up drinking last night?"

"I only had the one." Greer replied.

"So your saying that I managed to drink almost two thirds of a bottle of scotch last night?"

"Yeah… I guess I am…"

Greer returned with the pills and a glass of water. Lisbon nodded her thanks.

"Oh… god. Jane's going to be so annoyed! He's done so much the last week or so, trying to help me.. and in just one night…"

"Teresa. I'll keep your secret from him too… it's the least I can do. You were great last night…" a sly grin showed on her face "up until about two, when you passed out on the couch."

Lisbon groaned. Her stomach was rolling, obviously the water was a bad idea.

"Teresa… are you ok?"

Less than half a second later, Lisbon found herself with her head in the bucket, throwing her guts up. Greer patted her awkwardly on the back. Lisbon retched one more time before leaning against the back of the couch again, eyes closed, with her hands clasped to her abdomen.

"How do you do this all the time? How can you handle the hangover every morning?"

Lisbon groaned.

"I don't know." She moaned. "All I know is I swear I'm never going to drink again, then by the evening, I'm at it again."

Greer patted her sympathetically on the arm.

"What about hypnosis? I'm sure Patrick would be happy to help."

"How do you know he hypnotises people?"

"Oh… he showed me once." She smiled sheepishly. "On Rigsby."

"Oh really." Lisbon said in an icy tone. She opened her eyes. "But no. I don't like the idea of someone digging around inside of my mind. Let alone Jane."

Greer smiled to herself. She knew exactly why Teresa didn't want Patrick inside her mind. She was scared he would find out _things. _Things that would embarrass the crap out of her if someone knew about. But really, if Patrick did know, it wouldn't exactly matter, because Greer was sure he had the same secret.

"What time is Jane due here?" Lisbon asked, standing up to dispose of the bucket.

"In about half an hour." Greer replied and Lisbon walked back into the room, bucket free.

"Half an hour? Shit."

"It's ok Lisbon… we can just pass it off as a tummy bug or something… say the Chinese didn't agree with you or something."

"Yeah… yeah you're right…" Lisbon said, sitting back down beside Greer.

"I think a rest day would be good for all of us. I know both of you have been through a lot the last week."

"And, not to mention how last night turned out for you." Greer nodded. "What brought that on?"

Greer shrugged her shoulders.

"I was upset. I spent the first half of the night crying… I guess I got myself that worked up that I induced an episode."

"Oh, Greer." Lisbon said softly. "Why were you so upset?"

"The guilt. Just everything. Everything started building up. I see how much you and Jane care about each other, and I see how much pain he is in, and now I'm just going to make it worse." She started fidgeting with her nails.

"But Greer, it's not your fault. You didn't know about Red John, about his family. You weren't to know what kind of past he had." Lisbon reached out and patted the girl on the arm. She knew she had meant well. And she knew that this was hurting her almost as much as it was going to hurt Jane.

"I know, but I still can't help but feel like I'm ripping his heart out all over again. This is going to hurt him."

"Yes it will, but he's going to be ok. Eventually."

Greer look at Lisbon, her eyes serious.

"Teresa, you need to be there for him. You're going to have to be his shoulder. You understand? I'm counting on you to look after him… after… when I'm gone."

"I will Greer. I will."

Lisbon felt a soft tear trail down her cheek.

"It will be ok Teresa. It has to be." Greer said, almost as if she was more trying to convince herself than Lisbon.

"I know it will. It will take time, but Greer… don't feel too guilty. You've given Jane something he hasn't been able to find in eight years. You've given him hope. And I don't think he had even realised he was still capable of feeling that way."

"Thanks Teresa."

They sat there in silence a little longer, both lost in thought. Greer was the first one to break the silence.

"Well, Patrick will be here soon, and if we're going to pass your sickness off as a stomach bug, well we have some work to do."

Greer got up and started clearing the scotch glasses. Lisbon smiled gratefully at the girl and stood up again to help.

Soon the scotch bottle was cleared and the bucket was cleaned and back at the head of the couch. They had chucked a few more blankets on the couch and popped more pillows at either end.

Lisbon sat down on the couch in defeat. She was exhausted.

"Well at least you look sick." Greer smirked at her.

"Yeah… so do you. Which helps my Chinese food excuse."

"Yeah, I guess it does… but Lisbon, you really don't look well. You really need to try to stop."

"I am trying, Greer. Last night I just couldn't though."

"I understand Lisbon. Just look after yourself ae."

"I'll have to." Lisbon lay back on the couch, snuggling under the covers.

Greer nodded, understanding what she was thinking. Soon she would have to look after Jane as well, and her being drunk or hungover all of the time, wasn't going to help Jane very much.

"Patrick will be here soon." Greer said before disappearing into the bathroom, returning with a damp facecloth.

"Final touch." She said placing the cold cloth of Lisbon's forehead. Lisbon sighed when the cloth brought a little relief to her headache. She had vomited the aspirin back up and she wasn't sure she wanted to try to take more.

"Thank you Greer. But really, you should be the one resting… not me."

"Teresa, don't feel guilty. For as long as I am able, I'm going to lead as much of a normal life as possible. And that doesn't include lying down and resting all of the time. It's not going to change anything."

Lisbon sighed. She hated this. She was too young. Aside from a few dark rings under her eyes and a pale complexion, she looked like a normal healthy teenager. It was then a thought came to her.

"Greer?"

"Yeah?"

"Don't take this the wrong way, but are you wearing a wig?" she asked timidly.

Greer smiled nervously.

"I was wondering when that was going to come up." She lifted her hands to her head, pulling of her long golden locks. In place, much shorter, thinner curls covered the top of her head. "I chose the wig that mostly resembled my own hair― before the chemo that is." She pulled the wig back in place.

Lisbon nodded. She was at a slight loss for words. She was saved by a knock at the door.

"That will be Patrick. Pretend to sleep or something." Greer whispered.

_Well that's going to be easy enough. _Lisbon thought, as she was currently fighting to keep her eyes open. Her stomach still felt uncomfortable, groaning she rolled onto her back, adjusted the cloth and closed her eyes.

Greer greeted Patrick at the door. He smiled a huge smile at her, which she returned whole-heartedly.

Greer stood aside to let him in, signalling at the same time for him to be quiet.

"What's going on? Jane asked in a whisper.

"Lisbon's not well… I think it was the Chinese food from last night. She's was up half the night." Greer replied, quite proud of herself, seeing as this was mostly true.

"Oh.. that's no good at all. Is she ok?" Jane asked, a flicker of worry in his voice. Greer smiled internally, this only proved they cared for each other.

"Yeah she's ok I guess. As ok as anyone would be if they had been throwing up their stomach contents for about five hours." She replied with a hint of sarcasm. "She's carked it on the couch. So I was thinking, maybe we could have a movie day or something?"

"That sounds like a great idea!" Jane said smiling. "It would be great to be able to do nothing for once." He stated.

They made their way into the lounge to which Jane was greeted by a very sickly looking Lisbon.

"Jane…" she cracked. "I'm sorry. I hope you didn't have anything planned for today."

"No, no Lisbon. A movie day sounds great." He moved towards the couch, sitting on the coffee table in front of her.

"You ok?" he asked again.

"Yeah… I'm ok. Sore stomach, sore head." She mumbled. Greer watched amused, Lisbon really was good at making Jane concerned about her. She knew she wasn't feeling well, but she still thought she was doing a fantastic job of making herself seem sicker than she was. Jane reached out unconsciously, placing his hand on her cheek.

"Hmmm… you do feel a little warm. But I see Greer has you covered." He said motioning towards the cloth.

Lisbon nodded.

"Greer has taken great care of me." She confirmed, catching Greer's eye.

"That's good. I'm glad you weren't alone last night when it hit." He brushed her cheek once more before returning his gaze to Greer. "Why don't you pick out a movie? They're just in that cupboard." Jane said pointing to the cupboard under the TV.

"How do you know where I keep my movies?" Lisbon asked questioningly.

"The night I stayed here, I confess I may have watch a couple." Jane smiled at her.

They watched Greer pick through the movies before she pulled out a black and orange DVD cover.

"I've never seen this before." Greer said holding up the cover.

_Chicago._

"You've never seen Chicago?" Lisbon asked from the couch.

"No… I've only ever heard of it."

Jane motioned for Greer to set it up, before he stood up, moved to the head of the couch, where he lifted Lisbon gently by the shoulders.

"Jane? What are you doing?" she squeaked.

"Just trying to make you a little more comfortable." He replied as he sat down, pulling up so she was cradled against his chest. "Just relax." He ordered and she did.

Greer bent her head and started smiling. She finished setting the movie up and turned to sit on the recliner.

They had only made it through the first number of "_All That Jazz" _before Jane felt Lisbon relax into him. He looked down and smiled at the sleeping woman.

Throughout the movie. Jane kept looking over at Greer. He could see how much she was loving the singing and dancing. He would have to take her to the theatre one day.

When the movie finished and Greer had turned the TV off, Jane carefully shifted Lisbon so he could look at Greer properly.

"I was looking at houses this morning. I found a great two bedroom place near the CBI. It would be close for me to go to work and when you come and see me you'll have a place to live. I know you will have to go home to see your mother… but I do hope you will come and see me regularly."

"Yeah… of course I will." Greer smiled, her mask firmly in place. She was holding onto it as if it were a life line. He was planning… _Oh god!_

"Maybe, once you know what you want to do, you could go to a university near here." Jane said excitedly.

"Yeah. Maybe I could!" Greer said, acting excited also.

Lisbon was lying in Jane's lap with her eyes still closed. As far as they knew, she was still asleep. _Shit. He was planning. He was planning a future he was never going to get, because his daughter has cancer._ _Jane was going to be destroyed when he found out… and she was keeping this from him. With each passing second it was only going to get harder… on all three of them._ Lisbon fought back the tears that were threatening to spill down her cheeks.

"I can't wait to build a life with you." Jane said.

That did it. She couldn't hold it in any longer. She mock grabbed her stomach and put a hand to her mouth before she bolted for the bathroom. Slamming the door and locking it behind her. She heard Jane say he would go in and check on her. She turned the tap on to drown out the sound of her sobs.

Her best friend was going to breakdown, and she was going to be the one that had to pick up the pieces. A strangled sob escaped her throat. Why couldn't someone just cut the poor guy a break. He had already lost his family once, and now he was going to have to lose it all over again.

She heard a small knock at the door. She stayed silent, knowing full well she couldn't let Jane see her like this. He would ask questions.

"Teresa? Its Greer… can I come in?"

At the sound of Greer's voice, Lisbon got up and let the girl inside, she locked the door behind her.

As soon as the door was shut, Lisbon found herself sitting on the floor, sobbing into Greer's shoulder. She didn't cry out loud often, only when she was in a great deal of pain. After a few minutes, she seemed to compose herself and she pulled away from Greer's embrace.

"I'm sorry." She said dumbly.

"It's ok Teresa. It gave me a chance to get out for a moment too."

Lisbon looked up, noticing Greer's tear stained cheeks and red eyes.

"This is so unfair! You're too young! And this just isn't fair on him! Can't they just cut him a break?"

Greer hung her head.

"Nothing seems to be fair. This all sucks." She said gloomily.

Lisbon took a deep breath, calming herself.

"Greer, I will keep my promise, I won't tell him, but you need to do it soon. You're only going to hurt him more, the longer you wait."

"I know… a few more days. Then I'll tell him. Ok?"

Lisbon nodded.

There was a light knock at the door.

"Is everything ok in there?" Jane asked nervously.

"Yeah!" Greer called back over the sound of the taps. "Teresa's pretty sick… just give us a few more moments."

"Ok…" Jane called back. "Let me know if you need me to do anything."

"Will do!"

Greer look back at Lisbon's pale face. "Ok, the red eyes could pass from you being sick, but you've got no sweat on your face…" she held out her hand, pulling Lisbon to her feet. "Splash your face with cold water… make sure you dampen your hairline."

Lisbon did as instructed and then took the towel Greer offered to her.

"Pat your face.. don't dry it completely."

Lisbon did as asked.

"There you go. Now you look like you've been throwing up." Greer laughed half-heartedly. Greer looked at herself in the mirror. Her eyes were a little red, but she could pass that off for being tired.

"You ready?" Greer asked the still silent Lisbon.

Lisbon only nodded in response. She was meant to be the strong one. The leader… but she felt like she was letting everybody down. She felt weak… vulnerable.

They walked out of the bathroom and back into the lounge, where a worried Jane was sitting on the couch.

"Are you ok?" he asked, standing as soon as he saw them.

She nodded in response. He escorted her back to the couch, sitting down beside her and timidly rubbing her back.

"Thanks for taking care of her Greer." Jane said, his eyes not leaving Lisbon's face.

"I think I need to go to bed." Lisbon croaked.

Jane agreed and helped her stand up, leading her towards the staircase. They reached her bedroom and she collapsed into her bed.

"Thanks Patrick." She said once she was safely inside her bed.

"No problem Teresa. Get better." He brushed his hand across her forehead before leaving, closing the door quietly.

Lisbon sighed as soon as he had left. She hated lying to him. But she had promised Greer and she intended to keep her word. She wasn't sure what she was more anxious about, lying to him, or how he would act when he found out. Lisbon was going to have to tread very carefully over the next few days. This was definitely going to be harder than she had thought.


	13. Chapter 12

**A/N I am sooo sorry for the delay! I have been so busy, back at school now =( terrible terrible… but hey no excuses.. so I'm really sorry!**

**BIG thanks to DanH2010.. this chapter wouldn't have made it up without you.**

**Also big hugs and kisses to all of my readers and reviewers.. you are all AMAZING!x**

**Again… I apologize for any mistakes this chappie may have.. not all of the buttons seem to be working on my laptop :\**

**But anyway… enjoy =]**

There was a warm breeze on Lisbon's neck. It came in short bursts, leaving a tingling sensation after each wave. She was nuzzled into something soft. Lisbon cracked her eyes open to see a pillow had been placed into her welcoming arms. _But what was that breeze? _She slowly looked over her shoulder, looking at the other side of the bed.

She jumped slightly in fright, when a certain blonde haired consultant's face, was pressed directly into her gaze.

She lay her head back on her pillow in confusion, Jane's warm breath returning to her neck. She lay there in a haze of uncertainty for a while. W_hy was he in her bed? _After lying there contemplating about ten different reasons as to why her consultant was lying there with her, she felt a sudden temptation to watch Jane sleep. Silently and carefully, she turned over so she was facing him, their faces just inches apart. Jane was lying on top of her bed, his vest, jacket and shoes had been discarded to a neat pile on her floor. He had pulled a blanket out of the linen cupboard and was currently nuzzled into the fabric.

Lisbon looked at him in wonder. His face held the innocence of a sleeping child, all worry lines smoothed out into a peaceful demeanour. Lisbon had never seen him sleeping so soundly, he always looked fitful whilst sleeping on her couch at the CBI.

His hair was in a curled mess at the top of his head, and Lisbon couldn't resist the urge to run her fingers through his golden locks. She brushed some curls off his forehead before running her hand softly through the hair on the side of his head. He smiled when she did this. Her hand shot off his head as if she had been electrocuted, his smiling face made her think he had woken. He sniffled once before he snuggled back into the pillow. Lisbon lay there in shocked silence, before she realised he had been smiling in his sleep. She reached out again and started stroking him like a cat on the side of his head. His peaceful expression transformed into a lazy grin.

Lisbon lay there astonished, her hand still resting on his head. She had found Patrick Jane's calming factor. He who knows everything about someone just by looking at them, can hypnotise anyone, Mr cool demeanour… has a calming factor. It was almost too ridiculous to believe.

She removed her hand and lay back, staring at the ceiling, smiling. She felt she had finally gained a point against Patrick Jane. The thought actually made her feel a little excited. She felt Jane stretch beside her. He had rubbed his face of sleep and yawned before she had the courage to look at him.

"Morning Lisbon." He said rather cheerfully considering he was still slightly groggy, seeing as his body wasn't used to sleeping properly.

"Morning Jane." she said returning a small confused smile. She was still unsure why he was in her bed at this hour… or why he was in her bed at all.

He turned so he was on his side, propped up against his elbow, facing her.

"How are you feeling?" he asked gently.

It was then the memories of the previous night came back to her. She felt that all too familiar ache start to grow in her chest again.

"Yeah, better… I think. Tired." She replied.

"I can't imagine why." He said, a hint of sarcasm playing on his words.

"What do you mean?" Lisbon asked, slightly confused.

"Well, you were up all night vomiting the night before last… and you were quite… restless, in your sleeping last night."

"How do you mean I was restless?" she asked, hugging the pillow closer.

"Well, let's just say you didn't fall asleep with the pillow in your arms." Jane noted Lisbon still confused stare. "I never thought you to be a cuddler Lisbon." He grinned wickedly.

Lisbon stared down at the pillow horrified. She must have made a move on Jane in the night, and her modest "I'm going to sleep on top of the covers" consultant, must have thrust the pillow into her arms in place of him.

It was then Lisbon realised, that this must be the first time he had shared a bed with another woman, since his wife. His dead wife. His dead wife that he's still in love with and is still grieving for. Lisbon instantly felt bad and embarrassed.

Jane was watching the turmoil of thoughts going through Lisbon's mind.

"Lisbon, it's ok. It was nice… just slightly inappropriate." He winked at her.

She groaned.

"Jane if you were just trying to make me feel better… you did a really bad job." A thought crossed Lisbon's mind. "What are you doing in my bed anyway?"

This took Jane by slight surprise, but he managed to save himself just in time.

"Well, my dear Lisbon, clearly I am not actually in your bed, but merely on top of it. But the reason?" his voice grew a little softer. "I didn't want you to get sick in the night and be by yourself. You're by yourself too much."

She looked away from him.

"Lisbon?" he asked in a slightly concerned tone.

"Don't." she whispered.

He reached out and touched her shoulder.

"Teresa?" he spoke gently, his voice low and calm.

Lisbon shook her head. She gathered her legs in her arms and rested her chin on her knees. Her thoughts were rushing around inside her mind. He was getting to personal again. It had been over a week since she had found herself sitting by him on the couch at the CBI. She had told him that she was sick of being alone, and here he was bringing up the matter as if it had never been addressed before.

"Jane.. I know I'm by myself too much. I'm always by myself. We've had this conversation before."

Jane silently cursed. Now he remembered. It was the day after Lisbon had arrested Greer, his mind was still a little foggy around that time. Sleep deprivation maybe?

"Lisbon, I'm sorry…"

"No, Jane.. you don't need to be sorry. It's my own fault. I've been by myself from such a young age. Losing my parents so young, I learnt a different perspective on life. I learnt that the only person I can ever truly rely on is myself. So I focus solely on my job… if I had more free time… I feel I would spin off into an emotional breakdown. I can't let myself stop… I can't let myself see how lonely my life has truly become."

Jane hung his head. He knew Lisbon was broken, he just hadn't realised how bad she was. She was almost beyond fixing. Especially if she didn't beat this addiction. _But so far so good… right?_

"Teresa… you don't need to be alone. I'm here for you. Greer's here for you... I'm going to need help with Greer… you can help me."

Lisbon couldn't help the two tears that trailed down her cheeks. She hated lying to him.

"Lisbon, you once told me that we're a family. You are my family. I need you to know that I am here."

"Jane…"

"Me, you and Greer.. we can build a proper life.. well as proper as we can. It will all work out… I promise."

Lisbon didn't know how to react. Here was her best friend, practically offering her a life… where he didn't have a life to offer her. He had no idea what he was going to find out soon, what he was going to lose.

"Jane.. stop. Please." She looked down, trying her best to keep the rest of her tears hostage.

"Teresa. You don't need to feel like this. You. Are. Not. Alone."

"Jane! Please stop!"

Lisbon stood up and walked away from the bed.

"I see what you're doing Lisbon."

She stopped dead in her tracks. Had he figured it out? About the cancer? The alcohol?

"You need to stop pushing people away. It's half the reason you're by yourself."

Lisbon turned around to face him, a death glare plastered on her face.

"You have no idea." She said coldly. "You don't know how hard I try." She wiped a stray tear from her cheek. "You overstepped a line there Jane. That one cut deep."

She was halfway out the door before Jane had reached her. He grabbed onto her arm gently, turning her to face him.

"Stop pushing me away."

"Stop pushing _me _away." She retorted.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked, taking a step backwards.

"Jane, every personal thing I know about you, I have learnt from your file."

"That's not true." He whispered sadly. He had to have known she was only going to turn this around on him. It was Lisbon. She was amazing at avoiding unwanted conversations.

"Oh, yeah? Name one thing that you have told me. Not something I've learnt from someone else."

"I told you about my time spent in the hospital." He replied quietly.

"That's one thing. You're meant to be a friend, and yet… I know nothing about you."

"Lisbon, you only asked me to tell you one thing."

"Tell me another then."

Jane was silent for a moment, before he answered in a sad voice.

"I told you I would always be there for you. In that moment of our lives, I was most sincere. I meant it. And I still mean it now."

Jane stared into Lisbon's face. She folded her arms across herself in attempt to shield herself from his protective gaze.

"Jane…"

She wanted to tell him about Greer. Here he was telling her how he was always going to be there for her… he had no idea what he was going to go through in the next few weeks. He had no clue as to how much he would be needing _her. _ She could only hope that when the time came, and he found out she had kept this from him… that he could ever forgive her?

"Lisbon… I don't want to fight… I'm sorry. But really… that's why I was in your bed anyway… no funny business." He smiled then, and all was forgiven.

There was nothing like a Jane smile. His face lights up.. and all her worries seem to float away.

They moved back and sat on the end of her bed.

"I'm taking Greer to the carnival today… would you like to come?"

Lisbon mulled it over for a bit. She was pretty sure Greer would like some alone time with her father… and considering she was still meant to be getting over a stomach bug…

"Thanks Jane, but I think I might just hang out here today. I'm still not feeling one hundred percent and I think it would be a good idea for you and Greer to get out of the house. Greer hasn't exactly been outside a whole lot lately." She smiled nervously at him. She still wasn't sure if he had completely forgiven her for arresting Greer. But he only returned the smile.

"Ok Lisbon. You get some rest. I'll bring her back for tea, if that's alright?"

"Yeah that's fine Jane… would you like to stay for dinner tonight as well?"

He smiled at her nervous school girl expression.

"Sure Lisbon. That would be nice."

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Jane and Greer arrived at the carnival just after noon. It had been a while since Jane had been to a carnival, and as soon as they got there, he had mixed feelings, of being an intruder in his old world… to feeling right at home. The smells, the sounds, the sights… everything was familiar to him.

Jane had dressed down from his normal three piece attire, leaving his vest and jacket at Lisbon's.

Greer took in her surroundings, a expression of delight plastered on her face. They walked side by side through the busy stalls, not saying a lot, but not needing to either. They seemed to be having their own silent conversation.

Jane ordered them both a hotdog and bottled water and they went and sat down at one of the many park benches.

"Tell me a bit about your childhood." Greer asked in between mouthfuls.

Jane looked at her amused. He already knew she had picked up on his familiarity of the place, it was only natural she would want to know more. He stared into her expectant face.

"Well, I grew up as a carny, believe it or not."

Greer smiled triumphantly.

"Ah-huh! I knew it. Which one?"

"Well… this one actually." He grinned nervously at her.

"Wow… does that mean you could introduce me to some of your friends and family?" she asked excitedly.

"Ahh… sure Greer… I don't see why not?"

"Great!"

They sat there in a friendly silence while they finished off their lunch. Greer, who seemed to eat a lot faster than Jane, relaxed back against the bench and took in her surroundings. There were mothers being dragged around by their children. There were children fighting with their parents and siblings over where they wanted to go next. There were couples walking hand in hand…

Greer glanced over at one of the stalls, where a sandy haired boy was looking at her. He was quite tall and looked about her age. He seemed to be one of the people who felt most comfortable here… _almost as comfortable as Patrick looks… he must live with these people._ Greer thought to herself. She smiled shyly at him, and he returned the grin with a little more confidence.

"Nature calls." Jane said, breaking her out of her trance.

"Sorry? What?" she asked him.

He smiled sheepishly at her.

"Bathroom."

"Oh… right." She felt like laughing hysterically for some reason.

She got up and followed Jane to one of the bathroom stalls.

"Be back in a moment." He almost sung. "Watch out for strangers."

She laughed at his disappearing back. As she turned around, she felt herself collide with something soft. She looked down to see a round midsection dressed in a pinstriped jacket. Directing her gaze upwards, the owner of the midsection and jacket was staring down at her. He looked neither friendly, nor unfriendly. He was wearing a black top hat and had a wirery black moustache.

"Oh.. pardon me.." Greer apologized.

"Oh! No need to apologize young lady!" he bellowed. "Just come and see my show later!" he exclaimed, producing a purple ticket, out of what seemed to be thin air.

Greer looked down at it. "The Trick of the Mind". Greer smiled to herself. _This must be one of Patrick's associates. _She looked up to see the man retreating towards one of the tents.

"Excuse me!" she called out to the man. He turned and looked at her, mischief in his eyes. "May I please have another ticket? It's for my father."

"Why of course, young madam!" he pulled out another ticket and gave it to Greer.

Greer ran forward and gave the man a hug.

"Thank you so much sir! You're so kind!"

He looked down in surprise.

"That's no problem." He winked at her, then disappeared into a tent.

Greer walked back to the bathroom stall to wait for Patrick. He walked out a few minutes later, drying his hands on his pants.

"Better?" she asked jokingly.

"Much." He said almost embarrassed. But hey.. he's only human. "Ok, so you wanted to meet some people?"

"I'd love that." Greer smiled widely.

They made their way through the crowd, stopping in a few tents. The third tent they went to they were greeted by an excited scream.

"Oh my lord! It cant be!"

Jane smiled a 'here I am' smile.

"It can't be my Paddy Jane!"

Jane walked over and embraced the lady in a family-type hug.

"Hello Linda. Long time no see." At that comment she poked him in the ribs. Jane jumped back with a high pitched ow!

"What was that for?" Jane whined, rubbing his sore rib.

"Long time no see indeed. I haven't seen you for nearly ten years boy!"

He stepped back, bowing his head slightly.

"I'm sorry Linda. A lot has happened since I saw you last."

"I know Paddy, I know."

Greer stood there watching the scene in front of her. Linda seemed to be telling Patrick off as if he were a child. She stifled a grin at Patricks apologetic face. He looked like he had been a naughty boy… broken the vase playing football in the house or something, and Linda was telling him off… the look on his face was ridiculous on a man his age. Her smile wavered slightly when she realised the attention had been turned onto her.

"Now who might this lovely young lady be?"

"Linda, this is my daughter."

A confused and sad look crossed Linda's face.

"But Paddy? Your daughter's―"

"―Greer. This is Greer." He cut her off.

She controlled her emotions a little before replying.

"Ohh! Paddy you _have_ been a naughty boy!"

"Linda!" He laughed slightly, brushing off her blush worthy actions. "Linda, she's seventeen. I only met her a week or so ago."

"Oh..?"

"You remember Tracy Thomson?"

"Oh.. yes.. I do, I do! She was the 'friend' right?"

"Yes Linda."

"So much for just friends!" she laughed.

"Linda." he warned.

Linda's laughing was only interrupted by a loud booming voice coming from the tent entrance.

"Paddy Junior! I thought that was you!"

"Boris!"

Jane was at the other side of the tent in three strides, embracing the larger man.

Greer looked over and realised the man Jane was hugging was the same one she had bumped into earlier. Boris strode over to where Greer was standing.

"Now, this must be the young lady I've been hearing talk about." He smiled, digging around in his many pockets for something. He produced her cell phone out of his left pant pocket. Jane looked at the man angrily.

"When did you steal her phone?" he asked a little disgruntled, knowing full well he would have had to have taken it from her from close contact.

"Now, now, Paddy… I saw her with you when you went into the bathroom, she's the splitting image of you."

"Patrick, it's ok." Greer said, fishing around in her own pocket. She pulled out the man's wallet. "I'm not as naive as you think." She smiled victoriously at Jane, who looked absolutely bewildered. Bewilderment turned to pride.

"Ha! If she didn't look so much like you… you would have had to have been related somehow… she's just as devious as you!" Boris exclaimed happily. They traded items back to their rightful owners.

"Oh! There's Danny." Linda said.

Standing in the door of the tent, was the sandy haired boy Greer had seen earlier. They stared at each other, slightly mesmerised.

Linda, noticing the romantic interest between the two teenagers, carted Jane and Boris out the back to play a game of chess.

Before she knew it, Greer found herself on the Ferris Wheel with a complete stranger… but a handsome stranger at that.

They talked for a while, conversation coming easy. Greer told Danny how she went looking for her father, and how she only found Jane a week ago. Danny told her how he didn't know who his real parents were. He had been left on the side of the road as a baby, and the circus had picked him up. Linda had practically raised him. He told her he had met Jane a couple of times when he was younger but never really had got the chance to get to know him.

They stopped at the top of the Ferris Wheel and looked at each other. Greer noted that Danny had that look about him. She knew he wanted a kiss… and she was just as keen as he was. They lent in, only closing the distance for a small, sweet while. When they broke apart, Greer couldn't help but flush a deep red. The Ferris Wheel started moving again.

As they were getting off, Danny slipped something into her hand. He leant in and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek, before departing back for the tent. Inside her hand was a purple piece of paper with his phone number on it. She felt a wave of pride rushed over her. She looked after him, but he had disappeared into the tent, she could see Patrick walking out, looking for her. She looked down at the paper and brought a hand to her forehead. She stopped dead in her tracks, a wash of self pity and anger raged through her. Her wig had been sticking to her forehead.

She wanted to scream.

Walking over to the nearest bin, she threw out the number. What did she need it for anyway? She wasn't about to drag anyone else down with her.

She saw Jane's smiling face walking towards her and felt instantly bad.

She was going to have to tell him soon. Teresa was right. The longer she waited. The harder it was going to be.

She took a few deep breaths, trying to compose her tears that threatened to spill over. She plastered a fake grin on her face and strode towards Patrick. He wouldn't be smiling for much longer.


	14. Chapter 13

**A/N I apologize for the delay.. busy busy. but for those of you who have stuck with this story.. I'm really grateful!**

** I hope you enjoy this chapter =]**

The journey home felt as if it was taking forever. There was a heavy silence that hung in the air, like bitter waves of ice cold water. Greer couldn't find the strength to look at him. She was looking out the window, her body turned as far as she could in her seat. She was stewing. She knew she needed to tell him, she just couldn't find the courage.

Being with Danny and having that small moment of normal human interaction, that small piece of teenage solitude, it had made her so happy, but as soon as she realised what she was doing… she knew she couldn't bring another down with her.

Already she was ruining people's lives. Her mother, her friends- who she never saw anymore because she felt she needed to distance herself from human contact- Teresa… and soon, Patrick. She didn't like to obsess in self pity, she hated to feel as if she was more important than she is. Thinking that she is ruining people's lives, makes her feel like a spoilt child, like she is the most important person in the world. She knows she isn't. She knows eventually everyone would move on… god, she hopes to hell that they do. But she has to be realistic. She knows this is going to crush many people.

She knows this is going to draw Jane over the edge.

She wants to talk to Teresa… and she needs to talk to her alone.

Greer sighed. She also misses her mom. No matter how hard her mom had tried to stop her from coming, she knew it was only for her own good… and maybe for Patrick's own good too.

She could sense him watching her out of the corner of his eye. He knows something is up. He isn't stupid… far from it really. But she can't bring herself to justify any reason, or craft any lie. She's far too exhausted.

She just continued to stare out the window, a lively soul, trapped in a dying body.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

They arrived back at Lisbon's apartment just before dark. Jane stopped the car, but did not make a move to get out of the vehicle. With his seatbelt still on and his hands still clasped tightly to the steering wheel, he sat, staring out the front widow.

He knew something was up, but he couldn't bear to press the issue. He didn't want to push her too far. He had no idea how to handle teenage girls… let alone his teenage daughter. He could tell she was stressed. She would tell him in her own time. But he really wanted to be there for her at the same time. He needed to prove to her that he could be… he also needed to prove it to himself.

Greer sat nervously, fiddling with her seatbelt. After a few moments, she released herself and looked at Patrick for the first time since they got in the car. He had a blank expression on his face. He almost looked hurt. She could feel the tears threatening behind her lashes. She cleared her throat.

"Thank you for the day, Patrick…" She looked down at her hands, which were place on her lap. "I had fun."

With that she got out of the car and almost ran into the apartment. She could feel the tears coming at more force now. When she got to the front door, she didn't even hesitate to open it, she just stormed on in, past a confused Lisbon, who was folding up the laundry, and straight into the bathroom. She locked the door behind her before she let the tears escape properly. She grabbed a towel and buried her face in it, trying to mask her tears.

She heard a soft knock at the door.

"Greer?" It was Lisbon.

She stayed silent. She needed a moment to try and compose herself a little more. She wanted her mother.

The knock came again. Silence again. She heard Lisbon's footsteps move away and she pulled out her cell phone, dialling that all too familiar number.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Lisbon had been folding up her laundry when she heard the car pull up. She smiled slightly to herself, knowing full well she was in for some entertaining stories. But when Greer came storming through the door, heading straight for the bathroom, Lisbon thought the worst. Had Greer told him?

She softly padded over to the bathroom door, hearing the muffled sobs. She knocked quietly.

"Greer?"

She didn't get an answer.

She tried knocking again.

Still no answer. Walking away from the bathroom door, Lisbon decided she would go and check on Jane. If she had told him, he would be a complete mess right now.

She made her way out of the apartment in search of Jane. She found him sitting in his car, seatbelt still on and hands clasped to the steering wheel. He wasn't upset. Well she wouldn't exactly say he was fine, but he wasn't crying or angry or anything. He was just staring blankly out the window. Was he in shock?

Lisbon made her way over to the car and opened his door. She knelt down beside him.

"Jane? Are you alright?"

He didn't respond.

She reached out and touched him lightly on the shoulder.

"Jane?" she said a little more forcefully.

This seemed to rouse him from whatever stupor he was in.

He looked at her, his eyes misted with confusion.

"I have no idea what I'm doing Lisbon."

Lisbon sighed. Whether it be from relief or remorse she wasn't sure. So she hadn't told him.

"What do you mean Jane?"

He sighed, his arms dropping to his lap with a small thud.

"One moment everything was fine. I introduced her to a couple of my friends, then she went on the Ferris Wheel with young Danny, next thing I know, we're sitting in the car and she won't look or talk to me. I don't even know what I did."

It was then Lisbon realised she must have liked this boy. Even worse, this boy must have liked her… and she didn't want to hurt anyone else.

"Jane, she's a teenager. Even worse she's a teenage girl… who you've only known for a week. Give yourself some credit. You not _meant _to know what you're doing."

Jane smiled weakly.

"Hey… I haven't had a chance to cook anything… would you mind terribly if I asked you to go and get some takeout?"

He nodded.

"Sure. What would you like?"

Lisbon thought for a moment.

"Ummm… anything greasy." She smiled wickedly, knowing full well that's all he would have been eating all day. He made a sickly face at her.

"Ok then. Greasy for you… salad for me. I have enough grease in my system to keep all of my bones squeak free for the rest of my life." He patted his belly. "I'll be back soon."

She stood up and shut his car door for him. As soon as he was out of sight, she retreated back into the apartment. She closed the front door softly, before making her way slowly back to the bathroom door. She could hear voices… well one voice. Greer must be on the phone. She narrowed the final gap to the door and listened.

"Mom, please come and get me."

Greer was crying.

"I want to come home. It's all getting so hard. He's just so nice… and all I'm going to do is hurt him even more." There was a pause as Tracy replied, and Lisbon was slightly frustrated that she couldn't hear what she was saying. "I know I brought this on myself! But it's not my fault I wanted to get to know him." Another pause. Lisbon felt kind of angry. By the sounds of things Tracy was lecturing Greer, when all the girl needed was a bit of support. She heard Greer sigh. Relief? "Thanks mom. I'll see you soon then?" Pause. "Ok, I love you too. Bye."

She heard Greer put the phone down and blow her nose.

Lisbon tentatively knocked on the door again.

"Greer? Greer, honey please open the door."

There was a shuffling from inside and a soft click, before a tear ridden Greer opened the door. Lisbon scooted into the bathroom. This seemed to have turned into their meeting place.

She took her usual spot, sitting with her back up against the tub. It wasn't long before Greer joined her.

"Patrick?"

"He went to get dinner."

Greer nodded sadly.

"It was a great day. I had so much fun with him. I've ruined everything. Haven't I?"

"No Greer. He's just a little confused. He can sense something is wrong, but he doesn't know what. He wants to be there for you."

"I know. I just don't know how to tell him."

"The right words will come to you. But Greer. I've told you so many times, it's only going to get harder. The longer you wait."

Greer stayed silent. She already knew this.

"Greer, I heard you talking… is your mom coming to get you?"

"Yes." Greer whispered.

"But Jane..?"

"I will tell him. But I think I need my mom to be there."

"Will you leave? After you tell him."

"I had my first kiss today." Greer said, almost disregarding the subject. She didn't want to talk about this. She didn't know what was going to happen over the next few days. She was staring straight ahead, eyes stilled in memory.

"Oh." Was all Lisbon could respond with.

"It was wonderful." Greer sighed. "Teresa? Can I ask you a question?"

Lisbon shifted, leaning her head against the side of the tub.

"Of course, Greer."

"What's it like to fall in love?"

This took Lisbon by slight surprise. She closed her eyes, answering without thinking.

"It's like being hit on the head with a concrete block."

Lisbon opened her eyes, realising what she had said. Greer was staring at her, confused.

"But… I thought falling in love was meant to be wonderful? Magical…"

"Sometimes it is… other times. It's not."

Greer looked at her, knowing.

"I take this is from experience?"

"It's like, you look at this person, and they're the same, and yet… they're completely different. And you just can't figure out what's different about them. Then it hits you, and your entire world changes. Suddenly, they're all you see, all you can think about. You would change your entire world for them."

Greer was looking at her expectantly.

"Who have you fallen in love with Teresa?"

The spell Lisbon was under seemed to have broken and she snapped back to reality.

"Oh… that was a long time ago…"

"Whatever you say Teresa."

Lisbon was suddenly feeling uncomfortable.

"Let's get out of this bathroom. Jane will be home any moment." Lisbon stood up and helped Greer to her feet. They walked out into the apartment, just as they heard the car pull up. Greer sat on the couch and Lisbon went back to folding her laundry.

Jane walked in the door moments later, nursing a bag of Thai for the girls and as promised, a salad for him. Greer got up from the couch and went to help him serve the meal. She grabbed some plates out of the kitchen and placed them on the table. She turned around to see that he was staring at her. She looked at him apologetically and he nodded in understanding.

Lisbon came over then and they all sat down to eat. Jane pulled out his salad and Greer made a face.

"What?" Jane asked mid-mouthful, noticing her questioning stare.

"Really? A salad?"

"What? I'm getting old. My body can't handle too much grease. Makes me sick for days."

"Ok, Patrick. Whatever you say." Greer grinned at him. Lisbon just shook her head. They were as bad as each other.

They finished the rest of their meal with idle chatter, Jane and Greer telling Lisbon about how Boris had taken Greer's cell phone and how Greer had taken his wallet in retaliation. Lisbon laughed at the appropriate times and commented when necessary, but her heart wasn't really in it. She couldn't stop thinking about Greer's question… _what's it like to fall in love._

Lisbon couldn't help but realise she had been hiding the truth… even from herself. She seemed to have only just figured out that she was, indeed in love, and the thought scared her to hell. She had no idea what to make of it. He was there for her whenever she needed him, and her vice-versa.

She sat there, trying to disregard the thought entirely. But seeing him sitting across the table from her, occasionally looking at her and smiling, that smile he seemed to save just for her… she couldn't help but feel a sense of self pride. She loved Patrick Jane. She didn't even know if the feelings were romantic. All she knew was she cared deeply for the man, and she knew she would do anything for him.

The next few months were going to be hell for him, and she knew in her heart that she was going to do everything in her being, to make him know that he isn't alone in this world. She will be there for him, she would take it as far as he would let her. She just prayed to god that he was going to forgive her for keeping this from him. She figured he would. It was Greer's wish, and he knew she was loyal. But she couldn't get rid of the guilt that had settled in her chest, things were going to change around here.

Lisbon wasn't sure if Jane was going to sought comfort or if he was going to hide away and keep all of his grief and pain to himself. It wouldn't be out of character. But they had grown so much closer over the last week. Eight years ago, he didn't have anyone to help him, he had to find it through professional help, this time would be different. She would be there when he found out.

"Lisbon? Lisssboon…"

She was brought out of her thoughts by Jane.

"Sorry what?"

He chuckled lightly.

"I was just wondering if you wanted desert? I bought cheesecake." He smiled his charming smile at her. She all but melted.

"Please."

She felt dizzy and she couldn't breathe properly. She couldn't take her eyes off of him. _Yup, definitely a concrete block._

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Lisbon got to the CBI the next morning before Jane or Geer had even thought about getting up. Jane had stayed at Lisbon's again, taking refuge on a stretcher bed in the lounge. She took the opportunity to complete the paperwork that was once again, piling up on her desk. She gave up after about half an hour. Her brain just couldn't concentrate. She kept remembering moments she had shared with Jane.

The time they danced together at the reunion. It was an innocent gesture, as he knew she loved the song, and yet, when she thought about it now, she couldn't help but remember him pulling her closer, and when she leant her head against his shoulder, he had rested his chin against the top of her head.

Or the time he had bought her strawberries as an apology. He had hugged her that day. The thought sent small shivers down her spine. How is it she had only just figured out how deep her affections ran for this man now? Then again, it's probably a good thing. It would have made life so much more complicated.

An hour or so, and many more memories later, said man and Greer walked into the CBI, they were the last to arrive, as the rest of the team had shown up. She felt a rush of excitement flowing through her. But as they came closer, the look on Jane's face, wasn't one of joy… he looked angry, no… he looked pissed off. Lisbon looked through her office window and saw Jane walking towards her, a nearly empty bottle of scotch in his hand. He stormed into her office, Greer hot on his heel.

"You've been drinking." He almost yelled. He was furious.

"Jane…"

"This was a full bottle of scotch Thursday night! And now, only four days later, its nearly empty! You told me you were going to stop!" His face was a mask of fury. Greer was standing in the doorway, looking frightened.

"Jane… please.. let me expl…"

"No! You don't get to talk. Not right now. I would have understood a couple of drinks… but you've been bingeing Lisbon! With my daughter in the house!" he was yelling now. Lisbon felt desperate. There was no way she could explain herself without letting Jane know of Greer's secret. She caught Greer's eye and they shared a look of desperation. "You weren't even sick the other day were you? Stomach bug? No! You were fucking hung-over!"

"Patrick!" It was Greer. She looked mortified at his language and the way he was treating Teresa. It was her fault she had drunk in the first place. She had seen the way they had been looking at each other last night. She had seen the way they acted around each other. She knew there was more than just friendship going on there, and now because of her, he was messing it up.

Jane turned to look at Greer.

"Please wait outside." He said a little quieter.

"No. You can't speak to her like that!"

"Outside. Now."

Greer looked at him, feeling hurt, before she directed her gaze at Lisbon. Lisbon could see the desperation on her face. She left the office and went over to Grace, who had heard the entire fight. They heard Jane slam the door and the sound of voices rose up through the bullpen.

"How could you Lisbon? With my daughter in the house!"

"Jane! You have no idea!" Lisbon was yelling too now. "If it wasn't for me _your_ _daughter _ would be sleeping in a motel room!"

"Yeah! And if it wasn't for you, I would have been able to spend more time with her! You arrested her because you got jealous!"

"You are so pig-headed! Every time anyone even tries to get close to you, you push them away!"

"Because every time anyone gets close to me… they end up dying!"

Lisbon collapsed onto her chair in defeat. He had hit home. He had no idea how right he was.

"Lisbon! Jane!" It was Grace. "Get out here! Greer just fainted!"

Lisbon and Jane looked at each other. They both looked scared. Lisbon felt instant dread. The girl wasn't meant to work herself up. They ran out of the office to find Greer sprawled out in a heap in front of Grace's desk.

"What happened?" Jane demanded as soon as he reached her. He knelt down beside her.

"She got all worked up over you two fighting. It made all of us nervous… but then she just went really white and fell to the floor."

"Call 911." Lisbon ordered, taking her place next to Jane.

"Why? She only passed out."

"Trust me on this." Lisbon said. Jane looked at her and a wash of realisation passed over his face. He knew she knew something he didn't.

"Lisbon… what's going on?"

**Please review.. I'd love to know what you think =] **


	15. Chapter 14

**A/N as promised.. updating earlier =]**

… **I may not have promised you guys officially, but I promised myself I would.**

**R&R =] x**

"_Call 911." Lisbon ordered, taking her place next to Jane._

"_Why? She only passed out."_

"_Trust me on this." Lisbon said. Jane looked at her and a wash of realisation passed over his face. He knew she knew something he didn't._

"_Lisbon… what's going on?"_

Lisbon moved in beside Greer, almost pushing Jane out of the way. She moved the girl into the recovery position, as Grace called 911. Lisbon checked Greer's pulse and sighed with relief when she found it strong.

"Lisbon.. what's going on?" Jane made a move to get closer to Greer again, but Lisbon held out a hand.

"Jane, I think it's best if you give her some air. Actually all of you back off a little." Lisbon addressed the small crowd of CBI agents that had gathered.

As the crowd started to thin a little, Jane seemed to be getting more and more frantic.

"Lisbon! What the hell is going on?"

"Jane, just wait for the ambulance to arrive." Lisbon said as she bent over Greer again, trying to wake her up.

"Greer? Greer, wake up." Lisbon patted the girl on the side of her face. She stirred a little but didn't regain consciousness. Whatever was going on inside her body, it didn't want her awake to feel it.

Lisbon sighed in relief as she heard the distant sound of sirens. Within minutes the elevator dinged and two paramedics rushed into the bullpen.

After a quick rundown of what happened, they checked her vitals and loaded her onto a stretcher. Jane got up and followed them out into the ambulance. Lisbon rushed after them. She followed them all the way to the hospital, the ambulance sirens clearing the road for both of them.

Lisbon had to circle the hospital in search of a park. By the time she had reached the front entrance, they had unloaded Greer and taken her to the ER to be checked out. After being pointed in the right direction by a nurse, Lisbon made her way to the right floor. She found Jane standing alone in a waiting room. He wasn't even sitting down. He seemed to be pacing.

"Jane."

Jane looked up to see Lisbon standing in the doorway.

"Lisbon… please…" he said, his voice cracking a little. It broke her heart to see him so stressed. "What's going on?"

"Jane… Patrick… you have no idea how much I want to tell you… but I promised. She wants to be the one to tell you."

Jane only sighed in frustration.

"Lisbon! Look around you! We're in a hospital! Greer's not exactly here to tell me is she? She hasn't even woken up yet." His voice broke on the last word and his face crinkled in pain. "Please."

This was killing her. But she had made a promise. She had kept it this long. He was going to find out soon. Greer would wake up soon and she would tell him… right?

"Patrick…I'm really sorry… I need to go and talk to a doctor…" Lisbon almost stammered. She started backing out of the door slowly, as if any quick movements would set him off.

Because she was walking backwards and couldn't see where she was going, she didn't notice the tall brunette walking into the waiting room, and bumped right into her.

"Oh, pardon me." Lisbon apologized turning around.

"That's quite alright." The lady replied.

Lisbon turned and all but ran away. She needed to alert one of the doctors of Greer's condition.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

As Lisbon left, Jane had sat down in defeat. He knew something horrible was happening to Greer, but no one would tell him what. Lisbon was betraying him. She was keeping something from him about his daughter, his child… and that was the worst type of betrayal. As he sat, all but drowning in his fury, a tall brown haired woman came into the waiting room.

He didn't even look up until the woman began to speak.

"Patrick Jane. You haven't changed a bit."

Jane looked up and instantly recognized the woman.

"Tracy…" he breathed.

"Hello Patrick."

"Why didn't you tell me? That I had a daughter."

Tracy walked over and sat by Jane. She was well groomed, from the last time he had seen her. Her hair was shorter now, and she was wearing a black business suit.

Tracy smirked, as if the answer was obvious.

"Because I didn't want my child getting involved with a fraud."

Jane almost laughed at this.

"And what would you call yourself? You were just as bad as I was."

"No, '_The Boy Wonder' _always _was_ the star of the show. Rumour has it you went back to the carnie life after I left. That was where you met Angela? Am I right?"

Jane winced at the sound of his wife's name.

"Yes, but you don't get to use that name." His eyes turned cold. "You betrayed me. You were my best friend. And you left me. With something that half belongs to me."

"I got a phone call from Greer last night" she said, changing the subject. "She begged that I come and get her. What _have_ you done to her?" she asked almost wickedly.

"I haven't _done _ anything to her Tracy." He sneered.

"Oh? Really? So the fact that we're sitting in a hospital waiting room is just my imagination? She was fine Patrick. She was getting everything she needed, and then she ran off one night. To find you… and you never sent her back." Tracy growled. Seemed as if the whole 'absence makes the heart grow fonder' thing doesn't occur here. Neither one of the waiting room inhabitants had noticed Lisbon standing in the doorway. "Now look what's happened. You've got her so worked up she's landed in a hospital. You're so stupid! Her bodies already under enough stress with the cancer spreading! and now, you've probably knocked off half of her life expectancy!"

Lisbon felt her breath intake. She watched the color drain from Jane's face. He looked ill. They still hadn't noticed her standing there.

"Excuse me." Jane stood up, placing one of his hands on his midsection. He turned towards the door and saw Lisbon standing there, looking like a deer in the headlights. He paused, catching her eye for a moment, before side-stepping passed her. He walked around the corner before he couldn't hold it in any longer. He felt as if he had been punched in the chest. He couldn't breathe. He was going to lose everything, all over again.

He slumped against the wall, sliding his back down the wall, before collapsing on the ground. He hugged his knees to his chest, feeling like a scared little boy. He felt his bottom lip tremble before one hot tear slid down his cheek.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Back in the waiting room, Tracy was looking questioningly at Lisbon. Lisbon seemed to be giving Tracy the death stare.

"What? What did I do?"

"He didn't know about the cancer." Lisbon was seething.

"Oh."

"Yeah. Oh."

Lisbon stood there for a couple of moments before she realised Jane would be in a distraught state right now. She gave Tracy one more dirty look before rushing out of the room in search of her friend.

She found him almost immediately, just around the corner from the waiting room. He was sitting on the floor, his knees drawn up to his chest, his arms hugging his knees and his head buried in his arms. His back was trembling, and she could hear the sobs escaping from his mouth.

Lisbon cautiously made her way over to him and sat down on the floor beside him. She sat there awkwardly for a few moments, she wasn't entirely sure what to do. All she wanted to do was to pull him into her arms and rock him.

_Concrete block, concrete block, concrete block…_

Instead she settled for placing her hand tentatively on his arm. He shrugged away, out of her grasp.

"Why are you here Lisbon?" he asked, his voice trembling a little. His words were slightly muffled as his face was still buried in his arms. Lisbon wasn't even surprised that he knew it was her straight away.

"Because you're my friend."

He snorted. He raised his face so he could look at her. Lisbon felt her heart drop when she saw the state he was truly in. His eyes were red rimmed, puffy and raw, his cheeks were tear stained. His hair was a complete mess and his nose was running slightly… it wasn't exactly an elegant sight. But Lisbon didn't find disgust in her mind, nor pity, she just wanted him to feel better. She just wanted to take all of the pain away.

"You call us friends… and yet you've kept this from me."

"Patrick… I swear to you… I wanted to tell you. This has been killing me! But I promised Greer. And I keep my promises."

Jane leant his head against the wall. He looked exhausted. He let out a long sigh.

"I understand that you're loyal Lisbon, and that she wanted to tell me herself… but… you should have told me. This has just taken it a little too far. She's _dying _Lisbon_._ Would it have really have been so bad to tell me? It would have been better hearing it from you than from Tracy. You say we're friends… friends don't keep things like this from each other."

Lisbon sat there, looking at him in desperation. He was making her out to be the bad guy. But what about the good things she's done? She had been there for Greer when he couldn't be.

"Jane… I wanted to tell you. It was by accident that I found out in the first place. I found her throwing up blood in the middle of the night. She had to give me an explanation, otherwise I was going to call 911. The night I found out was the night I drunk the scotch… I wasn't just bingeing for the sake of it…"

"She's my little girl, Lisbon. I may not have known her for long, but she's still my daughter… I'm losing my family all over again."

His face crumpled into a fresh set of tears. Seeing this Lisbon finally stopped resisting. She reached out, putting an arm around his shoulder and pulling him close. He started to struggle, trying to escape her hold.

"Lisbon, please… let go…"

Lisbon ignored him, and only tightened her hold. Jane struggled a little more until Lisbon brought one of her hands to the side of his head. She started stroking his hair, making shhh-ing sounds. At the touch to the side of his head, he started to calm a little. She really had hit home the other morning, finding his calming factor. She had a feeling she was going to need this a lot in the weeks to come.

He relaxed into her hold, resting his head against her shoulder. The tremors started to rack his body again. His sobs were still relatively silent, but she could hear his breathing hitch every couple of seconds. It was only moments before she realised she was crying too.

"Jane… I want you to know you can trust me." She felt him calm a little when she started to speak… he was recognising her words as his own.. he had told her this before. "No matter what happens I will be there for you… I will." She rubbed the side of his head again. She looked at him. His face was still pressed into her shoulder but from what she could see, he was listening. "I need you to know that."

At the last couple of words he shifted, wrapping his arms around her too. She held one hand to the back of his head, and started rubbing his back with the other. He buried his face into her shoulder again.

"Thank you Teresa." He choked out. "And I'm sorry… I should never have yelled at you."

"It's ok Patrick."

They sat there a little while longer, liking the comfort of the hug. After a moment longer, Lisbon decided that you can never have too much of a good thing, and broke away from his hold. She fished around in her pockets, looking for a tissue. She handed it to him.

"Clean yourself up Jane… we should go and see how Greer's doing."

He nodded, wiping his eyes and blowing his nose with a loud trumpeting affect. He smiled apologetically at her. Lisbon merely grinned.

Lisbon got to her feet, pulling Jane up with her. They turned around, back to the direction of the waiting room. They were still holding hands from Lisbon pulling Jane up… neither one were willing to let go. Jane was holding onto her hand as a life preserver… Lisbon on the other hand, didn't want to let go because she simply liked touching him.

They walked into the waiting room, to find Tracy still sitting there, her posture perfect in her practiced façade. Lisbon and Jane walked over to the opposite side of the waiting room, trying to get as much distance from Tracy as possible. She reminded Lisbon of the Evil Queen in Snow White. Lisbon wanted to spit on her. The thought proved to be rather entertaining because she couldn't help but smirk a little.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

About ten minutes later, a doctor came into the waiting room, carrying a clipboard.

"I take it you are all her for Greer Thomson?"

All three got to their feet simultaneously.

"I'll take that as a yes. Ok, Greer's blood pressure went through the roof. She got far too stressed out and this strained her breathing, causing her to faint― oxygen deprivation."

"Is she awake?" Jane asked before Tracy had even managed to get a word in.

"Yes. She's been fully conscious for about twenty minutes now."

"Can I see her?" Tracy asked, first to get in this time.

"Of course. Only one at a time though."

"I'll go." Tracy said, stepping past Jane and Lisbon.

Jane looked upset whereas Lisbon looked pure evil. After Tracy had left with the doctor, Lisbon lead Jane by the arm, back to the seat.

"Teresa… can I ask? What type of cancer does she have? How advanced is it? Please, tell me everything you know."

Lisbon sighed. She was wondering when the questions would start.

"She found out a few years back that she has lung cancer. She went through many operations, radiation and chemotherapies… everything. She's stopped responding to treatments. And it's starting to spread… they found a mass on her liver at her last check up."

Jane nodded, trying to compose himself more. He leant his head on her shoulder again, inhaling her cinnamon-y scent, this seemed to calm him a little. Lisbon was his savour, he realised. She got him a place at the CBI when she found out he was going after Red John, she was there for him when he got his memories back, when he went blind… and now, in another moment of need, here she was again… as faithful and as willing as ever.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Twenty minutes later, Tracy returned, telling Jane that Greer was asking for him. Jane patted Lisbon knee and left without a word, leaving Lisbon and Tracy in an awkward silence.

Jane reached Greer's room, and stood outside for a moment, just watching her. She was all hooked up to tubes. Her wig had been removed. Jane felt his heart lurch. He wasn't sure he could do this without Lisbon. It surprised him at how much he needed her. Greer saw him standing outside and grinned nervously.

_Well.. no going back now. _ He thought to himself. He pushed the door open and entered the room.

"Hey." He said quietly, taking a seat on the hard plastic chair beside her bed.

"Patrick. I'm so sorry." A silent tear trailed down her face.

"Hey, it's ok." He reached out and brushed the tear away with his thumb.

"I was going to tell you… I just… I couldn't find the courage. I had imagined meeting you so many times, so I didn't even think when I left. I had told my doctor back in Michigan, that I had found you and he had encouraged me to meet you. He said if I had enough strength in me to travel, then it would be a good idea." She looked down at her fingers. "I knew it would be hard on you, finding out you have a daughter and then moments later find out she's dying…" Jane flinched at the word. "and then I met you… and you were just so wonderful… and then I learnt of your family.. and I just didn't know how to tell you. I couldn't hurt you." She started playing with a frayed part of her blanket. "Teresa found out… I had worked myself up one night.. and she found me in the bathroom, having an episode.. so I had to tell her then. I made her promise not to tell you.. I had needed a few days of happiness with you."

Jane sat there listening intently. He was finally getting answers.. even if he didn't like what he was hearing.

"Anyway… that night, me and Teresa toasted to you… but she didn't stop at one.. I know she has a problem.. but I couldn't will myself to make her stop. She looked like she really needed it that night." Greer looked at Jane. "And then this morning… when I saw you two fighting… it was my fault. I see the way you look at each other. It's no secret that you have feelings for each other…" Jane gave her a funny look at this. "Well maybe it is… but only for the two of you… I had come here and I was messing everything up… I panicked. And had another episode I guess." 

Jane took one of her small, fragile hands in his.

"Greer… none of this is your fault. No matter what you think, you can't help what is happening. I'm glad you came. I'm glad I've had the opportunity to know you. Even if it is just for a little while, I wouldn't trade anything for our time together." He squeezed Greer's hand. She looked at him in wonder.

"I will never be able to figure you out." She said with a smile.

"Just look inside yourself." He said pointing to her heart.

Even though he was putting on a slight act for Greer, he felt terrible inside. His head hurt from crying so much and all he wanted to do was sleep. He was exhausted. He wanted to fall asleep in Lisbon's bed. No funny business, of course, but the thought of sleeping next to the only thing that made him feel safe, was rather inviting.

"Loving the new do" he said pointing at Greer's short hair.

"Really?"

"Really. You don't need to hide things from me anymore.. I'm going to be there for you, no matter what."

"Thanks…. dad…" she said trying out the word.

Jane felt a flurry of mixed emotions. He felt pride, and remorse and confusion. But through the haze of uncertainty, he couldn't help but smile.

"Dad… I like that." He said looking her in the eye.

She smiled at him. She felt as if a weight had been lifted off of her chest.

"No more secrets."

"No more secrets." He promised.

They sat there for a while, before the nurse came in and told him he needed to leave so Greer could get her rest. He left the room feeling totally drained. Hearing that Greer was dying has opened up old wounds. He couldn't help but massage his chest a little. It was only a matter of time before he had another funeral to go to. But this time, he had someone by his side.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

He walked into the waiting room to find Lisbon still sitting there, waiting for him. Tracy had long since disappeared in search of a caffeine fix.

"Lisbon."

She looked up from the book she was reading.

"Jane… are you ok?"

"As ok as I could be." He said quietly. The pain in his chest hadn't lessened like it usually did. He was finding it slightly difficult to breath. Lisbon, sensing his unease, got up and walked over to him, placing a hand on his chest. Immediately, the pain dulled a little. _Fascinating. _ He thought to himself.

"Come on Jane. Let's go home."

_Home? _He had stayed a few nights and already she was saying it was his home too? Or was that just because he had nowhere else to go? Would she make him sleep on the couch? He hoped to damn the she wouldn't.

He nodded once in response and she took his hand, leading him out of the waiting room. The small gesture took both of them by surprise, it had just come so easily.

They walked hand-in-hand out of the hospital front entrance, they both knew they would be using it a lot over the next few months.


	16. Chapter 15

**A/N Once again I'm so sorry for the delay! I'm predicting maybe another four-five chapters. **

**R&R =]**

It was just after five by the time they arrive home. After discarding their shoes and coats, they made their way into the kitchen where Lisbon started to make dinner.

"Macaroni cheese ok?" Lisbon asked as she started pulling out ingredients.

"Sure" he said. He was standing in the entrance of her kitchen, looking uncomfortable.

"Jane…" Lisbon said almost playfully, sensing his unease. "I don't bite."

"Right…" he said. This was Lisbon. Teresa.. his friend. Why should he feel uncomfortable around her? He put his practiced mask on… not quite so firmly as he usually would, and strolled into the kitchen.

"Can I help with anything?"

"Sure, you can chop that bacon up."

"Bacon?"

"Yeah.. it gives it that extra flavour." She smiled at him, a little embarrassed.

"Oh.. ok." He opened the packet of bacon and started chopping it into squares. Lisbon got to work, boiling water and pouring a packet of macaroni into the water. She started humming slightly. Cooking seemed to relax her. She looked over at Jane. He was half way through chopping the bacon, but he had put the knife down. He was leaning against the counter for support.

"Jane?" Lisbon asked walking over to him. His eyes were closed and he was swaying slightly.

"Just a little dizzy."

"Here.." she helped him into a chair. "Water?"

"Please.."

She turned and filled a glass from the fridge and placed it in front of him.

"What brought that on?"

"I don't know.. I just started seeing spots."

"Have you eaten today?"

"No…"

"Well there you go then."

She turned for the fridge, grabbing a can of lemonade and passing it to him.

He looked at it like it was poison.

"Drink." She ordered. "You sugar levels are probably low."

He made a face, but opened the can and took a sip anyway.

"Good." Lisbon said triumphantly. She turned and continued making the food.

"Do you want me to help?"

"No… you stay put. If you fall over in my kitchen, I'm responsible for you. And I don't need that responsibility on my shoulders." She smiled at him and he forced one back at her. He knew his blood pressure was high, he could feel the heat coursing through his veins. His heart rate was higher than usual and he couldn't control it. He had trained himself to be able to escalate his vitals, but never to slow them down if they were already up. He sighed, taking another sip of the lemonade. How did the tables turn so fast? One moment he's looking after Lisbon, and the next she has to look after him. He doesn't like feeling weak. But again, this was Lisbon. He knew she would do anything for him.

He really didn't deserve her as a friend. Here she was, loyal as ever. She was always trying to help him. She had hesitated signing him on to the team, but their friendship had grown quickly. He was always jeopardizing her job, she would be angry for a while, but the next day they would be fine again.

She finished making dinner, enjoying the company. When the macaroni was ready, she joined him at the breakfast bar. They ate in a comfortable silence. Jane sat there picking at his food. He was afraid if he started eating, his stomach would reject it.

"Jane, eat. You'll feel better if you do." She shoved a forkful into her mouth, almost as if she was trying to show him it wasn't poisoned.

He smirked at her and started eating properly. Sure enough, after he had eaten half of his plate, he was starting to feel his strength return, but he could still feel that dizzy pounding in his skull and his hands had started shaking. They finished their meal with idle chatter. Jane got up to do the dishes, ignoring Lisbon's protests. They compromised by doing them together, Jane washing, Lisbon drying. With the kitchen cleaned up, they sat down to watch a movie. Lisbon was using her best efforts to try and keep him distracted. She treated him to one of her favourites 'The Bodyguard.' They were sitting on the couch together, her curled up at one end, and him sitting with his legs crossed at the other. He seemed somewhat distracted through the movie, but Lisbon knew that was to be expected. He was fighting a battle with his own demons, not all of them old. They only made it an hour into the movie, before Lisbon noticed Jane's eyes starting to droop.

"Time for bed?" she asked.

He looked over at her, a little embarrassed.

"Yeah… I think so."

She got up, heading towards the stairs.

"Goodnight Jane." she said smiling at him.

Jane felt the panic build up inside of him. She was going to make him sleep on the couch. Alone. He couldn't bear the thought of having to face his nightmares alone tonight.

"Lisbon… I… I would understand if you thought it inappropriate… but… the couch… and you… and… I…"

"Jane? What is it? You can tell me." She said, seeing his struggle. She gave an encouraging smile.

He sighed, giving up.

"I don't want to be alone tonight."

Lisbon found her breath intake from surprise. She had not been expecting this one. She went through the options in her mind. She really couldn't see why it would be so bad. It's not like he would try anything… he just didn't want to be alone after finding out his daughter's dying of cancer… and besides, he had slept beside her one other time and everything had been ok.

"Sure Jane. Of course you can."

He smiled gratefully at her, before following her up the stairs.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

They changed into their pyjamas, him in the bathroom, her in the bedroom. She was already in the bed when he entered the bedroom. Walking over to the right hand side of the bed, he pulled back the covers and turned so he was facing her.

She noticed he was trembling and reached out and grabbed his hand.

He smiled softly at her, grateful for the company.

"Goodnight Jane."

"Goodnight Teresa."

She looked down, blushing slightly at the use of her Christian name. She knew he was exhausted. Today had been massive. Hell, the last week or so was just the cherry on top of the last eight years.

Tonight he might finally get some proper sleep.

When she looked up again, Jane's eyes were closed, his mouth slightly agape. Although most of his worry lines were smoothed down, his eyebrows were still furrowed into a frown.

Experimentally, with her free hand, she reached out and stroked his hair above his ear. The furrow of his brow relaxed, but his face didn't turn into the lazy grin she had seen earlier. She sighed, bringing her hand back from his head. She shifted, trying to get more comfortable.

Slowly she drifted off to sleep, her hand still intertwined with his.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

A couple of hours later, Lisbon woke again. She turned and looked at the clock. 10.30. She looked at Jane. He was still completely out to it. He hadn't moved since they had gone to bed, but he did have a light sheen of sweat glistening on his forehead. Her motherly instincts getting the best of her, she reached out, laying the back of her hand on his head. He was running a fever.

"Hmmm…" Lisbon said, pushing some of his damp curls to the side of his face. _Poor thing. _She thought to herself. _He really isn't handling this as well as he's letting on. _He had stressed himself into getting sick.

Lisbon sighed, running her hand through his hair again. Her phone lit up on the bedside table, humming slightly, as it vibrated against the wood.

Silently, so she didn't wake her sleeping companion, she grabbed her phone and stepped out of the room. She looked at the caller I.D.

Grace Van Pelt.

Slightly cursing to herself, she answered. The team had no idea what had happened since Greer had collapsed.

"Lisbon." She answered, as she made her way downstairs and into the lounge.

"Boss. How's Greer? We haven't heard anything."

"Grace? Is Rigsby and Cho there?" she asked.

"Um… yeah…" Van Pelt answered, clearly worried that Lisbon hadn't just given her a straight answer.

There was a shuffling and a soft click before the other members voices came on the phone.

"Boss?" It was Rigsby. "What's happening?"

Lisbon spent the next five minutes filling in the team on Greer's condition. She didn't mention about how Jane found out, nor did she tell them about finding him in the corridor. It would have breached his privacy and his confidence in her.

The team was silent. Cho was the first to break the silence.

"How long?" he asked, his mono-toned voice now a tone of compassion.

"Not long. Could be a few months… could be a week. They're re-evaluating her tomorrow. What happened today was just proof of how fast she is deteriorating."

Lisbon heard an intake of breath. Grace.

"Jane…?" it was all that needed to be asked.

"He's staying with me." She waited for a snide remark, but having not received one, she continued. "He's hurting, a lot. But that's to be expected. We're going to have to be there for him. He needs to know he's not alone in this world.

"Ok Boss." She knew they were in shock and that this was probably the best response she was going to get.

"I'll organise it with Wainwright that Jane gets some extended leave. Just remember we're a family. We stick together no matter what.

"Yes Boss."

"Guys, go home and get some rest, I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Ok, night boss." They all replied in sync.

Lisbon closed her phone, disconnecting the call.

She sighed before running a hand through her hair.

She ventured back upstairs, before climbing back into bed. Jane was curled up in a ball, facing away from her. She leaned over, reaching out to touch his forehead again. He was noticeably warmer than he had been ten minutes ago. Crap. He was burning up.

Lisbon sighed, knowing there wasn't anything she could do while he was asleep. Hopefully he would just sleep it off.

As a firm believer of Murphy, she silently wished she had never thought that. On cue, she heard a groan immerge from Jane's mouth.

"Jane?"

He responded by groaning again, followed by a soft "No!"

He rolled onto his back, shaking his head from side to side.

"I'm sorry! Stop! Please!"

"Jane! Jane… wake up!" she was gently shaking him by the shoulders, trying to rid him of his nightmare.

"PLEASE! DON'T!"

"PATRICK!"

His eyes flashed open. She was worried about how glazed they were.

He sat up, trying to slow his breathing. She sat up with him, rubbing soothing circles on his back. He was quite damp.

"It's ok Jane. You're alright. It was just a nightmare."

He let out an uneven, ragged breath in response.

He put his head in his hands. She could see he was in pain. Both physical and emotional.

"Patrick, I'll be right back, I'll go and get you some aspirin."

He nodded in response.

She raced downstairs, hunting through her medicine cabinet for the aspirin. She also found the thermometer so she grabbed that too. It was probably a good idea to monitor his temperature closely at the moment. She filled a glass of water from the fridge and headed back to the room. Jane was sitting up, hugging his knees. He had turned on the bedside light, now Lisbon could get a proper look at him. His blonde curls were sticking to his forehead, he was awfully pale and he was sweating badly. She could see that the shirt he was wearing, had indeed become quite damp.

"Drink this and take these." She instructed softly, handing over the water and the painkillers.

He obeyed, popping the tablets in his mouth and downing the water.

"Thanks." he said shakily.

"Jane, I'm just going to take your temperature. Ok?" she said, showing him the thermometer.

"Why?"

"Because you feel like you're burning up."

"How would you know?" he was completely serious. He wasn't even trying to make her feel uncomfortable- even though he was. He would have a field day if he knew she had been touching him in his sleep.

"Just put this in your mouth."

He complied by opening his mouth, allowing her to slip the device under his tongue. A minute or so later, the thermometer beeped.

"Moment of truth." She said out loud. "102.5…. Jane that's not good. What's going on with you, hmmm?" she sat down I front of him forcing him to look at her. He hesitated before answering.

"I feel awful. How much am I meant to be able to handle. It's all just too much."

Lisbon reached out and put a hand on his arm.

"I know Jane. I know. But we'll get through this. Together."

He looked up at her, with fever ridden eyes.

"I'm here for you Patrick… you do know that?"

He nodded.

"Patrick your temperature is too high. How would you feel about taking a cold shower before you go back to sleep?"

He nodded again and cleared his throat.

"Yeah… a shower would be good."

He pulled the blankets off and a shudder erupted through him. Goose-bumps appeared on the hollows of his cheeks. Lisbon didn't even know you could get goose-bumps on your face.

"Just make sure it's not a hot shower Jane. You'll only make yourself feel worse otherwise."

He nodded slyly, before grabbing a change of pale blue pyjamas from his bag on the floor. He walked rather unsteadily towards the en suite.

Lisbon waited until she heard the shower running before she crawled back into bed. She wasn't used to this quiet, broken side of Jane. He was usually so vivacious… larger than life. The thought of how much pain he's in, just made her want to sob.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Jane stayed in the shower for over half an hour. At first he listened to Lisbon, not allowing the temperature to reach any hotter than luke warm, but as the water hit his body, the chills that racked his body, became unbearable. He reached out, turning the shower nozzle onto hot. He stood there, letting the hot water run over his shivering body. He sighed in satisfaction. Soon the entire bathroom was covered in a soft layer of steam. God his head hurt. He was feeling dizzy and nauseated from the fever. Giving in, he sat down on the floor of the shower, letting the water flow over him. He leaned his head back against the wall, his vision flickering. Life sucks. He wasn't usually so pessimistic, but he could feel the dark and oppressing weight of his grief, cloud his vision and crushing his chest.

He shifted, his head protesting at the movement. Ok so maybe Lisbon was right. The heat was making him feel terrible. Although it was helping with the chills, he could feel himself getting more nauseated by the second. Reaching up to the shower nozzle, he turned it onto the coldest setting. Goosebumps erupted on his skin and he started shivering violently. He held his head under the freezing water until he couldn't handle it anymore.

Turning the nozzle off, he stood up and stepped out of the shower. He grabbed a fresh towel and dried himself quickly. His was shaking so intensely, that he was struggling to do the buttons up on his nightshirt. He finished dressing, an stepped out of the bathroom, his arms folded across his chest in an effort to warm himself up somewhat.

Lisbon was lying in the bed waiting for him. When he stepped out, she immediately sat up.

"You ok?" she asked in a tone of concern.

He padded nervously across the room, almost as if he was scared of invading her space again.

"Jane?" she asked again.

He shook his head in response. _No. He was not ok._

"I don't feel well at all." He sat down on the side of the bed and she moved to sit by him. She placed a hand on his back. He felt hot to the touch and the chills still racked his body.

"Jane, I'm gonna take your temperature again. Ok?"

He nodded. He looked as if he was seeing things that weren't there. His eyes kept searching, never once focusing on one thing for more than a second. Lisbon popped the device in his mouth and watched the numbers rise. He winced when the shrill beeping erupted through the room. Lisbon took the device out of his mouth. She sighed when she read the numbers.

103.5.

"Jane, I thought I told you to keep the water cold?"

He groaned slightly in response. There was a turmoil going on inside of him. His head was swimming and he was indeed seeing things. He could see Angela. She was sitting on Lisbon's chair in the corner of the room. She looked beautiful, but worry lines were carved into her flawless face. Jane knew he was hallucinating, but he couldn't take his eyes off of her.

"Jane!"

Lisbon's face came into his line of sight. He looked at her, thinking she looked beautiful too… but she was in the way! He couldn't see his wife anymore! He tried to look around Lisbon, but she grabbed his face in her hands.

"Patrick! Look at me!"

He did as he was told, looking at her with glassy eyes.

"Do I need to ring an ambulance?" she asked in a questioning, but soft tone.

His eyes widened in response. No! that wouldn't work, if he was admitted to hospital he wouldn't be allowed to see Greer. They would probably get a psych consult too, and he wasn't sure he had enough energy to pass. His mental ability was slowly diminishing as the fever took hold of his body. He knew it was only temporary, but he didn't like his mind being messed with.

He shook his head.

"No." he cracked. "No hospitals."

"Jane, you could be seriously ill."

"No hospitals."

"Fine, but if your fever reaches over 104, then I'm making the call."

He nodded at the threat. He could still refuse to go, the paramedics wouldn't be able to take him if he wasn't consenting.

"Well… what do you want me to do then?" Lisbon asked, slightly exasperated. She had no idea what to do with him. He was too stubborn to listen anyway.

"I don't want to feel the pain anymore. If you think you can do that.. then let me know."

Lisbon winced. She hated seeing her friend so tormented. She knew he felt like this all of time, or had the pain locked in some hidden corner of his brain, but he usually didn't show it on the outside.

Jane looked around Lisbon, the chair in the corner of the room now empty.

"Jane… come on, hop in the bed.

Lisbon moved over to her side of the bed and lay down. Jane swung his legs up so they were on the bed. Just as he was about to lie down, Lisbon didn't the unthinkable, she reached out and pulled him towards her, his head landing on her chest. She wrapped her arms around him, taking advantage of his surprised state. He cautiously draped his arm over her middle, snuggling into her. She raised one of her hands and started stroking the side of his head, along his temple. He sighed in relief, her touch somewhat helping his pounding head.

Only a few moments later, she felt him relax against her, his breathing regulating.

God he was warm. It was a good thing she loved the heat, she usually got cold at night. He seemed to be acting as her human hot water bottle; even if the reason he was so warm was because he was running a high fever. She just hoped her body heat wouldn't escalate it.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Lisbon woke the next morning to find a small weight pressing into her chest. Jane.

She remembered the night before and immediately placed her hand on his forehead. He felt warm, but no longer felt like he was running a high fever. Her touch must have woken him because she felt him stir against her. He moved up, so his head was on his pillow and looked at her. He looked nervous.

"How are you feeling?" Lisbon asked.

"Yeah… better than last night." He shifted, so he could get a little closer to her again. "Lisbon… about last night… I'm sorry."

"What for? Everyone gets sick Jane."

"Yeah… I know… but not everyone tells their friend to take their pain away."

"Jane… don't…"

"And not every friend would have actually managed to do that. I haven't slept that well since my wife died. It's the first time in eight years that I went without that pain. I think it was listening to your heartbeat. It calmed me…. What… what I'm really trying to say… is thanks."

"Anytime Jane."

She reached over to the bedside table, grabbing the thermometer.

"May I?" she asked. He nodded and she popped it in his mouth, waiting for the beep. "100.7. That's heaps better, but still a little high."

She put the device back on the table and looked at the clock.

"Jane, its 9.00! I forgot to set my alarm last night!"

"Lisbon, calm down…. I ah… I asked Wainwright for the day off… I was hoping you would come to the hospital with me… for when we find out Greer's updated results?"

Lisbon sighed. Her momentary thought of being late had made her stomach drop.

"Of course Jane."

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

They arrived at the hospital, just after eleven. Lisbon had forced some toast into the still slightly shaky Jane, but he hadn't kicked up much of a fuss, knowing she was only trying to help him.

They made their way up to the oncology ward, to visit Greer. Tracy had gone to the cafeteria to grab some lunch, leaving the three of them free to chat. Greer had already been through her various tests, but she said that she was used to them. "Routines" she called them.

"You look pale." Greer said, directing her gaze to Jane. "You ok?"

He smiled at Greer.

"You're the one in a hospital bed, and you're asking me if I'm ok?"

She nodded.

He chuckled slightly.

"I wasn't well last night, but Teresa was a saint." He said, both he and Greer smiling at his pun. Lisbon just shook her head at the pair. Obviously the best thing for both of them was to be together. They made each other happy and at peace.

"Well… you need to look after yourself."

"I know Greer. I've already had this lecture from Lisbon."

"What… no you haven't!"

"Ahh.. but you see, my dear Lisbon, I could see it in your eyes."

Lisbon stuck her tongue out and the three of them erupted into laughter. Their laughter was cut short when the doctor entered the room, followed shortly by Tracy.

Greer, Jane and Lisbon, all looked like deer's in the headlights. It was the moment of truth. The doctor was holding a large, flat paper bag, containing her films.

"You have my results?" Greer asked.

"I do." The doctor replied.

Jane was watching him. He could see it in his eyes that it was bad news.

"The cancer has spread to your brain." He held up one of the films to the light, showing her brain. He pointed to a white mass."

"That's the tumour?" Greer asked, tears starting to well up in her eyes.

"I'm afraid so. I'm very sorry." The doctor said, putting the film back in its cover. Jane could see he was genuinely sad. Although the doctor was young, he had endured more sadness than anyone should. He had seen too much death for one man.

"How long?" Jane asked in an impatient tone.

"Three weeks… maybe less."

Lisbon felt her heart sink. She looked sideways, with eyes only for Jane.

He looked soulless. She wasn't sure he was going to come back completely from this one.

Tracy interrupted the silence.

"Are you sure?"

The doctor nodded.

"I'm sorry."

Jane got up and strode out of the room.

Lisbon ran after him, after giving Greer's hand a small squeeze.

She rounded the corner just in time to see Jane punch a hole in the wall.

She had never seen this physical, angry side of Jane before. She knew it must have been there, the monster buried deep, but she never thought she would ever see it.

Tentatively, so she didn't startle him, she walked up to him.

"Jane?" she whispered softly.

He spun around to look at her.

"Lisbon." He said it as an accusation.

"Are you ok?"

"Am I ok? _Am I ok?_ Do you bloody well _think_ I'm ok?"

"I'm sorry Jane…" she placed a hand on his shoulder.

He shrugged away from her grip.

"Get off!"

"Jane?"

"Look would you just go away. I've been dealing with things on my own for longer then you've cared. I didn't need you then, and I don't need you now!"

Lisbon felt her heart crack.

"Ok…" she whispered. "I'll just leave you alone then." She turned and walked away from him, letting the tears that had been threatening spill free.

She walked through those two front doors, before her façade crumpled completely.

**A/N Please review! If you have any idea on how you want this to end.. please let me know.. =]**


	17. Chapter 16

**A/N so sorry about the late update (again =\) I've had a bit of a writer's block. Owel, hope you guys enjoy this chappie all the same =]**

**WARNING: some of the language gets a little nasty.. **

**R&R =]**

(Lisbon's POV)

Jane didn't come home that night. Lisbon had left the door unlocked, just in case he had decided to show up. What he had said to her had hurt. A lot. She had been there for him through all of this. She was the only one who had been able to calm him down, or make him feel better. She had let him sleep on her chest, wrapped up in her arms… and then he had just thrown it all back at her. But she also knew that this wasn't really him.

She was lying in bed, the clock telling her it was already past midnight. But she kept waiting for him.

She drifted off to sleep at about three. Her alarm woke her just before 7. She patted the empty spot on her bed and sighed. She showered and dressed before she made her way downstairs. A sinking feeling presented itself in her chest when she saw that the couch was vacant also.

She grabbed a coffee on her way out the door, not bothering with breakfast. The absence of her consultant and friend, had done its job to dissipate her appetite.

As always, she arrived at work before any other member of her team. She made her way into her office, sighing as she saw the large stack of paperwork waiting for her.

She settled in, know she could get at least half an hour of uninterrupted work done, before the rest of her team arrived for the day. It saddened her to think about why she had so much paperwork. Usually she would come in on weekends to try to catch up, and she had also had yesterday off.

She wondered what Jane was doing. Was he ok? She should be angry with him, furious even. But she just couldn't find it in her heart to be mad. He was grieving. The inevitable death of his newly found daughter was driving him over the edge. She wanted to call him, but she knew she should give him some space. Wait for him to come to her.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Three days had passed and Lisbon still hadn't heard from Jane. She was starting to go crazy, and it wasn't going unnoticed. The team was starting to worry about her frequently checking her phone. She was leaving earlier than usual, rushing home to see if he had come back. Every time she arrived home and he wasn't there, she could feel her heart sink. Something had to be done. There was no way in hell she was going to let him go through this alone. She wasn't going to let him shut her out this easy.

She walked into the kitchen, chucking last night's leftovers into the microwave. While her meal was cooking, she gave in, deciding to call Jane. She dialled his number, hesitating before pressing the call button. This was going against everything she had told herself the last four days, but she needed to know that he was ok. She listened to the dial tone for a moment, before she was cut out to voicemail.

She slammed her phone down on the countertop. Either he was ignoring her or… or what? It was only 6:00 at night.. so it wasn't like he was asleep. She needed to see him! but she had no idea where he was and he wasn't answering his phone. Maybe he was at the hospital?

Lisbon grabbed her keys and phone off of the counter and headed out the door. She grabbed her jacket on her way out, her dinner long forgotten.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

"Hey kiddo."

"Teresa!"

Lisbon walked into Greer's room to find it Janeless. There was no sign of her friend. Greer was sitting up in the bed, reading a book. There was an IV hooked into her arm, leading up to various tubes. She had completely discarded her wig, not needing to pretend anymore.

"How are you feeling?" she asked Greer.

"Yeah alright.. the pain meds they've got me on are pretty wicked." They shared a smile.

"Sorry I haven't been to see you earlier Greer… I don't really have an excuse."

"It's ok. Dad's been here heaps, keeping me company.. and so has mum."

"Dad ae?"

Greer blushed.

"Yeah… I thought I may as well start calling him dad, it's what he is, no point trying to deny it." she smiled sheepishly.

"Well that will be nice, for the both of you."

Greer nodded.

"Teresa? Is he ok?"

Lisbon moved in and sat on the chair beside Greer's bed.

"Greer, I haven't spoken to your father since we found out about your prognosis. We… we had an argument.. and I haven't heard from him since."

"Oh…" Greer muttered. "I guess I should have guessed that one.. he's seemed… off lately. He hasn't looked well, at all. And he mentioned he wasn't staying with you… I should have made the connection earlier. I guess my super powers are diminishing."

"Don't say that Greer." Lisbon looked sadly at her hands.

"Teresa… it's ok… I came to terms with death a long time ago… I'm not afraid to die…. I just afraid of what will happen when I'm gone. It's all out of our control."

Lisbon sighed.

"Yeah I guess it is."

"Teresa.. everything will work out in the end.. it has to be ok."

Lisbon looked up into the desperate girls face.

"As long as I'm around Greer, things will work out."

Greer nodded.

"Thanks Teresa. For everything. You've been a great friend through this."

Lisbon smiled back at her. It was weird to think of a seventeen year old as a friend.. but that's exactly what she was. Through these horrible events.. they had indeed become close. The sat in silence for a little bit.

"Wait.. super powers?"

Greer laughed.

"The team dropped by yesterday. Rigsby and Cho call the whole perception thing super powers."

"Ha… right. Yeah I think I've heard that one before… they've used it on Jane a few times."

The sound of his name made Lisbon heart hurt. She paused, looking sadly out the window, where it was just beginning to rain.

"Teresa?"

"Do you know where he is?"

Greer gave Lisbon a puzzled look.

"You really weren't kidding when you said you hadn't heard from him all week, were you?"

Lisbon shook her head sadly.

"Is there anything you can remember? I need to find him." Lisbon muttered.

Greer paused, thinking for a moment.

"Oh… he said something about his playboy mansion?"

"He's in Malibu?"

Greer looked at Lisbon, confused.

"It's the house where he and his family used to live… that's where they were murdered."

Confusion turned to horror.

"Why would he go back there?"

"I'm not sure… Greer, I have to go to him."

"Of course Teresa…"

"I promise I'll come back and see you soon." She leant in, giving the small girl a hug. "Take care of yourself."

Greer rolled her eyes.

"Hey, I have people being paid to do that for me."

Lisbon chuckled.

"You take care too Teresa… and take care of him."

"I will."

Lisbon turned to leave. She was halfway out the door when Greer spoke again.

"Don't be too hard on him… I know he's missed you."

"But you said…"

"Go Teresa… you have a long drive."

"Right… see ya soon."

"Bye."

Greer smiled at Lisbon's departing back. She had seen that crazed look in her eye so many times. She would do anything to protect him. At least she knew he would be in good hands, once she was gone. She only hoped he wasn't too stubborn to accept the help.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

The rain was incredible. It hit her windscreen like bullets, her wipers only clearing her view for a microsecond. Lisbon had been driving for nearly three hours before she realised she was low on gas. She pulled over into the next station, deciding she should probably eat something as well. She had been skipping a lot of meals recently without even realising it, and it wasn't doing her energy levels any favours, especially seeing as she still had to drive for about another three and a half hours.

She stifled a yawn as she went inside to pay for the gas and grab some food. She settled on a pie and a bear claw, also grabbing a coffee. Caffeine would be amazing at the moment.

She dashed out to her car, trying her best not to get soaked in the process. A crack of thunder resounded in the distance, making her jump.

She jumped into her car, throwing her food on the passenger seat and the coffee into the cup holder. She somewhat shook herself, to rid her hair of the raindrops that had gotten caught.

She turned back onto the road, grabbing the pie and taking a massive bite out of him. She groaned in satisfaction. It had been a long time since she had had a pie this good.

In a matter of moments she had completely demolished both pie and bear claw and was in the process of sculling her coffee.

She focused on the road, putting everything into not crashing into oncoming traffic, she could barely see where she was going from the rain.

She had only been to Jane's Malibu mansion a couple of times, none of the visits ever being very pleasant.

She had no idea what she was going to say to Jane when she got there. What if he really didn't want to see her? What if he kicked her out? Even worse.. what if he wanted her to stay? She had come to feel so many different things for Patrick Jane, and it scared the crap out of her. She didn't know what to do with them. Every time she saw him, she felt as if the world had stopped, that they were captivated in that moment in time forever… or if they weren't, she wanted to be.

The part that seemed to scare her the most, is the fact that she though he may feel the same way. She had seen the way he looked at her, the twinkle in his eyes would always shine just that little bit brighter when he watched her. He made her nervous.

She suddenly felt nauseous, the food disagreeing with her thoughts. She cracked her window, trying to get a little fresh air.

She was so confused.

What the hell was she doing? Here she was driving nearly seven hours on a Friday night, to a man who probably couldn't bear the sight of her. Who was she kidding.. of course he didn't feel the same way. Look at what he had said to her when she had tried to help him. She was only ever trying to help him… sometimes she wondered if it was worth it… loving a man who could never love her the same way.

She slammed on her breaks, lucky that there was no one behind her. She loved him. Well… of course she loved him… but she was _in_ love with him? That was why she was finding it so hard to be away from him, why it had hurt so much when he had yelled at her.

How had she been so naive? She was in love with him. It was so obvious to her now.

"I'm in love with Patrick Jane!" she yelled to herself.

She had to get to him. She put her car back in drive and started racing down the road, in the hopes he didn't despise the very sight of her.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

(Jane's POV)

"That was the last one. All gone!" his voice came out a lot husker than intended. He cleared his throat, attempting to place the bottle in line with the others. His hands shook, and his head spun, making what should have been an easy task, damn near impossible. The placed the bottle on the floor carefully, before retracting his hand. His movements were jittery and his hand caught the top of another bottle, sending it crashing down on the other bottles, falling like dominoes. They clinked to the floor, and all ten bottles rolled around the room.

"ARGH!" he growled. "Fuck'n stupid bottles! Fuck'n stupid room! FUCK'N STUPID LIFE!"

He got up, momentarily losing his balance and falling back against the wall. He stumbled forward and picked up the closest bottle, chucking it with all his force against the wall. It smashed, littering the room with shards of glass.

"Why the fuck would you do this to me?" he threw another bottle. He wanted to scream… so he did just that.

"Why is it…" he threw a bottle. "that I get another chance to be happy," threw another. "And then she has fuck'n cancer!" he turned around, throwing another bottle, this time aiming at the red smiley face on the wall. The glass burst into a million pieces. Some of the remaining liquid from the bottle, splattered all over the face. It made it look like the face was crying. He collapsed onto his hands and knees, the glass cutting into his palms. He hung his head and started to sob, each cry coming out louder than the last.

"Why?" he cried out.

Soon he was howling, unable to control his desperate pleas to a god he didn't believe in.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

(Lisbon's POV)

By the time Lisbon made it up Jane's driveway, it was past midnight. The rain hadn't eased at all, if anything, it had gotten heavier. She got out of the car and dashed up the stairs to the entrance. She stood for a moment, not knowing what to do next. Deciding she couldn't just barge into his house, she knocked on the door.

No answer.

She tried again.

After a few moments she realised that if he was in there, he wouldn't be able to hear the knock over the rain. Maybe she should just leave and find a motel. But then again, she had driven all this way to find him, and she didn't want to back down now. Making up her mind, she gently pushed on the door, and was somewhat relieved when it opened for her. Well, it was a sign that she was meant to be there.

She crept in, quietly closing the door behind her. Deciding Jane probably wouldn't thank her for dragging mud and water through his house, she took off her boots, and placed them by the door.

The house was quiet. The only sound she could hear was the rain. It echoed throughout the house, giving off an eerie feeling. She really hated being here. This place reminded her of death. It reminded her of why Jane was so broken. But then again, it reminded her of the reason she was here to begin with. This man needed help, and she was the one who was meant to give it to him.

She made her way towards the stairs, knowing that if he was going to be here, then there was only one room he would be in. She climbed the stairs slowly. She felt like a victim in a horror movie, the one where you're yelling at the character not to go in the room, but she still does… well, let's just say she wasn't looking forward to what she was about to find. But then again.. maybe he was fine. He might not even be here. He could be in a hotel somewhere… or if he was here he could be asleep somewhere. But she knew, once again, she was just being naive.

She reached the top of the staircase and edged towards the bedroom. The door was cracked open, but otherwise closed. She reached the door, but hesitated before entering. She took a deep breath and took a leap of faith, swinging open the door all the way.

The first thing she noticed was the face. The murderous face smiling back at her. She felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up, as the chills ran down her spine. The second thing she noticed, was the man crouched in front of the face, as if he were praying to it.

She felt instantly sick. He was worshipping the face? It was then she noticed the glass scattered around the room, and the lone bottles that had rolled into different corners.

"Jane?" she whispered.

She saw his body tense, as he realised he was no longer alone. He slowly sat up, stiffly turning towards her.

"Lisbon." It was an accusation again. "What are you doing here?"

He was angry, she could see that, but she had no intention of letting that offend her.

"I came to make sure you were ok." She stayed where she was, thinking it was a bad idea to make a move towards him.

"Ha." He scoffed. "Of course you did. Or maybe you just wanted to see the broken self loathing Patrick Jane. You wanted to see the real me… well here I am."

"Jane… I…"

"Because we all know the great Teresa Lisbon doesn't have any baggage…" Jane cut her off. "does she. Your just a perfect little flower aren't you."

"Hey… that's not…"

"It's ok my pet… no one is going to know that Special Agent Teresa Lisbon was beaten as a child? that she has daddy issues."

"You're an arsehole."

"Ha! You see, my dear, you're finally beginning to see the light. So maybe you should just piss off."

"I'm not going anywhere." Lisbon said, planting her feet

Jane growled.

"Get. OUT!"

"No."

Lisbon swore she saw Jane's eyes flash red.

He got up, drunkenly advancing towards her.

"Get the hell out of my house!"

He pulled back his arm, as if he was about to punch her, but his fist landed on the wall with a loud crash, denting it painfully. Lisbon jumped as his knuckles came into contact with the plaster. She thought she heard one of his bones break. He let out a moan of satisfied pain before collapsing to the floor again.

This was the second time in a week that Lisbon had seen Jane act out violently, and she didn't like it.

Tentatively, she closed the distance between them, placing a hand on his shoulder, and kneeling down to the same level as him.

"Why won't you just leave me alone?" he asked in a gruff voice.

"Because I care about you Jane."

He let out a slow, steadying breath.

"I'm worried about you."

"You're _worried_ about me. Why would you be worried about _me_?" he paused theatrically. "Oh… that's right.. coz I'm a nutcase who's falling apart. Coz my seventeen year old daughter is dying. Everyone I ever care about dies. They all just fucking die. And you're _worried _about me. Well whip-de! Aren't you a saint." He shrugged away from her, making her loose her balance and fall to the floor with a loud bang. She let out a small cry of pain, when she landed on her tailbone.

_That's gonna leave a bruise._

"Lisbon? I'm… I'm sorry… are you ok?" she heard that the tone in his voice had changed, he spoke a lot softer this time.

"I'm fine." She got up painfully.

"Maybe you should just go. I want to be alone."

"Jane, I'm not going anywhere."

"Argh! Woman! Why do you have to be so damn stubborn all the time!"

"I'm not leaving."

She heard a low growl coming from Jane's throat.

"Fine. Do what you want."

"Fine. I will."

"If you're staying…" he said darkly, "then why don't you do something useful."

Before she could even register what was going on, Jane's lips were crushing down on hers. He tasted like alcohol, and anger, and overall Janeness. His lips were rough against hers and his chin scratched her face because he hadn't shaved in days. Although every part of her soul wanted to give in to this kiss, she knew it was wrong. He made her so angry! Why couldn't their first kiss have been under better circumstances? She felt all the rage and grief he had caused her over the time she knew him, boil up to breaking point.

She pulled away from Jane and slapped him.

"Screw you. I was only trying to help you."

She looked at him darkly, before she turned on her heel and left. She was half way down the stairs before she heard a thud- the sound of a human body hitting the floor.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

(Jane's POV)

_She was only trying to help. She was only trying to help. She was only trying to help. You wanker! _

_Here she was, trying to be a good friend, trying to save you, and you just shove it right back in her face. And now you're alone again. Sitting in your miserable little house, in your miserable little room, in your miserable little life. Well, you got what you wanted. You wanted to be alone. Now you are. And she's never coming back. _

He heard the floorboard creek behind him. Two strong arms wrapped around his torso, hugging him from behind.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

She never really had any intention of leaving. Now he knew she was here, the initial reacting would wear off. He just needed some time to calm down, and from the way she exited the room, she presumed he was stewing in self pity.

She waited ten minutes before re-ascending the stairs. The bedroom door was open and she could see him slumped on crouched knees, his head hung low and his shoulders shaking. He had his back to the door, so he couldn't see her returning.

She made her way across the bedroom floor, a floorboard creaking just before she reached him. She knelt down behind him, wrapping her arms around his middle, hugging him tight, she felt him relax against her, his arms coming up to hold hers.

He pulled her around so he could face her.

"Oh, Teresa.. I'm so sorry… I'm so sorry."

"Patrick… shhh.. it's ok."

He wasn't crying, he was well beyond crying. He pulled her into a hug, holding her tightly. They broke apart after a moment, looking into each other's eyes.

They sat there gazing at each other, drinking in every detail, as if they were long lost lovers that had found each other. In some retrospect.. they were.

Jane reached out, cupping her face and started leaning towards her.

Lisbon's heart starting beating at a mile a minute. He was going to kiss her… properly. She felt herself be succumbed by his spell, closing her eyes, and leaning in, breaking the distance between them.

Lisbon felt electricity spark through her lips. This was one of those Hollywood kisses, one's you only heard about in fairytales. She had never dreamed a kiss could get this amazing.

After a short time they broke apart, both just wanting to keep things sweet and simple.

He smiled for the first time in days.

"Wow…"

"Yeah… wow…"

She looked up into his eyes, the twinkle had reappeared.

She had kissed Patrick Jane! Her insides started whirring and her head started spinning. She sighed in delight. This was better. At least she had her Jane back now.

The worst wasn't over, but at least there was now a small light at the end of the tunnel.


	18. Chapter 17

**A/N so sorry about the late update! But I promise I'll get the next one up sooner. Because of the holidays I'll actually be able to find the time.**

**Hope you enjoy =]**

_She had kissed Patrick Jane! Her insides started whirring and her head started spinning. She sighed in delight. This was better. At least she had her Jane back now._

She stood up, gently pulling him up with her.

"Jane? Are you ok?" she asked, noticing him sway a little.

"Can't say I've eaten a whole lot lately.. and those bottles of… whatever… have gone straight to my head." He verified his thoughts by falling forward, causing Lisbon to have to catch him. She grunted under his weight.

"Come on Jane, let's get you to a motel."

He nodded into her shoulder and mumbled something incoherent.

"What was that Jane?"

"Thank you for saving me Lisbon."

Lisbon felt a rush of pride course through her body.

"Always."

She wrapped her arms momentarily around him. He responded by wrapping his own arms around her.

"Come on Jane. Let's go. Do you have an overnight bag anywhere?"

He nodded, pointing over to a bag in the corner that she hadn't noticed earlier. She slung the overnight bag over her shoulder, pulled his uninjured hand around her neck, and wrapped her other arm around his back. Getting down the stairs in one piece was going to be hell.

Jane cradled his right hand to his chest, the pain was obviously starting to cause him some grief.

They made it to the staircase and nervously looked down. Lisbon, sensing Jane's discomfort, rubbed his back slightly.

"One step at a time."

He nodded feebly, starting to feel a little sorry for himself. His hand hurt, his head was spinning and his stomach was starting to turn. Now he remembered why he hated drinking so much.

They made it halfway down the stairs when Lisbon noticed Jane starting to drag a little.

"Jane? You ok?"

She turned to look at his face, noticing how pale he had become.

"How did you use to do this every night Lisbon?"

Lisbon winced when she realized he was talking about her drinking problem.

"I take it you're not feeling too flash right now?"

He didn't answer, just shook his head. If he talked, he might throw up all over the floor.

"Lightweight." She smirked at him.

Jane pouted. She was making fun of him.

"I'm only joking," She laughed. "and look, we're at the bottom of the staircase."

Lisbon saw relief spark through Jane's eyes. She lead him to the door and leant him against the wall while she put her boots back on. She could hear the rain outside and sighed. She had only just dried off, and at the pace they had to go because of Jane's condition, they were about to get soaked.

"Jane, give me your keys."

He fished around in his pockets with his left hand and handed them to her. She pulled his left arm over her shoulder again and guided him out the door. The storm hadn't settled at all. The rain still pounded, hitting the ground like mini torpedoes. They walked onto the veranda and she turned and locked the door.

She looked at Jane and was shocked to see a mixture of discomfort and fear splayed on his face.

"Jane?"

She could tell he was losing the battle he was having with his stomach.

"Jane… please.. if you need to throw up, I'd prefer you did it now, rather than in my car."

He leant against the veranda, closing his eyes, his hand coming down to clutch his stomach. A few minutes later, Jane's face scrunched in pain. He ran down the steps, into the rain, and disappeared into the bushes. Lisbon had never seen Jane move so fast! Over the deafening sound of the rain, she could hear gagging coming from the bushes Jane had just vanished into.

She sighed, she was going to have to get rained on. She ran down the stairs and into the bushes. She found Jane, bent over, leaning against a tree trunk bringing up whatever he had eaten (or drank) the last day. She paced over to him, placing a comforting hand on his back, and starting rubbing small circles. She felt his entire body clench as another spasm racked through his body.

After a few minutes, Lisbon was starting to worry. He still hadn't stopped vomiting.. well, he had started dry heaving, but with each spasm he was getting weaker and weaker. It had gotten to the point that Lisbon had to help hold him up.

He coughed a couple of times and was still. His breathing was coming out really fast, as if he hadn't managed to get a single breath in since he started being sick. Lisbon, who was still rubbing circles on the small of his back came round to face him. She knelt to the side of him, careful not to be in range if he started up again.

"Are you finished?" she asked gently. This whole night had scared the shit out of her.

He nodded weakly in response.

"Can you move?"

He straightened up a little, only to be met with black spots flying around his vision. Lisbon grabbed him around the waste, careful not to hurt his already pained stomach. She was beginning to think this was worse than just a reaction to the alcohol.

Jane blinked a few times, trying to clear his vision. He looked at Lisbon, as if this was his first time he had even looked at her. He was seeing her, like really seeing her, and it seemed he liked what he saw. She was absolutely drenched, her long raven hair plastered to her face. She was staring up at him with her big green eyes, that were filled with concern. Concern for him.

It was then his heart melted. He loved her. A part of him had always known this, but he had never had the guts to say it out loud. He wanted to tell her, but he figured there would be a better, less wet opportunity. Maybe when he was feeling better.

He felt a cold hand on his forehead.

"You're really warm Jane…" He still had a fever. Lisbon pulled back her hand in disbelief. "Jane please tell me you haven't had a fever since Monday night!"

He only shrugged his shoulders. He knew very well that the fever had never gone down completely, if anything it had re-escalated the last couple of days.

"Shit Jane… you need to take better care of yourself. My guess is you were already feeling sick before you decided to down ten bottles of whatever."

He shrugged sheepishly at her.

She growled slightly in the back of her throat. This only made Jane smile.

She sighed.

"Do you think you're going to vomit again?"

He cleared his throat.

"I think I'll be ok…" he cracked. "For now." he added.

"Come on then. Let's go find somewhere to stay.. and dry off."

She supported him again and slowly they made their way to the car. She unlocked the passenger side and eased Jane into the seat. He buckled himself in and leant back, closing his eyes. She flung his bag in the back with hers, hopefully his things didn't get too wet...

Lisbon somewhat jogged over to the driver's side, looking forward to turning the heat onto full blast. She shook herself off a little after closing the door. She was starting to shiver.

Once she had herself situated- belt buckled and heater on, she turned to face Jane.

His injured hand was still cradled to his chest and his other arm was wrapped around his mid-section. While his eyes were closed, his face was scrunched in pain.

Lisbon sighed again, it seemed as if she had been doing a lot of that lately. His hand and his stomach were really bothering him. Best she get them both to a motel fast.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Lisbon pulled up to a nearby motel and left a sleeping Jane in the car as she went to check in. She asked for a room on ground level, seeing as she had enough trouble getting Jane _down _the stairs. She thanked the lady and made her way through the rain, back to her car. She parked in front of _Room 10_, grabbed their bags and made her way to the door to unlock it. She opened the door and stepped inside, taking a brief look around― double bed, bathroom, kitchen unit. She nodded in approval, dumped the bags in the kitchen and dashed back through the rain to her sleeping companion.

She opened the passenger door and lightly shook him awake. He opened his eyes and gave her a pitiful look.

"Great, so now as well as being hungover, injured and sick, you also have man-flu?"

Jane scoffed at her.

"Man-flu is serious Lisbon… I could end up in intensive care with man-flu… you shouldn't joke about such things."

Lisbon giggled at his serious face, but his eyes were twinkling so she knew he was just playing with her. Trying to lighten the situation perhaps?

"Come on you hypochondriac, let's get you inside." She knew very well he wasn't being a hypochondriac and he really did feel as ill as he was letting on, but she still felt like she needed to tell herself he was ok.

She reached over and helped him unbuckle his belt. She reached into her glove box and pulled out a first aid kit, before helping him out of the car. She led him through the rain and into the room, after locking her car.

"If you need to sit down, sit on the couch, I'd prefer you get that wet than the bed."

He nodded and she led him to the couch. After she had him sitting, she turned and locked the room door and flicked on the radiator. A massive chill ripped through her body as she realized how cold she really was.

"Right, now let's take a look at that hand."

She made her way back to Jane, who was in the same position he had been in the car, injured hand to chest, other hand to torso. She sat on the coffee table so she was facing him, and reached out to take his right hand in hers.

There was bruising along his knuckle line and small cuts that were beginning to scab. His middle knuckle was dislocated.

_Great…_

At least nothing was broken.

"You're knuckle is dislocated. I'm going to have to reset it."

She looked into his face, his eyes were round with fear.

"Jane this will hurt, but if I don't do it now, it will only get worse."

He nodded and looked away, biting his lip, readying himself for the oncoming pain.

Gently, she ran her fingers over the knuckle, finding out the extent of the damage. The joint had stiffened from time, meaning it wasn't going to slide into place as easily as she'd hoped.

She took a firm, but gentle grasp on his middle finger. She felt Jane tense, but ignored him. In one swift motion, she pulled, slid and pushed, realigning his joint with a soft _pop_.

Jane exhaled the breath he had been holding, and pulled his hand back to his chest.

"Thanks."

Lisbon could still hear the pain in his voice.

"I'll have to splint those." she said, digging in her first aid kit for the strapping tape.

Jane held out his hand again for her, not looking entirely impressed.

She strapped his middle finger and his forefinger together, trying to be extra gentle as he had started shaking. She wasn't sure if it was from the cold or the pain.

"Right.. we need to get out of these wet clothes. Do you want first shower? Or will I?"

"You go." He cracked out. "It's only fair."

Lisbon took one look at him and shook her head. His teeth had started chattering, which wasn't exactly going to help his fever. As his body was trying to warm up the outside, the temperature on the inside would manage to rise even further. He needed a shower, and fast… before the fever could do any real damage.

"No Jane, maybe you should go first."

Jane mirrored her earlier movements by shaking his own head.

"Lisbon, you're shaking. You'll get sick."

"And you already are sick." Lisbon retorted.

They were silent for a moment.

"Well I guess that presents us with a problem then. Doesn't it."

Jane sighed.

"Look, we don't really need a shower shower, we just need to warm up somewhat. Maybe if we wore clothes we could just go at the same time?"

Lisbon looked at him in surprise. She was slightly speechless.

"And besides… I probably can't stand up that long unattended anyway… I'll probably end up passed out on the bathroom floor."

Lisbon took in all of the possibilities; wait for him and get sick herself, have him pass out on the floor (which by the way he was looking now seemed to be a possibility) or go first and risk him getting worse. It seemed the only thing they really could do was go together, (or maybe not, but she wasn't going to pass up this opportunity).

"Fine Jane. But no funny business."

He held his arms up in mock offence.

Lisbon just shook her head.

"Come on."

They headed to the laundry room, to put their wet clothes in the dryer. They both self consciously turned the other way while they were undressing.

Lisbon stripped down to her black singlet and underwear and turned around to find Jane staring at her, standing in nothing but his boxers.

Lisbon felt her eyes wander down to his well formed chest. How is it, that a man who does nothing but lie on a couch all day, can look this good?

She was broken out of her thoughts by Jane moving to put his suit in the dryer.

"Wont the dryer damage the suit?"

Jane shrugged.

"I guess we'll soon find out."

Lisbon laughed, but soon stopped, as she saw Jane looking over her body. She suddenly felt very exposed.

"How are you feeling?" she asked him, in the hopes to distract him.

His smile faltered.

"Not great." He admitted, patting his stomach softly.

"Do you still feel nauseous?"

He nodded shyly.

Lisbon looked at him concerned.

"Well we'll warm up and then get some medicine into you. There's bound to be something in my first aid kit."

Jane nodded in agreement. His belly let out a sluggish gurgle, seeming to agree too. He looked away embarrassed.

Lisbon chose not to say anything, thinking it would be unfair to stomp on his ego.

"Come on Jane."

She grabbed his hand and together they made their way to the kitchen, grabbing nightwear out of their bags. They turned and walked into the bathroom.

She turned the shower on, and while they waited for the shower to heat up, Lisbon walked over and hugged Jane, the urge unable to be resisted. They stood there, shivering in each other's arms, trying to get any body heat that the other possessed. Jane's skin was cold to the touch, but she could still feel the heat radiating from his fever. The bathroom slowly started to steam as the water heated, and soon they moved into the shower, returning to the same position.

They both stood there, clutching each other under the hot water.

Soon their shivering had died down and they both relaxed into each other. Their arms were wrapped tightly around each other, and her head was tucked securely under his chin.

Lisbon felt Jane tense as another gurgle reverberated from his stomach. He hiccupped, then burped, before he groaned.

"Maybe we should get dressed…" Lisbon said cautiously. She had no real intention of getting puked on, and if he were to get out of the shower and throw up in the toilet, he would just get cold again.

He nodded. He could feel his stomach beginning to reject him. There was a burning sensation at the top of his belly, and it was really beginning to bother him. This was not going to end well.

Lisbon turned off the water, grabbed a towel and stepped out of the bathroom. Jane took this as a sign that he should get dressed in her absence. He had managed to get a dry pair of boxers and his pajama bottoms on before he once again, lost the battle. He ran for the toilet, collapsing in front of it into a spasm of painful heaves.

Like before, he felt a small hand on his back, trying to offer him _some_ comfort. All of his breath was knocked out of him, as the next heave racked through his body. He couldn't remember vomiting ever being this painful, he felt as if he was bringing up his entire stomach.

Jane heard Lisbon gasp. He heaved again, this time not bringing anything up. Blindly, he reached out for the toilet paper, to wipe his streaming eyes and nose.

"Jane. Jane, please open your eyes."

He could hear the fear in Lisbon's voice. He only had a stomach bug. Nothing to worry about. He opened his eyes to reassure her, when something red caught his eye. He looked into the toilet to see a spray of red.

"Oh."

"Jane, come on. I'm taking you to the hospital."

"No. Please. I'm ok." He rasped.

"Jane you've been sick for nearly a week, and you're throwing up _blood_. Unless you have a good explanation…"

"Teresa… please. Not tonight. I'm too tired… Tomorrow… if I have to."

Lisbon shut the toilet lid and flushed. She reached out and place the back of her hand on his forehead.

"I'm getting the thermometer."

Jane didn't even have time to argue, before he saw her back retreating through the door.

"I seem to be doing this a lot with you lately." She popped the device into his mouth. The device beeped after a minute.

"Jane… it's 103.4. Seriously… please let me take you to a hospital." She was starting to feel exasperated. She knew he hated hospitals, but she couldn't understand why he wouldn't let her take him to be treated.

He shook his head.

"If I still feel sick tomorrow, then you can take me. But you've just got warm and dry, I'll be ok."

Lisbon moved to sit by him.

"Jane. Something could be seriously wrong. You shouldn't vomit blood. Your fever shouldn't be so high." She paused, trying to decide if she wanted to add her thoughts. She decided she would try anything. "I'm really starting to worry about you."

Jane looked up at her then, her eyes were starting to brim with tears. He tried to look reassuringly at her.

"All I need is a good night's sleep."

Lisbon cursed in frustration.

"Damn you, you stubborn man!"

Jane chuckled weakly.

"If your temperature gets over 104, I'm making the call. With or without your approval."

Jane winced. She was using her boss tone. He hated it when she pulled the Agent Lisbon card.

"Fine." He pouted.

Lisbon knew she could get her way now, but she didn't want to breach his trust. She would be keeping an eye on his temp and if his condition seemed to worsen, she would make the call anyway.

"Come on Jane, let's get you off the floor and into bed."

He nodded in approval.

She pulled him up, careful to support him when he was upright. She knew he was dizzy. She guided him to the bedroom, where she pulled back the sheets, and eased him onto the bed.

"My shirt…"

"You'll be fine without it… especially if you don't want your fever to spike any higher."

He nodded, too tired to care. She helped him lay back onto the pillows, cringing slightly as he winced in pain. She pulled the covers up and tucked him in.

"I'll be back in a second."

She didn't wait for his response. She went into the laundry room, searching through the broom cupboard. She returned to the room with a bucket, which she placed on the floor beside him.

"Just in case."

He nodded, no amount of humor in his face.

Lisbon made her way to the other side of the bed, turning on her bedside lamp. She left the room, turning off the main light as she went, and made her way to the bathroom. She brushed her teeth and splashed her face with warm water, trying to calm herself down a little. She really hoped that it wouldn't come to having to call 911. He was going through enough.

She sighed and made her way back to the bedroom, closing the door quietly behind her. Jane was curled up in the foetal position, his arms wrapped around himself.

Lisbon crawled into her side of the bed. She tried to relax Jane a bit by rubbing his back. After a few minutes, she decided to try a new tactic.

"Jane, roll onto your back."

"Why?" he half moaned.

"Because, I want to try something."

Jane rolled onto his back, groaning as he went.

Lisbon tucked an arm under his neck, pulling him onto her chest. She used one arm to stroke his curls, and the other to make small circles on his stomach. He sighed in satisfaction.

"Jane, you feel really bloated."

"Mmmmph."

Lisbon sighed and reached over to turn the bedside light off. She snuggled back down, readjusting Jane on her chest. She returned her hand to his belly, rubbing in a circular motion.

She felt Jane relax against her a few moments later. Knowing he was finally in some sort of slumber, she let herself be succumbed into a light sleep.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

She was woken by the sound of gagging. Turning over she turned the bedside light on. Jane was leaning over the bed, clasping the bucket and shaking in a fit of painful spasms. Lisbon crawled out of bed so she was sitting next to him. Again, she started rubbing his back. He was vomiting blood again.

_Damn._

He let out one last racking heave and sat back on the bed, leaning against the wall with his eyes closed.

"Jane?"

No response.

She reached out and touch his forehead. He was burning to the touch.

"Shit."

Jane crack his eyes open and gave her a small, weak smile.

"Jane… what do I do?" she was really frightened now.

She never received an answer, because his eyes rolled into the back of his head as he let the sickness take hold of him.

"Oh my god."

She grabbed her cell phone off of the bedside table and dialed 911. She gave them his name and condition, as well as spouting off the motel they were staying at. The lady on the other end, disconnected the call, telling her they would be there very soon. After she hung up the phone, she got to work, doing her best to wake him.

"Come on Jane! Don't do this!" she said sternly.

No response.

She shook his shoulder, trying to get him to wake up.

No response.

"Please?" she whispered, as a single tear rolled down her cheek.

**Poor Jane =( and poor Lisbon!**

**I swear this wasn't what I had planned when I started writing this chapter… seems my creative juices have a mind of their own…**

**Please R&R =] x**


	19. Chapter 18

**A/N as promised.. here it is a lot earlier =]**

**Warning: There's only so much research the internet can provide, so if my description of Jane's diagnosis isn't 100% accurate.. then I apologize =]**

_(Greer's POV)_

Greer had a strange feeling. It wasn't as if she was feeling sick or anything.. but she had this tightening in her chest. She had noticed how worried Teresa had been about her father, and it was starting to bother her. She hadn't heard from either of them since Teresa had come to visit. Usually he would call, to say goodnight, but tonight, there was nothing.

She turned over and looked at the clock. 4am.

What if something had happened? What if there was something wrong with Patrick? Or Teresa had had an accident on her way?

She sighed in frustration.

Greer grabbed her phone, making to call Teresa, but stopped. Any sane person would be asleep right now.. and besides… she was probably worrying about nothing… right?

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

_(Lisbon's POV)_

Lisbon was sitting in the waiting room of the emergency department. Waiting for the EMT's to arrive had been one of the worse things she had ever had to do. Jane still hadn't gained consciousness in the ambulance, and she hadn't heard anything since she had been carted off by a nurse to a waiting room. The nurse had returned with a blanket, noticing she was still in her pyjamas. That was nearly an hour ago, and Lisbon was starting to go insane from the waiting. She was usually a very patient person, but today… not so much.

She couldn't stop thinking the worst. What if he died? What if something was seriously wrong? She couldn't bear to lose him, not after she had only just admitted to herself that she loved him… she wished she had told him now. She was scared she would never get a chance to.

He had just looked so ill. The last time she saw someone throwing up blood, ended up having lung cancer… but Jane couldn't have lung cancer.. he had been complaining of abdominal pain, not chest pain. This was just a virus gone wrong. It had to be…

Lisbon was brought out of her thoughts by a middle aged man in a lab coat entering the room.

"Are you here for Mr Jane?"

Lisbon got to her feet in a rush.

"I'm Doctor Wynters." He said extending his hand.

"Teresa Lisbon." She didn't bother with the agent formalities, but shook the doctors hand politely.

"How is he?"

"He's awake now."

Lisbon nodded, wrapping her arms around herself. Now that she knew he was alive, she felt the exhaustion take over her like she had been hit by a bus.

The doctor, noticing her discomfort, motioned to a seat. They both sat down.

"What's wrong with him?"

The doctor opened Jane's file.

"We believe he has acute Gastritis." The doctor took note of Lisbon's confused face and continued. "Gastritis is when the stomach lining is inflamed or swollen. This is most commonly caused by extreme stress, or a bacterial infection."

Lisbon nodded, waiting for the doctor to continue.

"Has Mr Jane been under any extra stress lately?"

Lisbon almost laughed. _Lately_? Try the last eight or nine years. He hadn't had a break from stress, and then finding about Greer… Lisbon realised the news had driven him over the edge.

"He found out about a week ago that his daughter is dying of cancer." She didn't bother with the rest of it, no point completely spelling out his life to a stranger.

The doctor just nodded sadly.

"When he arrived here his fever had spiked to 104.4 so we've got him on a saline drip to rehydrate him, as well as regular courses of Paracetamol to try to lower his fever."

"Why did he lose consciousness for so long?"

Lisbon had been around people that have passed out, but they always woke up after a couple of minutes, or they were somewhat responsive. Jane wasn't.

"He could have passed out from a number of reasons; his fever, dehydration, lack of nutrients, loss of blood… or even just extreme exhaustion."

Lisbon nodded. This was a lot to take in, in such a short period of time.

"When can I see him?"

"I have a nurse running some tests right now, but she can come and get you when she's finished."

"Thank you." Lisbon was on the verge of tears.

The doctor placed a comforting hand on her arm.

"I'll come and check on the both of you, once we know the results."

Lisbon shook the doctors hand again and then he left, and she was alone… again.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

About ten years later (ten minutes), the nurse walked in to find a very disgruntled Lisbon, pacing around the room.

"Miss Lisbon?"

Lisbon looked up and sighed with relief.

"Oh.. thank god. I've been going crazy!"

The nurse smiled kindly.

"I'm Jessie, Patrick's nurse. He's been asking for you."

"Really?" Lisbon asked in disbelief.

"More like demanding." Jessie laughed.

Lisbon smiled.

"Can I see him?"

"Of course, this way." She motioned down the corridor.

"He's been moved to a private room, but I must warn you, he's still in a bad way."

Lisbon felt her heart sink.

"What do you mean by that?" Was it possible that she had been lead into a false sense of security and he still wasn't out of the woods? Shit.. she really should have asked the doctor more questions about his condition.

"His temperature is still very high, and he still hasn't managed to last longer than 20 minutes without vomiting. Usually we wouldn't let you in yet, but it seems to be distressing him more with you not being there.

Lisbon merely nodded in response.

When they reached his room, the nurse spoke again.

"I'll leave you two alone for a while, but if you need anything, just press the buzzer and someone will come. I'll be back to check on Mr Jane in ten minutes."

Lisbon gave the girl a small smile.

"Thank you Jessie."

Jessie smiled back, and left to check on another patient.

Lisbon stood outside his room for a while longer, hiding behind the wall as his door had to be kept open. She had been so anxious to see him only moments ago, but now she was scared. She had no idea what she was going to find when she opened the door. She hated the unknown.

But Jane needed her, and on top of her fears, she knew she needed to see him, to know he was alive.

With a rush of courage, she moved from her hiding spot, and entered his room.

The first thing she noticed was how pale he was. It was almost as if his skin blended into the white of the bed sheets. He had an IV line in his left arm, that lead up to a drip containing a clear solution. On his tray table, he had an emesis basin and water pitcher. He was lying awkwardly, with his arms wrapped around his stomach. His eyes were closed and he still hadn't noticed her standing there.

The first thing she thought of, after taking in her surroundings was that he looked like death. If it wasn't for the small regular beep being emitted from the machine, she would have thought he was dead.

Tentatively, she walked over and sat by his bed. At the sound of her footsteps, he opened his eyes and looked at her. Seeing that it was Lisbon, and not another nurse, he let out a small smile.

"Hey" he cracked.

Lisbon felt her eyes fill with tears.

"Hey." She reached out and grabbed his hand, careful not to hurt his injured knuckle.

"How are you feeling?" It was a stupid question, but she didn't know what else to say.

He smiled though, touched at how much she really did care for him.

"I'm ok."

"Jane." She gave him a knowing look.

"Well, I will be ok."

"The doctors say you have Gastritis… they said it was caused from extreme stress."

Jane looked guiltily at her.

"I'm sorry Lisbon."

Lisbon looked at him, completely taken aback.

"You have _nothing _to be sorry for!"

"Yes I do." He paused, shifting slowly so he was sitting up a little more. "If I hadn't have snapped at you the other day, I wouldn't have worked myself up so much. You calm me down, you make me feel safe… and I didn't want any of that. I wanted to feel miserable, I felt I deserved it… and getting you away from me was the only way that was going to happen."

Lisbon rubbed his palm with the padding on her thumb.

"And now?"

She couldn't look him in the eye.

"It was the stupidest thing I've ever done, Teresa."

Lisbon looked up at the sound of her first name.

"Now I'm trapped in Malibu hospital, I can't see Greer, I _feel_ horrible… and to be honest, I hate seeing you look so hurt… and knowing that I'm causing that hurt."

Lisbon reached out and cupped the side of his face, noticing how hot his skin felt.

"I will always be here for you Patrick. Just don't push me away again."

"Ok."

"Promise?"

He nodded.

Lisbon watched as Jane's face winced in pain. He brought his hand down to his stomach and struggled to sit up.

"Lisbon… I'm sorry… please… the basin."

Lisbon thrust the basin under his chin and helped support him up as another bound of painful heaves, took a hold of his body.

He finished throwing up moments later. He wasn't really bringing much up, just dry heaving in painful bursts.

Lisbon took the basin, emptied it and placed it back on the table. She took a cloth and wiped his mouth. As she was filling a cup from the water pitcher, Jane started to protest.

"Lisbon, you don't have to that." He eased himself back into the pillows.

"Now Jane… the last time I let you get your way, you ended up unconscious. I'm here… so let me look after you… I need you to be ok."

Jane nodded slowly, realization hitting him like a ton of bricks… she loved him back. He let Lisbon shove the straw into his mouth, he took a couple of pulls, but didn't really want anything in his stomach.

Besides… here was his less wet opportunity…

"Lisbon… Teresa…" she had moved, and was now sponging his forehead with a damp cloth. The cold water felt like heaven on his heated skin. _Wait.. he was getting sidetracked…_

He reached out and gently turned her face so she was looking at him in the eye.

"I've never met someone like you before. You're like dynamite in the field, ready to blow up on anyone who deserves it… and then.. out of the blue I see another side of you… this caring, soft amazing side that I always knew was there, but never thought I'd see. Teresa… I think I'm falling in love with you."

Jane watched as so many different emotions darted across her face; confusion, questioning, excitement, and then finally settling on a soft smile.

"I love you too." She bent over and kissed his forehead. A smirk played on her lips. "But I don't love you enough to kiss you on the lips when you've been vomiting all night."

He smiled sheepishly at her.

She brushed his curls out of his face.

"I guess we can add lovesick to the list… seeing as man-flu actually seemed to be a symptom."

Jane opened his mouth, as if to say something, but thought better of it.

"Well, you ended up in the hospital…"

"Haha Lisbon… but I said intensive care…"

Lisbon looked sternly at him.

"Yes… you did, but don't you go getting worse and ending up in the ICU, just to prove a point."

Jane made a cross over his heart.

Lisbon giggled. Even when he was feeling so sick, he could still manage to make her laugh. He really was incredible.

"When did you know?" Jane asked.

Lisbon, who caught on straight away, answered immediately.

"Now that I think about it, I think I always have loved you… but the first time I actually realized it was last night… halfway between Sacramento and Malibu."

Jane smiled at this.

"I've loved you from the moment I first laid eyes on you… but the love changed over the years… I too, came to the realization last night… just after I had thrown up the first time."

Lisbon chuckled.

"Wow, that's romantic. Standing in the freezing cold after you were just sick and suddenly you fall in love with me?"

Jane smiled and shook his head.

"No it was when I realized you would do anything for me, and I you."

Lisbon felt her heart swell with happiness. She hadn't felt this great since she had been promoted to head of the unit, and even now, comparing the two feelings, she felt on top of the world.

She brought his hand up to her mouth, and planted a sweet kiss on his knuckles.

"Lisbon… I know you said you wouldn't kiss me.. but would you lie with me? You really helped last night." His request was almost shy and Lisbon found it kind of endearing.

"Of course Jane."

She placed the cool cloth on his forehead, before she moved around to the right side of the bed and sat down. She waited for Jane to shift over, before she lay beside him. He snuggled into her almost immediately after she wrapped her arms around him. He reached up, pulling her right hand down to his stomach.

She giggled at his abruptness, but complied all the same, by rubbing small circles through his hospital gown.

After a few moments, she felt him relax against her.

"Better?"

"Much." he sighed into her chest.

"Lisbon, I…"

"Shh… Jane… just try to relax."

"Mmmmph.. ok"

He had to be exhausted and his unintelligible answer proved that.

Only moments later, Lisbon heard a soft snore come from Jane's mouth. Lisbon looked down, to see he had in fact fallen asleep in her arms again. Considering the circumstances, Lisbon couldn't help but feel a little blessed. It was so ironic that so many bad things had lead her to this moment… Jane's family's horrible murder, had brought them together in the first place. Greer showing up in their lives, and then them finding out about her cancer, that had caused them to come together in ways that were almost impossible to explain. And now… with him lying in her arms in a hospital bed… his illness had caused them both to admit their love for each other… Lisbon felt like she was in a fairy tale. He would be her happily ever after. They still had a tough road ahead, with Jane getting better and with Greer…

Lisbon felt her heart sink. The poor girl didn't have long… it almost seemed as if this tragedy would never end.

_But one mustn't think that way_. No, Lisbon needed to think positive, and keep an open mind. It was the only way either of them were going to survive this. Lisbon felt her own exhaustion wash over her. The night had been so long. It would be a night that she would much rather forget, but also a night she would cherish forever. Her and Jane had fallen in love. She smiled happily and closed her eyes.

Slowly, but surely, Jane's rhythmic snores lullabied Lisbon into her own sleep.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

_(Jessie's POV)_

Just under five minutes later, Jessie poked her head around the corner. She smiled at the sleeping couple on the bed, it really made the job worthwhile, seeing scenes like this. It wasn't against hospital protocol to let them sleep like that, but it was highly frowned upon. The nurse shrugged. They had been trying to get Mr Jane to calm down since he had arrived, the extra stress wasn't going to help his condition at all… and it seemed that five minutes alone with Miss Lisbon, and she could calm him to sleep.

No drug is more powerful, than being taken care of by the person you love.

She silently walked into his room and took his vitals down from the monitor. She turned the volume down on the thermometer (so it wouldn't beep in his ear and wake him) and softly stuck the device in his ear.

"Hmmm…" Jessie whispered at the reading. "103.6… still too high Mr Jane." She made a note on his chart to raise his Paracetamol dosage.

She rinsed the cloth under the tap and placed it gently, back on Jane's forehead.

She left the room with a satisfied smile. It wasn't every day she managed to take a patient's vitals without waking them.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

_(Greer's POV)_

8:06.

Greer had lay awake all night worrying. She still hadn't heard anything and it had taken all of her willpower not to make the call. She had made a deal with herself, that once the clock reached 8:09, she would try her father's cell. If he didn't pick up, then at 8:13, she would call Teresa.

She had busied herself by counting the seconds. She thought to herself, if she counted to 180, then the three minutes would be up and she would be able to call Patrick.

_1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12….._

_Ugh! _This hospital really was wearing her patients thin. If it wasn't for her being stuck in hospital, she could go and find them… if she wasn't in hospital in general… they wouldn't be gone at all.

8:07.

Her mother had left last night. Gone to find a "real" motel. Said that the hospital motels weren't _adequate_ enough for her standards. Greer was used to her mother's childish behavior. She had known her whole life that the most important person in her mother's world, was Tracy. No matter what Greer did, she could never seem to please her. Nothing was ever good enough. Then she was diagnosed with cancer and all of that _had_ to change. It wasn't like her mother liked it. It was just what had to happen. Greer had grown to know and love the staff in the Oncology Ward, at the hospital in Michigan. They were there for her more than anyone.

At the start her friends had been there, but as she had gotten sicker and lost her hair, she had urged them to stay away, to get on with their lives. They had refused, of course, but Greer was adamant she didn't want to bring them down with her. She wanted them to live their lives to the full, without always having to worry about if… or _when _she was going to die.

Greer turned and looked at her clock again. 8:09.

She let out a sigh of relief and grabbed her cell phone. Just as she was about to dial Patrick's number, her phone started ringing.

Caller ID: Teresa Lisbon.

Greer stared at her phone in disbelief.

"Huh… 8:09…"

She answered the phone quickly.

"Hello?"

"Hey Greer.. it's Teresa."

"Oh hi! How are you?"

Greer felt as if she should play the cheerful card.

"I'm… I'm ok…"

Greer felt her heart drop. Something definitely wasn't right.

"And Patrick…? How's he?"

She heard Lisbon let out a long breath. She sounded exhausted.

"Greer, yeah.. there's something I need to tell you."

"Teresa.. what's happened?" she asked in a rush.

"Um… Jane's sick. We're at the hospital in Malibu."

"What's happened?" she repeated. She had managed to keep her voice somewhat calm, but on the inside, she was beginning to panic.

"He has Gastritis.. it's a stomach condition that we believe has been caused from extreme stress."

Extreme stress… caused by her. Greer started felt the guilt creep through her veins again.

"Is he ok?"

"He's in a pretty bad way at the moment… but he _will_ be ok."

Greer paused, trying to gather her bearings.

"How do you mean.. he's in a bad way."

She heard Lisbon sigh again.

"His temperature isn't coming down.. they think there is a bacterial infection as well as the stress related Gastritis… but we have to wait for the test result to come back before they can treat him."

"Can I speak to him?"

"I'm sorry Greer, he's asleep right now. The doctors want him to get as much rest as he can. I've snuck out to call you."

"Ok… well.. thank you for calling me Teresa…"

"No problem Greer. I'll call you back as soon as we know what's going on."

"Thank you." she said quietly.

"Oh… and Greer.. I'm taking care of him…"

Greer smiled at this. It was about time the stubborn man finally lay low and let her.

"That's great. Call me when you find out anything."

"Will do.. see ya.."

"Bye."

Greer disconnected the call and lay back against her pillows. She now knew what it was like to truly worry about someone… but she believed Teresa.. she was looking after him… he would be ok… he had to be ok. There were too many people counting on him.

**Please review!**


	20. Chapter 19

**A/N thank you to those of you who are still with me! Only a few more chapters to go!**

"Jane! Great news." Lisbon walked into the white room with a look of excitement on her face. Jane looked up from his Sudoku puzzle, taking note of the happiness in Lisbon's voice.

"Are they gonna let me out?" he asked hopefully.

Lisbon's face fell slightly.

"No, I'm sorry Jane, not yet."

Jane looked away, upset. He had been in this hell-hole for the past three days and he was getting frustrated. They had cocktailed him with antibiotics, and he was still on regular amounts of painkillers. It had been nearly five days since either he or Lisbon had seen Greer, and he felt as if he had abandoned her. He had talked to her on the phone a couple of times, and she had sounded worried and upset. She was scared because he was so sick, but Jane also knew better. She was scared he wasn't going to be out in time… that she wasn't going to get to say goodbye.

"Jane?" Lisbon asked, causing him to look up at her. She paused for a moment. "Don't you want to know what my good news is?"

"Oh right, yes sorry Lisbon… what's happened?" Jane asked tiredly.

Lisbon sat down on the side of his bed. It had become habit, them being close to each other. It calmed both of them down.

"I talked to your doctor… and he's agreed to transfer you back to Sacramento!"

Jane's eyes locked with hers as he felt his heart swelled with happiness. He knew she had been up to something the last day or two, but she wouldn't tell him what it was.

"Oh, Teresa… thank you." He reached out and grabbed her hand.

They sat there, staring silently into each other's eyes, when someone knocked on the door.

"Mr Jane, you have a visitor."

The pair looked up to see his nurse standing in his doorway.

"Send them in Jessie." Jane replied slightly confused. He had no idea who would come and visit, only the team and Greer knew he was here, and they were in Sacramento.

Jessie disappeared out the door, and moments later, Jane heard a familiar click of heels, coming towards his room.

"Oh, no." he breathed.

Lisbon looked at Jane momentarily confused, until she heard a memorable voice, emit from the doorway.

"Well, well, well. What do we have here?"

Lisbon tightened her hold on Jane's hand and looked up, confirming the identity of the voice.

Tracy.

She walked purposefully into the room.

"Would you excuse us please." She said dismissively, directing her gaze at Lisbon. "I need to speak with Patrick alone."

Lisbon looked worriedly at Jane, he nodded, signalling that it was ok. Lisbon leant forward and gave Jane a kiss on the forehead before retreating out the door. She pointedly gave Tracy a dirty look as she walked past.

Tracy smiled at her retreating back.

"Feisty one you've got there Patty. Better be careful the cat doesn't bite your tongue."

Jane ignored her comment, instead he busied himself with sitting up in bed, so he had a better angle to glare at her.

"What do you want Tracy?"

"No need to be unkind, Patrick."

She made her way further into the room, advancing on Jane. She leant forward and propped his pillows up a little more for him, and tried to cup his cheek. He leant away from her touch.

She snatched her hand back, the glint in her eyes turning dangerous.

"You let _her _touch you."

Jane shrugged. "I trust her. You on the other hand… I don't even think that word lies within your vocabulary anymore."

Tracy scoffed at him and took a seat on the chair beside his bed.

"You really are selfish, aren't you Patty. Always have been, it was always about you."

"Excuse me?"

"Your daughter is lying in a hospital bed, seven hours away, and you go and stress yourself out and end up in hospital. Your always thinking of yourself!"

Jane looked at her awestruck.

"You're saying it's _my _fault that I'm in hospital? Really? Because I actually _want _to be in here? You're far more daft than I ever thought possible."

"And yet here we are."

Jane looked like he might slap her. He certainly wanted to, he wanted to try to knock some sense into this cheap imitation of the woman she used to be.

"Yes. Here _we _are." He made a point of looking directly into her eyes, trying to show that he could be as dangerous as she. "Tell me Tracy, why is it _you're _here? Why aren't _you _at home by Greer's side?"

Tracy sighed.

"She's missed you. I came down here to try convince your doctors to transfer you."

"Well, if you thought to call, you would have learnt that Teresa has already organised that. I'm being transferred within the hour."

Tracy looked blankly at him.

"Oh."

"Yeah, oh."

Jane watched as Tracy's eyes turned venomous. She stared at him, as if she were a snake, ready to pounce.

"She is _my _daughter. I'm the one who's been there, and yet she would rather have you by her bedside than me. Why is that, do you think?"

"Possibly because I've actually given her the time of day! You're more interested in what motel you're staying at. You don't really care, all you're concerned about is how this is affecting _your _life!"

Jane heard a _crack_ and felt the sting on his cheek before he had even registered her movements. He brought a hand up to his jaw, rubbing his reddening cheek. He glanced up at her, she was seething mad, her heavily makeuped face taking a deadly tone.

"How dare you!"

"Tracy, I taught you everything you know. I can tell when you're putting on an act, and from your reaction, I can see you've hit home."

Tracy scowled at him.

"She is my daughter, _my _responsibility. And… and you can stay the hell away from her!"

Jane looked up at her in horror.

"Yes! that's right!" her voice had taken a tone of hysteria. "When you get back to Sacramento, I will be making a point that you do not enter her room!"

"You can't do that!" he was shouting now, his own voice taking a role of panic. "You kept her from me! She would have been my responsibility too, if I had have known she even existed!"

He was getting really worked up now. He was starting to feel the burning sensation at the top of his abdomen again. He brought a hand to his stomach and scrunched is face in pain.

He opened his eyes to see Tracy standing over him, she was smiling victoriously.

He felt hatred wash over him. She had planned this. She had been trying to work him up from the beginning, trying to keep him here longer.

"You can't… do this!" he panted though the pain. He doubled over into the foetal position, letting out a sharp moan.

"What's going on in here?"

Jessie had returned to take Jane's vitals, and had walked in on the scene. She had caught a glimpse of Tracy's smiling face before making her appearance known, now the woman's features had turned impassive with worry. Jessie could tell from the look on Jane's face that he wanted the visitor out!

"Excuse me ma'am, but I'm going to have to ask you to leave." Jessie said forcefully as she made her way over to comfort her patient. "Patrick, I need you to calm down!" she said rubbing his shoulder. She turned back over her shoulder to look at Tracy. "Now, if you don't mind."

She received a dirty look from the visitor, and smiled, knowing she had pissed off someone, who had worked up her patient.

"What happened Patrick?" she asked, once she had heard her heels click out the door.

Jane was still in the foetal position, his arms wrapped around himself.

"Bloody woman… said I couldn't… see Greer." He mumbled through strangled breaths.

Jessie had heard all about Greer over the past few days, and she knew that he was desperate to get back to her.

"Patrick, I'm going to get you some morphine, and then we can talk, ok?"

Jane nodded and she quickly left. He quite liked the nurse. When Lisbon went to get herself some food, or take a shower, Jessie would come and visit between rounds and they would talk. Jane had found her to be both an excellent listener, as well as an orator.

She returned a few moments later with a syringe, and injected the painkiller into his IV.

Lisbon arrived with two Styrofoam cups, to see Jessie injecting something in a pain stricken Jane. She rushed to his side, placing the cups on the table.

"What happened?" she asked, stroking the side of Jane's face.

"He was just about to tell me." Jessie answered. "Just give him a couple of seconds for the morphine to kick in."

Lisbon nodded and took a seat. She had grown fond of the nurse. She wouldn't have been able to get through this in once piece without her. It gave her piece of mind to know that Jane was in capable hands whenever she had to leave his side.

"Jane?" she coaxed.

"It was Tracy… she said I wasn't allowed to see Greer. Said I wasn't allowed to enter her room."

Jane looked away miserably.

"But Patrick…" Jessie said, a slight mischievous twinkle in her eye. "You'll have your own room."

"Yes… what's your point?"

"Well, there's nothing stopping Greer from seeing _you, _is there?"

Jane looked like he wanted to hug the girl.

"You're right!"

"I can organise it too." Lisbon said. "The old bitch didn't ban me from seeing her."

Jane grabbed Lisbon's hand and brought it to his mouth. They smiled sweetly at each other.

"An orderly will be in soon, to get you ready for transfer." Jessie said.

Jane nodded and smiled gratefully at the nurse.

"Thank you Jessie, for everything." He said sincerely.

"It's been my pleasure Patrick. You just keep yourself out of trouble."

They smiled at each other.

"Hopefully if I ever see you again, it will be under different circumstances. I don't want to see your face in here again." She chuckled at him.

"Goodbye Jessie." Jane said, eyes twinkling.

"See ya Patrick."

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Jane enjoyed the ride back to Sacramento. He was enjoying being out of the horrible hospital gown, and he had come up with a plan. He was sitting in the passenger seat of Lisbon's mustang, as the hospital had allowed her to transfer him. His main reason for still being in the hospital was to ensure he had the full course of antibiotics without side effects, and because his temperature still hadn't come all the way down. He would be admitted for another three days, at least, but he no longer minded. As long as he was in his own room, he could see Greer, and it also gave him time to work on his plan.

He had decided to make a bucket list for Greer. It would be small, nothing too extravagant, because he knew it would just tire both of them out, but it would be special. He had a lot to do, in so little time, but he was enjoying the task.

Before he had left the hospital in Malibu, the doctor had given him strict instructions to stay as stress free as he could, otherwise he would be having a repeat episode of the scene after Tracy.

He turned to look at Lisbon. They were still to kiss properly… one where they were both sober, and actually on the lips. They had had intimate moments, loving kisses to the forehead or hand or cheek, but never the mouth. He could sense Lisbon's uncertainty on the matter, but he was adamant he was going to make her comfortable enough. He wanted a taste of what they could really have. He thought that maybe she had been waiting until he had stopped vomiting, but that had happened days ago, and still no kiss.

He sighed with longing.

"Everything alright there Jane? You feeling ok?"

Jane looked at her and smiled. She had asked this every half an hour since they had left Malibu. He knew she was worried out of her mind, and the Tracy incident hadn't helped at all.

"I'm alright Lisbon. Quit worrying. I'll tell you if something's wrong." He reached out and took her hand in his cherishing the warmth on his cold skin.

"You're cold Jane, let me turn the heating up."

"Lisbon." Jane said seriously. "I'm ok. Just relax."

Lisbon leant back into her seat, eyes on the road.

"I'm sorry Jane. But they really should have taken you in an ambulance. I'll be ok once we make it to Sacramento.

"Meh.."

"Why don't you lean back and get some sleep?"

Jane sighed. She was only trying to help. Maybe if he pretended to be asleep she would calm down a little… he was kind of tired anyway.

"Ok." He reclined the chair back a little. "Night." He said relaxing into the chair and closing his eyes.

Lisbon let a small smile play on her lips. She loved watching him sleep, he looked so peaceful.

"Night Jane."

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

While Jane was getting comfortable in his new room, Lisbon went to visit Greer. They had set up a new IV in his arm, and one of the nurses had bought him in some dry toast. He looked at it in disgust, but he knew he had to eat to take his antibiotics.

He felt slightly jealous of Lisbon getting to see Greer right away. He would give anything to be able to see her. he knew Lisbon was organising it with the oncology department for Greer to come and see him though, and that thought cheered him up somewhat.

He finished his toast and took his cocktail of pills, before relaxing back into the bed. At least the bed here was more comfortable than the one in Malibu. He sighed in content, knowing he would get to see Greer again soon. And because so much had happened since the last time he was in Sacramento. He had gotten sick yes, but he had also managed to fall in love.

No matter what happened, he now knew he had Lisbon by his side, to help him through anything.

He heard voices outside his room, and the rattle of a wheelchair. Then a blonde head popped around the side of his door, a huge grin plastered to her face.

Jane mirrored her smile and sat up in bed.

"Well, this makes for a change." Greer said happily. "It's funny that I'm now the one visiting you."

She wheeled herself to the side of his bed and took his hand in hers.

"Oh dad, what have you done to yourself?"

Jane beamed at the use of the title. He loved it when she called him dad, it made everything feel all the more real. He saw Lisbon standing in the doorway, studying the pair, Greer hadn't noticed her yet.

"Well, I pushed away someone very special to me, and worked myself up into such a state, that I got sick." He had caught Lisbon's eye as he had been saying this. Lisbon smiled, and then left, deciding to leave the pair alone for a while.

"But you'll be ok? Right?"

Jane knew there was a deeper meaning to her question, but decided not to address it upfront.

"I will be ok, as long as Teresa is around to look after me."

Greer grinned at this.

"First name basis now ae?"

Jane blushed.

"Well, we came to some certain… revelations over the past week. It seems the young Teresa and I, have fallen head over heels."

Greer smiled triumphantly, her eyes widening.

"I knew it! I knew there was more than that friendship babble you two were going on about!"

Jane laughed.

"You know you probably knew before the two of us did."

"Of course I did! You guys were seriously blind… or in denial."

"Or both." Jane finished.

Greer's smile faltered. Jane noticed her sudden mood change and looked anxiously into her eyes.

"What's wrong Greer?"

She fidgeted with her hands nervously.

"Teresa said you had a fight with my mom."

Jane sighed and relaxed back into the bed.

"She told me I wasn't allowed to see you. That's why you had to come to me."

Greer nodded, looking angry.

"That's not her decision to make. I came to find you, you're _my _father, she can't decide who I can and can't see!"

"Greer, honey, calm down."

"I'll calm down once I've talked to her. You're my father, you have every right to be able to come and see me."

Jane smiled at her determination.

"Leave it to me, I'll even make her apologize, if you like?"

"No, that's ok, just a free passage to see my daughter."

He suddenly felt a sharp sting at the top of his stomach and pulled in a sharp intake of breath. Greer, noticing his pain started to worry.

"Are you ok? Do you need a nurse? Can I get you anything?" she asked frantically.

Jane almost laughed. He exhaled slowly as the pain subsided.

"You're just as bad as Lisbon."

Greer looked at him with mock offense.

"Are you ok though?"

"Yeah. Just need these damn antibiotics to work faster."

Greer sat back in her seat.

"Did they say what actually caused it?"

"A build up of stress, not eating properly, and I also had a bacterial infection that flared up. They said the bacteria is passed through water, and living as a carny, I didn't always have access to clean water."

Greer nodded.

"Do you know how long you're gonna be in here for?"

Jane shook his head.

"They said a couple of days, but after what happened at the hospital before I left, it may be longer."

"What happened?"

Jane looked guiltily at her. He didn't like making her mother out to be the bad guy… as much as she was.

"After your mother and I fought, I stressed and induced an episode. I had to have a dose of morphine for the first time in days. It was a bit of a setback."

Greer stared furiously at the floor.

"When she gets back…"

Jane chuckled at her high spirit. She really did remind him of Lisbon.

They heard the sound of footsteps and a nurse poked her head around the door.

"Time for you to go back to your room Greer, let Mr Jane get his rest."

Greer nodded at the nurse, and stood up on shaky legs to give Jane a hug.

"I'll come back and see you soon."

He smiled, returning the embrace.

"I'd like that Greer."

She sat back in her wheelchair and the nurse came over the take her back to the oncology ward.

"I love you dad."

Jane felt happiness rush through him.

"I love you too kiddo."

He watched her disappear into the corridor, feeling like a new man.

**Please review =]**


	21. Chapter 20

**A/N wow.. has it really been that long since I updated last? Well.. I'm hopeless aren't I?**

**Hopefully this happy chappie makes things a little better =]**

_(Greer's POV)_

Patrick had been discharged from hospital in Sacramento a few days ago. It was Thursday night and Greer was lying in her hospital room, enveloped in the silence. While Patrick had been in the hospital, she had spent most of her time, lazing about in the arm chair beside his bed. They had managed to play about forty games of chess, most of them she had won.. but she was guessing he had let her. It was almost as if he was making up for all those lost years of letting her win snakes and ladders. But since he had been discharged, she hadn't really seen much of him… or Teresa… come to think of it, she hadn't really seen much of anyone since his departure.

So here she was, lying in bed, hooked up to different wires, completely and utterly bored. There was no longer talk of her being discharged. The nurses had begun to act extra nice to her, some even slipping an extra chocolate pudding onto her tray. She could feel herself deteriorating by the minute. She could almost feel the strength seeping out of her veins with every passing moment. Her time was running short.

It made her sad to think that she wouldn't get to see Patrick and Teresa get married… she smiled at the thought. Well, ok marriage did seem a little far into the future… but there was just so much she was going to miss out on.

Greer rolled on her side, in search of a more interesting spot on the wall to stare at. She hated feeling sorry for herself. But in moments like these, when she was alone, sometimes it felt nice to wallow in her own self pity.

She closed her eyes, pretending to be asleep when she heard a low click as the nurse entered into her room to administer her sleep and pain meds. She let the nurse leave, before whispering a small prayer for her friends and family, and finally drifting off to sleep.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Greer woke up on Friday morning, to sunlight pouring into her room. Someone had pulled to curtains on her.

"Urgh… what the..?"

She brought her hands up to her face, shielding her eyes from the sun. Patrick was standing by the window, a mischievous smile playing on his face.

"Come on lazy bones, get up."

"What..? Why?" Greer moaned.

Jane chuckled slightly.

"Good to see you truly are like every other lazy teenager on the planet." He chuckled.

"What time is it?"

She saw him check his watch.

"It's past ten, now come on, get up! We're going to the beach!" he smiled dazzlingly at her.

"What do you mean we're going to the beach? I'm not allowed to leave this hospital without my doctors permission."

Jane clapped his hands together.

"Ahh, glad we got to that.." he produced a piece of paper from his jacket pocket. "Freshly signed… so… Get up!"

Greer looked suspiciously at him.

"You're planning something ridiculous… I can see the madness in your eyes."

"Oh come on…" he whined, "Don't make me get Agent Lisbon in here!"

Greer chuckled.

"Fine, you win, I'm up, I'm up."

"Goodly, I'll go and get a nurse to come and take those pointy things out of your arms."

Greer rolled her eyes as he ran out of the room.

Slowly she sat up, taking care to stretch every part of her body as she went. She was allowed to go outside! Even better, she was allowed to go to the beach! Just the thought of being able to lie there in the sun made her swell with happiness.

Within the hour, she was ready to leave. Patrick wheeled her out to the front, saying that Teresa was waiting in the car for them. But when she got to the car, Teresa wasn't the only person waiting for her. Her two best friends from Michigan were sitting there, beaming excitedly at her.

"Oh my God." She whispered. She looked up at Jane, and then back to her friends. He helped her out of her chair as her friends ran up to her.

"Greer!"

"Oh my god! Olivia, Ashley! What are you doing here?" she screamed as she embraced both of her friends.

"Well, your _father _here arranged for us to be flown in.. said he was arranging something special for you." Ashley answered with a knowing look.

"What's that look for?" Greer asked with a questioning tone.

"Come on girls, we have all day to catch up, get in the car… we're burning daylight!" Jane cut in.

Greer moved towards the car, aided by her friends. As she reached the SUV, she noticed Lisbon sitting in the driver's seat.

"Hey Teresa! How's it going?" she asked cheerfully.

"Pretty good thanks Greer… but seriously.. get your skinny butt in the car before I leave without you!"

Greer giggled, but got in the car all the same.

The trip to the beach was spent mostly with the girls catching up. Greer asked the twins how everyone at school was, and her friends hounded her on why she didn't tell them she had found her father.

"It was kind of a spur in the moment thing."

"But come on Greer, we've known forever that you've been trying to find him.. you should have told us!"

"I know… but hey.. it really has been an adventure."

"So we hear…"

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked, eyeing the back of Jane's head suspiciously.

"Well, we heard that within the first few hours of being here you were arrested."

Greer heard Lisbon splutter in the driver's seat, followed by a sharp thud to Jane's shoulder.

"Dad? You been telling stories again?" Greer asked Jane.

"Never… why would you say that?"

Both Greer and Lisbon laughed at him.

"What?"

"Nothing nothing…" they replied in unison.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

It was a lovely day at the beach. There were many families who had pulled their kids out of school to enjoy the day, and the sand was just littered with towels and picnic baskets. The sun had managed to warm both the water and the sand. Greer stretched out on her towel. Soaking up the rays was the most important thing to her at the moment, and she really didn't want to waste all of her energy in the water. Olivia and Ashley had run ahead to the water, and Patrick and Teresa were busying themselves making a sandcastle. Lying there in the sun, surrounded by people who truly love her, Greer felt massively blessed. She would be sad when the twins had to leave, exams were coming up and their flight was scheduled to leave mid afternoon.

She was broken out of whatever reverie she was in, by the twins joining her, shaking salt water onto her sun warmed body.

"So? What's the deal with those two?" Ashley asked, directing her gaze towards Teresa and Patrick.

Greer chuckled. So they had noticed it too?

"It's a growing thing." She replied with a small laugh. "It seemed for a long time that everyone seemed to know they were I love, except them. Their revelations of their feelings for each other is a recent thing." Greer smiled at her earlier thought of them one day walking down the aisle together. "They make each other happy."

The twins looked at her apprehensively, cutting her out of her happy daydream.

"What?"

"We know that it's not really the right time…" Ashley said.

"But we really need to know…" Olivia continued.

"Know what?" Greer asked.

They both hesitated.

"Come on guys, just ask."

"How much longer do you have left?"

Greer sighed. She knew this had been coming. It had only been a matter of time, and their stay was drawing to a close.

"A couple of weeks… maybe less" Greer answered quietly.

"I really wish you had have let us be there for you more." Olivia said sadly.

Greer felt her heart constrict.

"I know that, but see, at least you guys have gotten used to me not being around… it wouldn't have been quite so… sudden for you."

"But Greer, we would have gotten more used to the idea… you seem to be ok with it now. I don't like the fact that you've had to go through this alone."

Greer looked out at the ocean, avoiding eye contact.

"At least one good thing has come of this though…"

"What would that be?" Greer asked, although she already know the answer.

"You got to meet your father, and it seems to helped to hopeless souls fall in love too."

Greer smiled, watching Patrick and Teresa making the sand castle.

"Yeah, at least, when I go, I'll know that I've set them up for life… and not just in that way. At least now they will have each other to lean on, rather than just depending on themselves all the time."

Greer saw Patrick smile softly, even though his head was bent slightly in his task, she knew he had heard her.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

Lisbon took Greer out to lunch, while Jane taxied the twins back to the airport. After a few tear stricken goodbyes, Greer watched the taxi disappear around the corner. Lisbon place a hand on her shoulder.

"Are you ok?" she asked her as Greer dried her face.

"Yeah… I'm just not very good at goodbyes."

"Not very many of us are." Lisbon replied with a small smile. "Now, where would you like to go for lunch?"

Greer smiled sheepishly at her.

"I could really go for a cheeseburger."

Lisbon chuckled in response.

"Well, McDonalds it is."

They ordered their food, and settled in a booth.

"Thank you for today Teresa. This has been amazing." Greer said before popping another French fry in her mouth.

"Well, you can thank me when it's over." Lisbon said.

"What? You mean there's more?"

Lisbon smiled.

"The day's not even half over yet dear."

"What else are we doing?" Greer asked, unable to contain her excitement.

Lisbon truly laughed at her this time.

"You're just going to have to wait and find out."

Greer huffed, but said nothing more.

They sat there in companionable silence for a little while longer, before Greer couldn't resist the urge any longer.

"So… Teresa… how's Patrick?" she asked mischievously.

Lisbon rolled her eyes.

"I was wondering when this was going to come up."

"Well, you owe it to me to tell me!" Greer giggled.

"Oh, and how do you get that?" Lisbon asked.

"Well, seeing as I seemed to know before either of you did, I think it's only fair that you update me."

Lisbon shook her head.

"Teenagers." She muttered.

Greer laughed, setting her food aside. She hadn't really eaten much, but her appetite had seemed to have disappeared over the last couple of days.

"Well..?" Greer pressed.

"Well what? There's not really a whole lot to tell. Things are going slow.. we acknowledge it now, but things are still pretty much the same."

"What do you mean the same?" Greer questioned.

"Well, it's not like.. there's any… physical things happening…" Lisbon paused. "Greer I don't really feel comfortable discussing this with you."

"Ew.. Teresa… I don't need to know that… I just wanted to know if you guys are happy..?"

Greer felt her cheeks burn red and was happy to look up and see the same tinge to Teresa's cheeks.

"Yeah… right. Sorry." Teresa fumbled. "Yeah, we're happy. He's kinda invited himself to live with me lately… it's good, it saves the awkward steps of asking."

"That's good Teresa.. I'm glad. How is he though? Is he getting better?"

Lisbon finished the last of her meal and started on Greer's chips. She was worried about her not eating, but didn't want to say anything about it. Why make a big deal out of the elephant in the room?

"Yeah, he's still not a hundred, but he is doing so much better than initially… wow it's amazing to think that it was a week ago that he was first admitted. It seems like so long ago…"

"So much has happened since then… right?" Greer finished.

Teresa nodded.

Lisbon looked at her watch.

"Right, let's get you dressed, your father will be here to pick you up soon."

Greer eyes Lisbon suspiciously but followed her all the same.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

_(Jane's POV)_

By the time Jane had dropped the girls off at the airport and made his way to the agreed meeting place, Greer was fed, and dressed in a new black dress. He greeted them both with a smile and lead Greer to the car. He said goodbye to Lisbon and hopped in beside her.

"Isn't Teresa coming with us? Wherever we're going." Greer asked as he pulled out into open traffic.

"No, she has some other things to organise." Jane replied, with a twinkle in his eye.

"Where are we going?" Greer tried.

"You'll see." Jane replied seriously. That's all she got for the rest of the journey.

They pulled up outside of the theatre, where the posters billboarded "Cats".

"The theatre? Your taking me to the theatre?" Greer's eyes lit up.

"Well yeah.. I saw how much you enjoyed Chicago that time, and I thought it would be great for you to see it up front."

"I've always wanted to go to the theatre! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" she reached over and hugged him. Jane, a little taken aback on how right he had been, returned the embrace with a smile.

"Shall we?"

Greer nodded and he got out and raced around to help her out of the car.

During the show, Jane felt himself more interested in watching Greer's reaction to the show. She was completely drawn to the show, a huge grin plastered on her face the entire time. When the final curtains fell, Greer was the first to her feet in the standing ovation.

Jane lead Greer out to the front, where they were greeted with a white horse and carefully decorated carriage. He heard Greer exhale as the sandy haired boy came into view. Standing in front of the carriage, with a single red rose, was Danny, the boy from the carnival.

Greer ran a nervous hand through her short hair. The last time she had seen him she had had long hair, not this short fuzz. Jane, sensing her discomfort bent down to whisper in her ear.

"He knows. He wanted to be a part of this, so we decided we would organise a real date for you."

Greer looked up at Jane. She saw how much her really loved her as his daughter, and for that moment, she was really glad she came. It was one of the first times she didn't feel guilty for burdening her sickness on him. He loved her just the way she was, and nothing was going to ruin that for her. She reached up and hugged Jane.

"Thank you so much for this… I… I couldn't possibly tell you how much this means to me." She whispered into his ear.

Jane smiled.

"You're most welcome… now go and have some fun."

He watched as Greer walked off towards Danny. Danny gave her the rose and a kiss on the cheek, before helping her into the carriage.

"Cheeky bugger."Jane said to himself as he watched Danny put his arm around her.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

_(Greer's POV)_

It was starting to get dark. The carriage took them towards a small clearing. Even from a distance Greer could see the lights. Displayed in the trees about a hundred metres away, were thousands of tiny fairy lights. As they came closer to the clearing, Greer made out a little table, made up with a white table cloth, candles, sliver wear… the lot. They had really gone all out on this one. To the side she could see Teresa and Jane, dressed as waiters.

The carriage pulled to a stop and she groaned when Danny's warmth moved to help her out of the carriage. He chuckled slightly at her and lifted her to the ground.

They made their way, hand in hand, over to the table where Jane was waiting for them.

Danny pulled her chair out for her and she chuckled slightly as she sat down.

"What?" Danny asked smiling at her.

"I thought they only did this sort of thing in movies."

Danny chuckled.

"I'm from a carnival remember, I've grown up with all of this cheesiness."

"Well I see where you get that from then." Greer heard Teresa mutter to Patrick.

She giggled, watching them both advance further towards them with dinner plates.

"Dinner is served." Patrick said theatrically as they placed the plates down.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

_(Jane's POV)_

Jane and Lisbon stayed to the side, sitting on a park bench while the teenagers ate. It really had been a successful day. Neither one of them had ever seen Greer look so happy. Jane reached out and took Teresa's hand in his own. It was about time he got that damn kiss.

"Thank you so much for helping me with today… I couldn't have done it without you."

"That's ok Jane. it was my pleasure."

Lisbon smiled warmly at him.

"You know what Teresa… that's not all I have to say thank you about. You have really been my rock in all of this. I would be dead in a gutter somewhere if it wasn't for you… and I'm not just talking about the last couple of weeks. You truly have been everything I have needed, as I've needed it. You've been my boss, my colleague, my friend. You're my soul-mate Teresa Lisbon and I love you… so very much."

He watched as Lisbon's eyes started to glisten.

"What you got something in your eye there?" he asked gently, his heart not really in the joke.

"I love you too Patrick Jane." Lisbon said, completely ignoring his sarcastic remark.

They both leant in slowly, wanting to savour the moment. As their lips touched, they both felt a zip of electricity zap through their lips. They pulled away after a moment, looking lovingly into each other eyes. Lisbon leant in again, this time with more force. She brought her hand up and ran her fingers through his hair. Jane ran his tongue over her bottom lip, begging entry. She parted her lips, granting him access to her tongue.

Jane pulled her up so she was sitting on his lap. After a few more moments, they pulled away, both slightly breathless.

"Wooooh!"

They looked over to see Greer and Danny watching them. Jane felt himself go red in the face.

"God, I feel like a teenager who just been caught by their parents playing tonsil hockey or something." Lisbon said through embarrassed giggles.

"Tonsil hockey?" Jane asked, mildly confused.

Lisbon chuckled.

"Think about it Jane. It doesn't take a mentalist to figure that one out."

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

They drove Greer back to the hospital in time for her curfew. Danny had taken the horse and carriage back to the carnival.

"Thank you so much for today guys. I actually felt half normal." Greer said as she got herself situated in her hospital room.

"Really? You should NEVER feel normal when you're around us!" Jane replied with a smirk. "But you are still most welcome. I'm glad you had a great day."

"You deserve a bit of happiness Greer, when you've given us so much of it yourself." Lisbon said to her.

"We'll come back and see you tomorrow kiddo." Jane said as he leant down and planted a kiss on her forehead.

"Get some rest." Lisbon added before she hugged her in turn.

"Night guys. I love you."

"Love you too Greer." They both replied.

Jane and Lisbon left the room hand in hand, deciding silently, that now would be a great time to go home.

**Please review? =]**


	22. Chapter 21

**A/N it's a very short update but I didn't want to go on with it any further as it leaves it open for the epilogue. For those of you who are still with me, a BIG thank you for your support! It means so much to know people are enjoying my writing.**

**I found this chapter really hard to write and I toyed around with it for ages! I'm still not completely happy with it but it will have to do.**

**Anyway, enough of my rant… I hope you enjoy =]**

Around four that morning, Jane and Lisbon were woken by the shrill ringing of the phone. Groaning at his for once peaceful sleep being interrupted, Jane rolled onto his stomach to answer.

Lisbon rolled over in bed, her eyes shining with worry. If it was a midnight case, they would have rung her phone. The fact that Jane was receiving such a late call, worried her enormously.

"Patrick Jane." he answered, rubbing his hand over his face to try to wake himself a little more.

"Mr Jane, its Doctor Rossi here."

Jane felt a stab of fear pierce through his heart. The only reason a doctor would be ringing at this time of the night would be to give bad news. _Please let her still be alive…. Please let me say goodbye._

"Greer's condition has deteriorated since her re-admittance to the hospital… we think it would be best if you and Ms Lisbon were to come right away."

Jane cleared his throat, trying to keep his emotions in check.

"Thank you doctor… we'll be there as quick as we can." Without even waiting for a reply, he hung up the phone and scrambled out of bed.

Lisbon, who had been watching Jane throughout the conversation, sat up in a rush. He didn't need to say anything for her to realise what must be happening.

She threw back the sheets and shrugged into an old hoodie before walking over to a now frantic Jane and pulling him into a tight hug.

"It'll be ok Patrick. We'll be ok." For a small moment Jane revealed in her warmth, he felt safe in her arms. He knew that the only way he was going to get through this was with his partner by his side… partner having many different meanings at this point.

Jane took a shuddering breath before releasing Lisbon and jogging down the stairs, her following close behind.

"Jane, let me drive." Lisbon called out as he went for his car keys. "You're too worked up to drive."

When Jane didn't even protest and just handed over the keys, Lisbon started to shake a little. This was _not _ going to be ok. She could see Jane blaming himself, going back to the what ifs. What if they didn't take her out yesterday? What if he had known there was something wrong sooner? Could they have possibly saved her more pain? Could they have figured out a way to extend her life? Lisbon shook her head, trying to clear the thoughts away.

On the way to the hospital, Jane looked pale and withdrawn, his breathing coming out in soft gasps.

"Patrick, I know you're hurting but you need to try to calm yourself down a little… you'll induce another episode."

Jane looked at Lisbon, his expression showing he clearly thought she was being ridiculous. How could he be calm at a time like this? His daughter was dying. He might not make it to be there with her. He has had to live with the guilt of Charlotte having to die alone for what feels like an eternity, and he sure as hell wasn't going to let that happen to Greer.

"Can't this thing go any faster?" Jane snapped before he could stop himself.

When Lisbon didn't answer, but the houses started zooming past him with greater speed, he took that as a sign of understanding. Lisbon loved Greer too. He was being selfish again.

Reaching out for her hand, as a sign of apology, Jane leant his head against his chair, trying to keep himself calm. If his stomach was to play up now… well all hell would break loose.

They pulled up to the hospital parking lot in record time, and they both took off at a run towards the oncology intensive care unit.

Jane slowed just outside Greer's room when he saw Dr Rossi standing outside waiting for them.

"Mr Jane, Ms Lisbon." Rossi said nodding towards each of them.

"What happened?" Jane asked in a rush.

"We have been noticing for a while that Greer has been rapidly deteriorating, it was just a matter of time."

Jane hung his head.

"Where's her mother?"

"On her way." The doctor replied.

"Is there nothing you can do?" Jane cried desperately.

The doctor shook his head sadly. "All we can do is keep her comfortable. She has been in and out of consciousness since around midnight."

Jane looked guiltily at the doctor. Rossi, sensing his unease, stepped forward and placed a hand on Jane's shoulder.

"Mr Jane I need you to know that you and Ms Lisbon taking her out yesterday didn't trigger this. It was going to happen sooner or later. I must say, I haven't seen Greer so happy than what she was when you dropped her back. You made her feel like one very special girl. Remember that."

Jane reached out and shook the man's hand.

"Thank you doctor."

Rossi nodded in return.

"She's been asking for you both, you can go in when you're ready. Call us if you need anything." With one last look at the pair, Rossi turned and walked down the corridor.

Taking Jane's hand, Lisbon lead him quietly through the door and into Greer's room.

She was paler than either of them had ever seen her, with an oxygen mask placed firmly over her mouth. Her eyes were closed, but Jane could tell that she was awake, only resting.

"Greer honey? Can you open your eyes?" Jane heard Lisbon say.

They were rewarded with a small blue slit as Greer tried to crack her eyes open.

"Dad? Teresa?" she rasped.

"We're here honey." Lisbon replied as she made her way over to the bed. Jane on the other hand stayed standing stiffly in the doorway.

Jane was at a complete loss for words. He had been so worried that he would be too late to say goodbye that he didn't even have time to think about what he was going to say to her when he got here.

"Dad? I'm not… contagious. You can… come a little… closer." Greer said at her attempt of lightening the situation.

Jane tried to smile, he really did, but all that came out was a pained grimace.

"I'm sorry Greer." He said coming over and kissing her on the forehead. "We got here as soon as we could."

"I know." She replied managing a smile. "Thank you."

Lisbon sat at the end of the bed, her hand on Greer's leg and Jane sat on the side of the bed, holding his daughter's hand. Her skin felt cold to the touch.

"Greer you're cold." He said, rubbing his own hands over hers in attempt to warm them.

"They are? I didn't… even realise."

In the movies the characters always went cold before they were about to die, and just before they did let go, they lost all feeling, unable to feel touch or temperature… their senses turning off one by one. Both Lisbon and Jane knew that this was happening to Greer.

"Thank you… for… yesterday." Greer croaked. She was out of breath and beginning to have a tough time getting her words out.

"Shhh sweetheart, save your breath." Jane whispered.

Greer shook her head.

"No… need to… say… this…. You… are both… wonderful. Lucky… to have… you both… in my life." She panted.

"We're the lucky ones Greer. You've taught us both so much." Lisbon replied, with a slight squeeze to her leg. When Greer didn't even respond to the touch, Lisbon began to worry. They didn't have much time left.

"Greer, thank you for coming to find me." Jane said, his eyes starting to glaze over with tears. "You gave me a second chance at love."

Greer stared at them both knowingly.

"I'll… be watching… when you… get married." Lisbon smiled through her own tears. This girl truly was remarkable. It just wasn't fair that they were going to lose her to this wicked disease.

Greer looked around the room.

"Mom?" she asked, a hint of remorse in her voice. She knew her time was draining fast, she couldn't hold on much longer. If her mother wasn't so selfish … she would have been closer… she could have been here.

Jane just shook his head.

"She's on her way sweetie. You hold on."

Greer just smiled and shook her head sadly.

Jane seeing this, started to panic.

"No! You can't leave Greer! Not yet!" Jane cried, bringing her hand up to his face and kissing it softly.

"I… love… you…" Greer said, smiling softly at both of them. She then drew one lat shuddering breath, and was still.

"I love you too." Jane wept, bringing his hand to her face and closing her eyes. He kissed her on the forehead and whispered his goodbyes, never once letting go of her hand.

Wiping her face, Lisbon got off the bed and walked around to Jane, holding his head to her chest. She let him cry softly into her shoulder, kissing him softly on the crown of his head every so often.

About half an hour later, they heard the familiar click of heels before Tracy's head popped around the corner. The medical staff had informed her of Greer's passing already, but had stayed out of the room to give Jane and Lisbon their space.

She walked softly into the room, as not to disturb them… the most courteous thing she had managed since she clicked back into his life.

"Oh Greer…" she whispered quietly. "Oh my poor baby…" she walked over to the other side of the bed and took Greer's free hand.

For a long while, the three adults stayed in the room, mourning the passing of such a vibrant life.

Jane was beginning to wonder if you could die of a broken heart. It had nearly succeeded once… he wasn't so sure if her could come back from this one. The only thing keeping him from completely losing it, was the small raven haired beauty holding onto him for dear life.

If they were both going to make it through in one piece, they were going to have to do it together.

**Please review! I would love to know what you all thought of the chapter, and also any ideas you may have for the epilogue. =] thanks for reading xx**


	23. Epilogue

**A/N Well… this is it. The epilogue to Patrick Jane's Daughter. *Sniff *.. it's been one hell of a year writing this and while I'm glad that I finally got it finished.. I'm also really sad that it's over.**

**A Big MASSIVE thanks to all my readers and reviewers! I wouldn't have finished this without your support. And also a big thanks to DanH2010 for supporting me throughout this entire fic! You guys are all AMAZING!**

**OOH.. and just quickly! Devil's Cherry… AMA-ZING! Gonna say it has made it to my favourite episode lists. So heartbreaking!**

**But anyway… enough of my rant… I hope you enjoy this =] xxx**

Jane hadn't really been speaking much. Lisbon noticed that he only ever talked when it was just the two of them. She wasn't a hundred per cent why he was avoiding the rest of the team, but she had a nagging suspicion that if he didn't talk about it, then it wasn't happening. And she was quite contented to go along with it.

Tracy and Greer had made the funeral arrangements a month or so before Greer left. Tracy had thought it to be morbid but Greer had insisted that she had her own input… one being that she didn't want anyone, under any circumstances to wear black. They weren't to mourn her… she wanted everyone to celebrate her life.

Jane and Lisbon had flown to Michigan a week earlier, in order to help Tracy with the final arrangements, and the rest of the team had flown in, in time for the funeral.

The funeral was scheduled for midday, in a small garden that Greer had loved. Jane found himself alone in a room with Tracy and Steve, checking over the catering, as Lisbon had gone to pick the team up from the airport.

As they were going over the final arrangements, a florist came in, demanding the attention of one of the three. With one look at his wife, Steve left the two alone.

After a slightly awkward silence, Jane decided to make conversation. The same question had been buzzing around his head for nearly eighteen years, and it was about damn time he got his answers.

He put down his checklist and looked at Tracy.

"Why did you leave?" he asked, slightly startling her.

"You know why I left." She said.

"If I did… then I wouldn't be asking." He stepped closer to her so she had to look at him.

"Look do we have to do this now? I'm burying my daughter in a couple of hours."

Jane looked at her incredulously

"Yes… and so am I!" he shot back.

"You barely even knew her… how can you even say that?"

Jane growled low in his throat.

"Whose fault is that Tracy? Who kept her a secret for seventeen years!?" he cried. "Why would you do that to me? Why did you leave?!" he repeated.

"Because I was scared!" she cried out.

Jane looked at her feeling slightly confused.

"Scared? What? Why were you scared?"

"I was afraid…" she sighed, hesitating. "I was afraid I was never going to see you again."

"So _you_ left?" Jane asked in a slightly harsh tone. "What was the point in that?"

"I… I don't know. I didn't want to be just another one of your clients. Just a quick fix to keep you going. We were young, it was so long ago."

Jane moved away from her, trying to keep the situation delicate. This was the first time in a long time he had seen his Tracy. The one he had respected and loved.

"And when you found out you were pregnant… why not come back then? I had a right to know I had a kid Tracy. You know I did."

Tracy hung her head sadly.

"I know and I'm sorry! But by the time I had worked up enough courage to tell you, you had already left, rejoined the circus… met Angela." She whispered quietly.

"Oh…" Jane didn't know how to react to that. It was hard for him to think if he had stayed in that town for just a few more weeks, Tracy might have found him, but then if he had have stayed… he wouldn't have met his wife. He could feel himself being torn in two different directions.

"Tracy… I'll stay here to bury our daughter… but then I'm leaving. I'll go back to California… and you won't ever have to see me again… if that's what you want. Or… we can stay in touch. You were by best friend before you left…" He walked towards her, clasping her arm gently. "…and I would never have hurt you on purpose."

Tracy then dissolved into a fit of fresh tears.

"God I'm sorry Patrick… I'm so sorry."

Jane enveloped her in a soft hug then, rubbing her awkwardly on the back as she cried into his shoulder.

"She's my baby… she's my little girl!" Tracy sobbed.

"I know… shhh." Jane cooed softly, keeping his own emotions in check. He couldn't really feel anything anymore. He figured it was his body's way of dealing with the stress and the grief.

He couldn't wait for Lisbon to get back.

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

The funeral itself was beautiful, the gardens had been decorated specially, with every one of Greer's favourite flowers and colours. The coffin was a pristine white, with beautiful carvings in the wood.

Jane was sitting holding Lisbon's hand on one side, and Tracy's on the other. Lisbon had looked at him questioningly, but had kept silent, knowing It wouldn't help anything by asking. The rest of the team were seated behind them, heads bowed in respect.

Jane caught the eyes of Ashley and Olivia and nodded towards them. They were both tear stricken and were clinging on to each other for dear life.

Jane sat there listening to the priest ramble on as if he knew her… who knows… maybe he did. Sitting there, listening to stories about his daughter that he never knew, he began to realise how much he had really missed out on… and that he would never be able to know this side of her. She was gone. He felt himself beginning to panic, the anxiety building up in his chest, crushing him. The only thing that was keeping him from completely flipping out, was the small woman next to him. With a slight squeeze to his hand, he could tell Lisbon had noticed his discomfort, and was doing everything she could in order to help him in that moment. She knew that just by being there with him, she could help keep him sane.

Ashley and Olivia got up together to speak about Greer. They were her oldest friends and felt that they should show their respect by telling a story that would have mortified Greer.

After hearing something about a tractor, a pond and the fire brigade, Jane decided to zone out slightly. He busied himself with looking at Lisbon out of the corner of his eye. She looked positively beautiful, laughing through her tears at the ridiculous story that was being told.

When the time came for Jane to get up and speak, he felt his nerves get the better of him. He sat there frozen, unable to move or think. Lisbon, noticing this, pulled him up and lead him up to the front, not letting him go once they got there.

With an encouraging nod from Lisbon, Jane cleared his throat.

"When my family died… I never thought I would get another chance to love again… let alone be a father… so when Greer showed up… well you could say I was a little skeptical at first." He looked around at the people staring up at him. Everyone was nodding in encouragement, smiling softly through their grief. His show-boy antics getting the better of him, Jane couldn't stop himself saying the next words. "I wasn't the only one who was skeptical though… my dear Teresa here…" he felt Lisbon tense beside him. "Well she actually arrested Greer within an hour of her showing up." He flashed a grin at everyone, cutting the tension in the room, and causing everyone to chuckle slightly. Everyone but Lisbon and Tracy that is. One look at Lisbon's face, and he knew he was going to be in for it later.

"But that's a story for another time... In all seriousness…" he started again. "Although I didn't know Greer for a very long time, she still completely captivated my heart, as I'm sure she did with all of you. It shatters me to know that such a bright life has been extinguished by such a terrible disease." He hung his head. "I know I'll miss her terribly… but I'm also so grateful for the time we did have together. She gave me hope… and I will forever cherish that."

He cleared his throat and nodded towards Greer's loved ones.

"Thank you all for being here today. I know it would have meant the world to Greer." With that he took off back to his seat and the priest took their place at the front.

"And now, I invite the pallbearers to come forth, for Greer's final journey, to her favourite song." He said softly.

Jane and Lisbon rose back to their feet, followed closely by Tracy, Steve, Ashley and Olivia. As they moved towards the coffin, Billy Joel's _Piano Man_ started playing. They all walked slowly through the garden, walking past everyone who had played some part in Greer's life. Jane just kept looking straight ahead, trying to keep his breathing steady. This feeling was all too familiar. Another girl he had grown to love more than anything, murdered by a horrible monster. While he may not be able to avenge this death, he might be able to begin to move on from Angela and Charlotte's death… he might be able to begin to focus on something positive… not indulge in his unhealthy obsession with Red John. Sure if he got the chance, he would still kill the bastard… but he was beginning to feel he needed to focus his energy on more important things. He looked over at Lisbon and saw her standing with her arms folded in on herself, trying not to cry. Like her…

He reached out and pulled her close, kissing her softly on the head. She had loved Greer too. The whole team had.

He looked up to see Grace, Rigsby and Cho walking towards them. Grace immediately walked up to them, with red rimmed eyes and pulled them both into a hug. Rigsby and Cho shook Jane's hand, offering their own condolences in the only way they knew how.

_Yep_. He thought to himself. _These people are a much better way to focus my energy._

**OOOOOoooooOOOOO**

The afternoon after the funeral found Lisbon and Jane walking quietly down the beach. Lisbon looked over at Jane to see an expressionless mask placed firmly on his face. He hadn't cried since the day she died… To have all that emotion pent up inside… Lisbon felt he was on the verge of exploding.

"Jane?" she asked tentatively.

He looked at her solemnly, before returning his gaze to the ocean. The clouds hung slightly overcast over the water, with the sun trying to escape forming a haze of watery oranges and yellows.

Trying again, but this time with contact rather than words, Lisbon reached out and softly took his hand.

"She's ok, you know?" Lisbon started.

"Hmmm?" he asked as if he had heard her incorrectly.

"Greer… I know she's being taken care of."

They stopped walking and Jane shook his head slightly, looking sadly into Lisbon's eyes.

"How can you say that? How can you know that Teresa? You have no proof…"

Lisbon brought his hand up to her mouth, kissing the still slightly bruised knuckle.

"Patrick… I know this because I can feel it. It fills me up, guides me… allows me to see things more clearly."

Jane exhaled and looked back out to the sea.

"Jane? Why are you so against believing?"

"I…" he sighed again. "I'm not _against _anything. I _want _to believe… but I just can't. I would like to believe that there was a place to go… a place to be… after we die. But to me… it doesn't help. It doesn't bring them back." He cupped the side of her cheek. "To me, heaven is a place that we have fabricated in our minds to let the passing be easier…" he dropped his hand back to his side and hung his head, looking at their still intertwined fingers. "I would like it to be real… so very much."

Lisbon reached out and placed her own hand on his cheek, willing him to look at her.

"Just because you can't see it, it doesn't mean it's not there." she said softly. A moment later, she could see the tears coming to his eyes… finally. She really wasn't trying to make him cry… honestly… all she wanted to do was give him a small release… and if crying worked… then so be it.

As soon as it started, Jane couldn't control his emotions any longer. With his eyes leaking at their own accord, he brought his hands up to his face, slightly, but unnecessarily, embarrassed by his momentary weakness… unnecessary because this was Lisbon, and he knew she wouldn't judge him in any way.

Lisbon sat him down on a near-by park bench and held him close, whispering soothing nothings in his ear.

"Shh, it's ok… let it out."

After a few moments, Jane lifted his head, muttering apologies and something about how he was meant to be the strong one. He sat there for a moment, with his eyes closed, breathing softly. The sun crept out from behind one of the clouds, warming his tear stained face. He felt a wash of warmth flow through him, and he knew it had nothing to do with the sun.

Greer…

He felt her existence fill him up, making his heart beat erratically… but in a good way. He felt a sense of security and love flow through him, and it was then he knew she was ok… and that he was ok too.

He smiled softly, exhaling in relief.

When he finally looked at Lisbon, his eyes turned soft.

"Thank you Teresa… for being here with me."

Lisbon smiled slightly at that.

"Where else would I be?" she said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

At that, Jane leant in, kissing her softly at first, before delving in hungrily after a silent consent from Lisbon. When things were starting to get a little too heated for Lisbon liking, she pulled away with a soft sigh.

"Jane stop… we can't do this now… or right here for the matter."

Jane smiled sheepishly at her.

"Ohh… I must have been naughty if you called me by my last name."

Lisbon laughed at that.

"Hey Teresa…"

"Yes Patrick?"

"Do you still think I'm pretty?"

At that Lisbon reached out to smack him on the shoulder, but he was too fast. He ran off down the beach with her hot on his heels. She caught up with him and grabbed his hand, turning him to face her.

"I love you Patrick Jane."

"And I love you too Teresa Lisbon." Jane replied softly, pulling her close and kissing her tenderly.

So long as they had each other, they were both going to be ok.

**Well that's it! A bit of a cliche ending but hey! who doesn't like a nice hunk of cheese! Please leave me a review on what you think. Sequel? Or not… I have a few ideas but I don't want to start something if nobody's keen! Lol! Thanks for reading anyway! xxxxxxxx**


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